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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) |
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TextsFromSuperheroes |
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Texts from Superheroes is a comedy blog focused around images of texts between various superheroes (generally comics from Marvel and DC, though movie-verse jokes are made as well), and occasionally characters from other fiction. It's expanded into also doing sketches. The blog makes fun of characters, concepts and various other aspects of superhero comics/movies. Certainly worth a read, even if you aren't that knowledgeable about superhero comics. Find it here. The creators also have a Youtube channel entitled Sketch From Superheroes. |
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2023-12-08T02:00:28Z |
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2023-12-08T02:00:28Z |
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Dropped link to Blackmail: Not a Feature - ITEM |
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Dropped link to IronMan: Not a Feature - ITEM |
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Dropped link to Troll: Not a Feature - IGNORE |
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DBTropes |
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Secret Identity |
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Another conversation has Lois telling Clark that according to the doctor, she's got radiation poisoning. He asked if she works with x-rays...which she does, without knowing it. |
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Arbitrary Skepticism |
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Arbitrary Skepticism: Inverted. Robin points out that with all the crazy stuff in the DC universe going on, why wouldn't he believe that the Easter Bunny is real? Iron Fist believes in Santa for similar reasons, and the Richards family chooses to "play it safe" when it comes to St. Nick◊. |
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Does This Remind You of Anything? |
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Does This Remind You of Anything?: This conversation between Shou-Lao and Iron Fist sounds an awful lot like a person running into an old one-night stand. |
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No Backwards Compatibility in the Future |
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No Backwards Compatibility in the Future: Cable provides a data packet for preventing a future apocalypse; however, it's on a device with a little triangular port that's not compatible with any present-day connectors. Professor X concludes that they'll just have to watch ongoing tech developments and hope the triangle-port connector comes on the market while there's still time to act on the information. |
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Tempting Fate |
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Tempting Fate: "One more set-up and he may go to war with a friend." |
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Workout Fanservice |
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Workout Fanservice: How Captain America got 70 million Snapchat followers in one day. |
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"Well Done, Son" Guy |
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"Well Done, Son" Guy: Robin sometimes comes off as desperate for Batman's approval◊. |
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Heh Heh, You Said "X" |
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Deadpool goaded Elektra into saying he was given a hand job. The threat of assassins sent after him did not ruin the moment for him. |
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Who Shot JFK? |
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Who Shot JFK?: Implied to be Bucky, though Cap somehow failed to noticed. |
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Screw the Rules, I Have Money! |
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Screw the Rules, I Have Money!: Referenced when Batman says he'll take Damien as a sidekick while keeping the current Robin as a spare. Iron Man explicitly mentions that the best power someone can have is being a rich white guy◊. |
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Companion Cube |
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Companion Cube: "No don't hurt Battle Van he's my best friend." |
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Our Centaurs Are Different |
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Our Centaurs Are Different: Apparently, one of the things Tony did during a New Year's Party that Thor held was a centaur mare named Carolyn.◊ |
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Verbal Tic |
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Verbal Tic: On more than◊ one occasion◊, Thor refers to Tony and Bruce as "Friend Stark" and "Friend Banner" respectively. Interestingly, he doesn't use that title with anyone else. |
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What Did I Do Last Night? |
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What Did I Do Last Night?: Luthor had one wild Halloween. After going to a Halloween party as Superman, he got drunk enough to jump out a window. Supes caught him before he could splat and Luthor tried to kiss him. The Joker, who tells him, finds it completely hilarious. Gambit can't remember what he did at that party last night. Tony's New Years Eve party was especially hazy after Thor made the scene◊ |
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Non-Indicative Name |
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Non-Indicative Name: Tony doesn't quite get that the Immortal Iron Fist isn't literally immortal. |
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Lampshade Hanging |
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Lampshade Hanging: A common theme— everything from nonsensical character names to poorly designed costumes is pointed out and discussed. Here concerning the "non-lethal" batmobile from Batman: Arkham Knight. |
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The Dreaded |
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The Dreaded: The Punisher is this for Taskmaster.◊ |
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Rich in Dollars, Poor in Sense |
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Rich in Dollars, Poor in Sense: The times Batman flaunts his wealth could take up its own separate article. For example: there's a lot of sharp dressed homeless people in Gotham thanks to him disposing of his suits like used napkins.◊ |
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Even Evil Has Standards |
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Even Evil Has Standards: When Iron Man and Tony are discussing how The Mandarin is the villain of Iron Man 3, Red Skull◊ pops in just to say how even he finds the character offensive. |
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Present Peeking |
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Present Peeking: One Robin asks Superman to come over and x-ray his presents. Supes refuses, not because it's against the Christmas spirit, but because the last time he tried it, Batman decorated the tree in Kryptonite. |
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Mad Scientist |
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Mad Scientist: Krypton's Council might not have been wrong about Jor-El after all... |
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Hammerspace |
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Hammerspace: Lampshaded with Black Widow◊. |
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Mister Seahorse |
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Mister Seahorse: Sue Storm of the Fantastic Four once told Reed Richards he couldn't handle pregnancy—but then later she walked in on him trying to impregnate himself with his Pregnancy Laser 2.0. |
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Skewed Priorities |
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Skewed Priorities: Apparently, vilifying Spider-Man trumps more urgent news for J. Jonah Jameson. |
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Surprisingly Realistic Outcome |
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Surprisingly Realistic Outcome: What happens when a guy douses himself in radiation trying to get Hulk's powers. Another conversation has Lois telling Clark that according to the doctor, she's got radiation poisoning. He asked if she works with x-rays...which she does, without knowing it. No Thor, you can't charge household objects with lightning the same way you do with Tony's armor.◊ |
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A.I. Is a Crapshoot |
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A.I. Is a Crapshoot: Tony manages to make Cyber Monday sentient, "and it is pissed about these deals!" |
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Paper-Thin Disguise |
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Paper-Thin Disguise: In the "yes it's really me online, guys" flavor, with Tony skeptical on whether or not to invite Bruce to Thanksgiving, not sure if he'll get Bruce of The Hulk... |
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Fish out of Temporal Water |
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Fish out of Temporal Water: There have been several jokes about Captain America being behind the times, so to speak. Wolverine's amnesia makes him a perfect foil for Cap in this type of joke. |
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Awesome Aussie |
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Awesome Aussie: Subverted, in that Captain Boomerang is actually from Brooklyn — he really liked Crocodile Dundee, though. |
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Power Perversion Potential |
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Power Perversion Potential: Flash has a "vibrate setting." |
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Crazy-Prepared |
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Crazy-Prepared: Just in case Robin asks Superman to peek at Christmas presents... Hawkeye has an exploding water-arrow in case of fire monsters. |
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Fearless Fool |
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Fearless Fool: "No, I'm Daredevil. I'm the man without fear." |
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Almighty Mom |
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Almighty Mom: Gender-flipped. Thor would rather that Tony make a Thor-buster armor as a contingency plan in case Thor goes rogue, rather than call his father Odin◊. |
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Instant Costume Change |
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Instant Costume Change: Flash gets naked in front of everyone...only for a microsecond |
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Kryptonite-Proof Suit |
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Kryptonite-Proof Suit: Supergirl asks Superman why she was never informed of the existence of Kryptonite-proof suits. He explains his enemies would not leave him alone if he was totally invulnerable. And when he says "enemies", he means Batman. |
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My New Gift Is Lame |
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My New Gift Is Lame: Hal and Carol aren't exactly on the same gift-giving page◊. Batman may be rich, but giving good gifts is apparently one of the many superpowers he does not have◊. Batman also enjoys invoking this, dropping by the Daily Planet just to give Lois Lane misinformation about what gifts Clark would like. |
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Grievous Harm with a Body |
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Grievous Harm with a Body: Luke Cage gets an interim job on the Avengers as Cap's substitute shield after Ultron breaks the real one. |
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type |
Evil Lawyer Joke |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_63c6a75c |
comment |
Evil Lawyer Joke: Daredevil suggests Spiderman get a lawyer and sue the ''Daily Bugle for libel, only to get a joke about how horrible lawyers are. Daredevil says it's absolutely not hurtful◊. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_63c6a75c |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_658f7193 |
type |
Lack of Empathy |
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comment |
Lack of Empathy: Spidey toward Sandman. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_658f7193 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_66ea7e5c |
type |
Brought Down to Normal |
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comment |
Brought Down to Normal: The Justice League lets Superman know that this trope is no excuse to sit out a mission. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_66ea7e5c |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_670db7d7 |
type |
Formula-Breaking Episode |
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comment |
Formula-Breaking Episode: There have been a couple of times where they've done texts between non-superhero characters. Examples include Mario and Luigi and Han Solo and Luke Skywalker |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_6e37c196 |
type |
Once Done, Never Forgotten |
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comment |
Once Done, Never Forgotten: Batman will never let Green Arrow forget about Speedy doing drugs. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_6e37c196 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_7012424f |
type |
Stealth Hi/Bye |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_7012424f |
comment |
Stealth Hi/Bye: Discussed here. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_7012424f |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_70489c17 |
type |
Superman Stays Out of Gotham |
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comment |
Superman Stays Out of Gotham: Enforced by Batman himself. |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_71197402 |
type |
Butter Face |
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comment |
Butterface: The term itself is never actually used, but Poison Ivy seems to think that Swamp Thing fits the description◊. |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_7175cb16 |
type |
Clark Kenting |
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comment |
Clark Kenting: Actually not effective, as Metallo used facial recognition and Luthor already knew - having ignored it purely so Clark Kent wouldn't fight crime 24/7. |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_776a06eb |
type |
All Myths Are True |
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comment |
All Myths Are True: According to Doctor Strange, every religion is right... except Scientology. "Not even close." |
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type |
N-Word Privileges |
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comment |
N-Word Privileges: Unless Logan was just trolling, wolverines (and Wolverine himself) have one◊: |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_7a3dd888 |
type |
Real Men Wear Pink |
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comment |
Real Men Wear Pink: Wolverine celebrates Remembrance Day, complete with wearing a red poppy. Cyclops gives him grief for getting all mushy about him wearing a flower based on a poem. Wolverine threatens to get all stabby on him. He's also not afraid to admit that he's cried |
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type |
Dating Catwoman |
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comment |
Dating Catwoman: Clark asks Bruce outright concerning the trope namer. |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_7e07f634 |
type |
Paranoia Fuel |
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comment |
Paranoia Fuel: In-universe, Tony Stark tends to keep SHIELD brass up at night. Take, for example, his plans for celebrating the Fourth◊... |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_7e6c0522 |
type |
Off with His Head! |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_7e6c0522 |
comment |
Off with His Head!: Bucky and The Falcon both had trouble using Steve's shield at first: |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_7eebe99c |
type |
The Alcoholic |
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comment |
The Alcoholic: One of the earliest jokes was about Iron Man's drinking habit. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_7eebe99c |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_823c6e3e |
type |
Large Ham |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_823c6e3e |
comment |
Large Ham: Among others, Thor shares this quality with his MCU counterpart. He uses very ornate English and gets excited over almost everything. |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_83445b04 |
type |
Pun |
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comment |
Pun: "I'm broken, Steve, I'm broken!" "Well, lucky for you, AVENGERS ASSEMBLE!" Bucky is not amused. Batman doesn't want to listen to Robin's stories.◊ He says it's just too many puns, he can't take it. In Iron Fist's defense, this one was slightly forced◊. "There's a reason we don't call you She-Joker, Harley." |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_83641c73 |
type |
Logical Weakness |
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comment |
Logical Weakness: The ability to copy anyone's fighting style and predict their every move doesn't really help against someone whose fighting style is "a roof, a sniper rifle, and a bullet." Illusion powers don't work on someone who's blind. Daredevil didn't even notice that Mysterio was trying to trick him. |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_86f4f393 |
type |
Stating the Simple Solution |
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comment |
Stating the Simple Solution: After Iron Fist finds out Luke Cage is filling as Cap's shield: |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_8c23b321 |
type |
Harmless Villain |
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comment |
Harmless Villain: Mysterio, much to his dismay. |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_91cab736 |
type |
Major Injury Underreaction |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_91cab736 |
comment |
Major Injury Underreaction: Deadpool considers getting shot with 1300 arrows and nearly 100 harpoons as just "a helluva day" for him. |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_96b89043 |
type |
Not So Above It All |
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comment |
Not So Above It All: Batman, at times. This is especially evident when he "unofficially" endorses Wonder Woman crashing her invisible jet into Lex Luthor's house. Reed Richards has a moment when Doctor Doom tries to use his diplomatic immunity to get away with his latest crime and Reed retaliates by calling Thor and Black Panther, who also have diplomatic immunity, to deal with him and sends the mocking Spongebob meme when Doom complains. |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_98c95895 |
type |
Time Crash |
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comment |
Time Crash: The inconsistencies on the MCU timeline in Civil War and Homecoming are attributed to Doctor Strange meddling with time. |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_991af300 |
type |
Poke the Poodle |
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comment |
Poke the Poodle: Poison Ivy is not used to traditional crime. |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_9ae0ead1 |
type |
Villains Out Shopping |
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comment |
Villains Out Shopping: Gorilla Grodd is willing to go to the movies to watch Star Wars. |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_9fbf8969 |
type |
Cut Lex Luthor a Check |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_9fbf8969 |
comment |
Cut Lex Luthor a Check: Discussed here. |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_ac546cd4 |
type |
Worth It |
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comment |
Worth It: As stated under Pun, Cap would rather give up having Bucky on the Avengers than the chance to keep making puns. Deadpool goaded Elektra into saying he was given a hand job. The threat of assassins sent after him did not ruin the moment for him. |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_aca32000 |
type |
Armor-Piercing Response |
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comment |
Armor-Piercing Response: Batman texting the wrong person turns into one of these: |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_ae3d6438 |
type |
Deadpan Snarker |
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comment |
Deadpan Snarker: Many, many punchlines appear to be delivered in this fashion. Batman is probably the most frequent perpetrator. |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_b3230549 |
type |
419 Scam |
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comment |
419 Scam: Thor fell for one, to Iron Man's dismay. |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_b47d95be |
type |
No OSHA Compliance |
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comment |
No OSHA Compliance: M.O.D.O.K. tries to avert this, but it turns out it makes it very easy for other Avengers to disguise themselves and get close to him. |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_b4a6ae4c |
type |
Everyone Has Standards |
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comment |
Everyone Has Standards: General Ross doesn't take to kindly to recruiting Child Soldiers. |
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1.0 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_b4a6ae4c |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_b53077b3 |
type |
Take That! |
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comment |
Take That!: One instance has Batman announcing that Luthor has come up with a new plan to vilify him and Superman — he's hired Zack Snyder to make a movie about them. |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_b5a47148 |
type |
Captain Crash |
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comment |
Captain Crash: Captain America is on a no-fly list due to his track record with anything that flies. As Hawkeye points out, his motorbikes don't fare much better; he has a habit of using them as projectile weapons. |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_b72ae7 |
type |
Omnidisciplinary Scientist |
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comment |
Omnidisciplinary Scientist: Doctor Strange is quick to remind people that his title isn't just for show. |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_b7475a74 |
type |
Bothering by the Book |
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comment |
Bothering by the Book: Cap is really reluctant to help Iron Man on account of the Sokovia accords. Until... |
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1.0 |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_b97f8642 |
type |
Razor Apples |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_b97f8642 |
comment |
Razor Apples: There isn't any ever, as it's an urban legend, but that doesn't stop Superman from flying over the city to check who has the best haul. |
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| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_bce16d24 |
type |
Why Don't You Just Shoot Him? |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_bce16d24 |
comment |
Why Don't You Just Shoot Him?: The Punisher's advice to Spider-Man on taking out the Green Goblin. Spiderman refuses because the Goblin is also his best friend's dad. |
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type |
Blunt "Yes" |
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comment |
Blunt "Yes": Robin's response to an obvious question. |
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1.0 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_bedd799b |
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type |
Discredited Meme |
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comment |
Discredited Meme: In-Universe Ant-Man was really not too keen on the whole crawl-up-into-Thanos'-ass-while-tiny-and expand-to-GiAnt-Man-size plan. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_bf6da1b1 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_bf6da1b1 |
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type |
Weaksauce Weakness |
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comment |
Weaksauce Weakness: Turns out Mysterio's natural weakness is Daredevil's blindness. Batman compiles a list of his fellow heroes' weaknesses. However, Wonder Woman knows better than to reveal any of hers. |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_c09dbbbb |
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type |
Reading the Stage Directions Out Loud |
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comment |
Reading the Stage Directions Out Loud: A transcribing the verbal instructions into a text message variation. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_c1d5b78 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_c1d5b78 |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_c564ef1 |
type |
Solve the Soup Cans |
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comment |
Solve the Soup Cans: Chris and Jill lampshade Raccoon City's tendency to do this. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_c564ef1 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_c564ef1 |
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type |
Bedlam House |
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comment |
Bedlam House: Harley and Bane discuss Arkham. |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_c6c5ce4 |
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type |
Especially Zoidberg |
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comment |
Especially Zoidberg: "We are all related." "Even the dog?" "Especially the dog." |
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1.0 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_c7f96bce |
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type |
Informed Ability |
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comment |
Informed Ability: Even Thanos doesn't know why people fear him. |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_ca3a6dbd |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d148b019 |
type |
Mundane Made Awesome |
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comment |
Mundane Made Awesome: Just like in his films, Thor gets excited over things that Midgardians take for granted: |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d148b019 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d148b019 |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d295a79e |
type |
Just Here for Godzilla |
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comment |
Just Here for Godzilla: Just Here For Miles Morales. Lampshaded here. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d295a79e |
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1.0 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d295a79e |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d3aad64a |
type |
Morally Ambiguous Doctorate |
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comment |
Morally Ambiguous Doctorate: Lampshaded here. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d3aad64a |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d3aad64a |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d635e82c |
type |
Highly-Visible Ninja |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d635e82c |
comment |
Highly-Visible Ninja: Batman is well aware that Robin's costume makes him easy to see◊. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d635e82c |
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1.0 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d635e82c |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d9cf40fa |
type |
Screw This, I'm Outta Here |
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comment |
Screw This, I'm Outta Here: When told that the Hulk has gone on an insane rampage, Cap, Thor and Widow immediately get scarce◊. After Hawkeye asks to be the token male on the all-female Avengers, this is his reaction when She-Hulk tells him he'll have to suffer the same things the token females normally endure on all-male teams. Dr. Doom announces to the world he's defeated the Fantastic Four. The Avengers, the X-Men, the Defenders, and the Heroes for Hire all call dibs, until Iron Man just suggests they all go together to make this easy. Doom, well... |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_d9cf40fa |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_dc8ba6d5 |
type |
The Scapegoat |
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comment |
The Scapegoat: One conversation has Superman and Jimmy discussing Lois' upcoming birthday. When Jimmy suggests Superman give Lois her own signal watch, Supes says it's a best friends thing. After Jimmy asks why, Superman reveals that he gave him the watch so that Supes' enemies kidnap him and leave Lois alone. |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_dc8ba6d5 |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_dc9e682b |
type |
Color Character |
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comment |
Color Character: Discussed. What do you mean White Tiger isn't white? It's in her name, isn't it?◊ |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_dc9e682b |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_dd9fba61 |
type |
A Rare Sentence |
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comment |
A Rare Sentence: "Well, I can't believe I'm saying this, but Star Lord, Shang-Chi, and Katy saved planet Earth with a karaoke dance party." |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_dd9fba61 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_dd9fba61 |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_e34400ab |
type |
Ambiguously Gay |
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comment |
Ambiguously Gay: Mr. Terrific has a weird obsession with balls. |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_e34400ab |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_e624f0e8 |
type |
Suspiciously Specific Denial |
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comment |
Suspiciously Specific Denial: Clint's really not helping himself here... "Just a guess. Nothing Illuminati about it." |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_e624f0e8 |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_e7fd5cdc |
type |
Brain Bleach |
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comment |
Brain Bleach: Supergirl agrees to take a quick look into every building in the city to find a bomb, and sees some things she wishes she hadn't. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_e7fd5cdc |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_e7fd5cdc |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_ea9f0351 |
type |
My Brain is Big |
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comment |
My Brain Is Big: Discussed by The Leader and MODOK. The Leader points out that Dr. Doom is at least as smart as they are, but he has a normal-sized head. He eventually comes to the conclusion that he and MODOK are idiots for allowing their heads to swell to such massive sizes. |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_ea9f0351 |
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type |
Beethoven Was an Alien Spy |
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comment |
Beethoven Was an Alien Spy: Or rather Jesus is a mutant, implied to be Wolverine of all people assuming Cable isn't trolling. |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_ec7da60a |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_eef90616 |
type |
Bread, Eggs, Milk, Squick |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_eef90616 |
comment |
Bread, Eggs, Milk, Squick: One text is a conversation between Bucky Barnes and Sam Wilson. Sam invites Bucky to a therapy session for people who were snapped out of existence and came back five years later. Bucky declines because he's already gotten used to it due to Hydra unfreezing him for a task him every few years. When Sam asks if Bucky has any advice, Bucky tells him: 1) just smile and nod when people talk to you about pop culture stuff. 2) Don't bother to update your wardrobe because fashion is cyclical. and 3) Kill whoever you're told to kill. Bucky then concludes that maybe therapy isn't such a bad idea. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_eef90616 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_eef90616 |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_ef20dac5 |
type |
Servile Snarker |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_ef20dac5 |
comment |
Servile Snarker: Alfred puts it quite nicely... |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_ef20dac5 |
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1.0 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_ef20dac5 |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_eff83d77 |
type |
Mundane Utility |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_eff83d77 |
comment |
Mundane Utility: Spider-Man uses his webbing to make hammocks. Black Lightning uses his electric powers to power his own house. Villainous example—Ra's al Ghul uses the Lazarus Pit for reviving dead plants and even turkeys. Magneto requests for Professor X to psychoanalyze some teammates, whilst Charles asks him to assist with MRIs for his. Barry Allen gets a job wrapping Christmas presents at a mall. Downside, he does it so fast he sends a few through time. Upside, Iris got an iPhone 9 years in advance. |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_eff83d77 |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f2e13990 |
type |
AintNoRule |
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comment |
Ain't No Rule: As Vulture notes, there ain't no real law against stealing people's youth. |
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1.0 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f2e13990 |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f332d990 |
type |
Too Much Information |
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comment |
Too Much Information: Batman texts "Do you bleed?" to Supergirl rather than her cousin by mistake. She retorts that yes, she does, ever since she was 14, and he shouldn't call her. Batman immediately concedes. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f332d990 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f332d990 |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f5b7b990 |
type |
Verbal Backspace |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f5b7b990 |
comment |
Verbal Backspace: Tony gives Steve an online dating profile. Ghost Rider does this while talking about a Halloween party invitation Iron Man has given him. |
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1.0 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f5b7b990 |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f609fcfe |
type |
Fictional Holiday |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f609fcfe |
comment |
Fictional Holiday: This conversation between the Guardians of the Galaxy contains some alien examples of weird holidays. One of them isn't even real and was just made-up as an excuse to eat garbage. |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f609fcfe |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f93d8d52 |
type |
Girlfriend in Canada |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f93d8d52 |
comment |
Girlfriend in Canada: Odin thinks Thor is using this as a cover◊ for secretly being gay. |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f93d8d52 |
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1.0 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_f93d8d52 |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_fb1fb07f |
type |
Doomy Dooms of Doom |
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comment |
Doomy Dooms of Doom: Lex Luthor apparently thinks he's a hero, despite the fact that, as Joker points out, the name of the team he leads isn't exactly noble◊. |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_fb1fb07f |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_fd86da63 |
type |
Crisis of Faith |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_fd86da63 |
comment |
Crisis of Faith: Daredevil asks Doctor Strange if God is real. Strange casually confirms that He is, and so is the Devil. "I fought him a few times. He's a real jerk." |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_fd86da63 |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_fd86da63 |
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type |
With Friends Like These... |
| | Texts from Superheroes (Blog) / int_fdbd6162 |
comment |
With Friends Like These...: Cap is still a little raw about his fight with Thor◊: |
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1.0 |
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ItemName |
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Texts from Superheroes (Blog) |
