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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)

960 statements
187 feature instances
68 referencing feature instances

All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	type	TVTItem
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	label	All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	page	AllGuardsmenParty
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	comment	There once was a gaming group with an evil GM who spent a weekend playing one of Warhammer 40,000's spin-off RPGs. They rolled up a Imperial Guard regiment, made some characters, and proceeded to suffer Total Party Kill after Total Party Kill, so much so that they were generating new characters in between rounds of combat. At the end of this brutal introductory campaign, the surviving fifty Guardsmen found their evac shuttle redirected to an unfamiliar spaceship, where some intimidating soldiers informed them that they were now working for the Inquisition.In other words, a bunch of ragtag, trigger-happy grunts from an Only War campaign wound up playing Dark Heresy, a game ostensibly about clandestine efforts to thwart the enemies of mankind. Hilarity, and Awesome, Ensues.This dramatized After-Action Report chronicles an All Guardsmen Party's adventures as they're loaned out to their boss' Interrogators like PokÃ©mon to newbie Trainers, serving as Dumb Muscle and Cannon Fodder for the Inquisition's best and brightest (and worst, and dumbest). Despite all expectations, the Guardsmen keep rising to the challenge, dealing with intrigue and subterfuge the Imperial Guard way - which is to say, lots of shooting and explosives, and occasional activity of a legally-dubious nature. Whether the job is finding missing psykers, figuring out what's going on with a misbehaving Imperial Guard regiment, purchasing a new mission ship, training a new batch of agents, or acquiring a dangerous xenos specimen, the All Guardsmen Party will find a way to succeed, though not always in the way their bosses would expect or prefer.The series can be read here on 1d4chan, or at the author's personal archive site. There are also some shorts: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5], [6].Tropes experienced by the All Guardsmen Party include:
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	fetched	2024-03-02T00:16:34Z
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	parsed	2024-03-02T00:16:34Z
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_101500e	type	Beneath Notice
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_101500e	comment	Beneath Notice: The Occurrence Border is a ludicrously crappy ship, which actually makes it a perfect mission ship. Nobody would suspect an Inquisition agent would willingly board such a ship unless they were purging it. The Guardsmen themselves are considered a non-threat by the Conspiracy because they're obviously morons. Oak exploits this belief by giving the Guardsmen important roles in his Long Game.
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_101500e	featureApplicability	1.0
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_11734fc0	type	Mission Control Is Off Its Meds
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_11734fc0	comment	Mission Control Is Off Its Meds: While Sciscitat is particularly belligerent and hostile to the party, regularly witholding information and calling them idiots, he at least gives them solid directions and orders. His orthodox Techpriest, on the other hand, vehemently hates the Guardsmen for all the tech-heresy he caught them doing and refuses to aid them in any way. When his Inquisitor orders him to direct the Guardsmen through a sewer network in "The "Stealth" Mission", the Techpriest deliberately commands them to go through every single dangerous area he can, culminating in him trying to get the party to invade a mutant village with 70 or so inhabitants... when there's a perfectly good side passage that circumvents the village (albeit one that's a holy Mechanicus space). His overt attempt to get Sarge killed by las-turrets he's supposed to shut off (by telling Sarge they're offline when they're not) is the final straw for the party, resulting in his "death by enemy ambush" at the mission's end.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_11cdfcf7	type	Chunky Salsa Rule
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_11cdfcf7	comment	Chunky Salsa Rule: The Guardsmen have a standard response when dealing with daemons or similar beings: if destroying the head and other organs is insufficient to stop an enemy, reducing its entire body to chunky salsa with explosives should at least slow it down.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_1237828f	type	Anyone Can Die
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_1237828f	comment	Anyone Can Die: As expected of the setting, friendly NPCs can and will frequently drop like flies, often rather abruptly and unceremoniously. Besides NPC allies, three PC guardsmen have bitten the dust so far. In order of untimely demise: Heavy, who was blown away by an enemy psyker after they and a friendly psyker swapped minds. Crisp, who had Twitch attach all of his remote explosives to his flamethrower tank to blow up a Chaos Marinenote implied to have been an Alpha Legionnaire holding the squad at bolter-point. Cutter, who ingested a lethal amount of combat stimulants, led a melee charge against two Iron Warriors and a Heretek, and went up in flames when said Heretek self-immolated after Cutter had vertically bisected him. This was especially prevalent in the prologue, "Darwinian Character Creation", where characters died so suddenly and so often that the players had to start rolling up new characters in between combat turns to keep up. After six consecutive days of this, the players' regiment is reduced to about thirty people. These survivors make up the main cast of TAGP.
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_1237828f	featureApplicability	1.0
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_170128e9	type	Right Behind Me
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_170128e9	comment	Right Behind Me: Tink goes on a rant about Sarge and the Inquisition; he is interrupted by Sarge's hand on his shoulder.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_17501df2	type	Cool Old Guy
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_17501df2	comment	Cool Old Guy: The feisty elderly adept from Heretic Purging, who (among other things) gets the team and their weapons through a checkpoint by trying to seduce the guards.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_1777688d	type	Genre Savvy
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_1777688d	comment	This is downplayed after the swap to Dark Heresy, thanks to the player's aforementioned Genre-savviness, and a judicious use of Mauve Shirt NPCs to maintain the deadly atmosphere without killing PCs too often. Of course, player characters do die, whether the result of dumb luck or the party having no other options.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_18bf4326	type	Anti-Magic
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_18bf4326	comment	Bane Johns, the one thing in the galaxy the party won't try and shoot, because they know it won't work. At least until the Team gets their hands on an Untouchable to nullify his probability-altering psychic powers, at which point Sarge lays a legendary beat down on him.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_192ba729	type	Older Is Better
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_192ba729	comment	Older Is Better: In the last part of The "Stealth" Mission, in order to overcome Bane Johns' probability manipulation powers, Tink equips the team with the most reliable lasguns on the planet that they could scrounge up. Because it's 40k, the team suspects—almost certainly correctly—they're all older than the human settlement on the planet itself. The only one whose serial number hasn't been worn off with age is Sarge's, all but revealing that, of a type of weapon that likely has trillions of copies in circulation in the galaxy, it was the seventh of its kind ever made on the forge world of Mars.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_1a8dc238	type	Underestimating Badassery
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_1a8dc238	comment	Underestimating Badassery: The Conspiracy doesn't consider the Guardsmen important, so it ignores them entirely. The two members to realize they are a potential threat either die before they can warn their superiors or insist it is all blind luck.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_1c445e86	type	Poor Communication Kills
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_1c445e86	comment	Poor Communication Kills: A Space Marine Scout informs the Guardsmen that a Tyranid Assault Flier is headed their way, expecting them to stand their ground and shoot it down like Space Marines would. Unfortunately, because he didn't say what to do, the Guardsmen naturally take cover and the Scout is taken out shortly after by said Flier. The Interrogators sent to relay orders to the team in "Interlude: Escape" and "Inquisitorial Penal Legion" both fail to explain themselves quickly and plainly enough for the Guardsmen to realize they're an ally. One ends up missing limbs from a trap while the other gets sent off for the duty the Guardsmen needed to be on. The Guardsmen need to replace a set of evidence boxes covering their crimes with a set prepared by Oak. Nubby asks Sarge what to do with a piece of fancy tech in the first set; Sarge tells him they're taking everything. Only after they're offworld does Sarge discover Nubby had been referring to the daemon trap that was supposed to be left in Oak's boxes.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_21e5b9c7	type	Failed a Spot Check
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_21e5b9c7	comment	Failed a Spot Check: All the Guardsmen are prone to this occasionally, such as when they fail to notice that the Zoanthrope they are transporting in Tyranid Delivery Experts is possessed by a daemon for several weeks... or that having an obviously daemonic portal linking into its secure anti-psychic cell from another point in the ship is a bad thing. Doc is the most prone to this, however, such as when he is so absorbed with his patients in a plague ward (and fawning over his Soroitas hospitallier girlfriend) that he doesn't notice that said plague ward is rapidly becoming a hotspot for Nurgle cultists. The fact that his patients are often infected with several instantly-fatal diseases at the same time, or the fact that treating those diseases tended to leave said patients in a worse state than before, or the fact he knew there is a Nurgle cult operating somewhere on the planet, goes completely over his head until Sarge literally smacks some sense into him.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_222dc873	type	Black Comedy
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_222dc873	comment	Black Comedy: Many of the situations that the party faces would be outright horrifying if not born out of or further exacerbated by their own incompetence. Many of the victims of their collateral damage who don't get killed end up traumatized by the events. The only levity is how ridiculous these situations are.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_223ad813	type	Clue, Evidence, and a Smoking Gun
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_223ad813	comment	Clue, Evidence, and a Smoking Gun: The party on how they knew something was odd about the mostly naked woman they come across.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_24321e44	type	Only Sane Man
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_24321e44	comment	Only Sane Man: Sarge is basically this for the Guardsmen. The Guardsmen collectively are this for whatever random Interrogator they're assigned to.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_25597823	type	Personalized Afterlife
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_25597823	comment	Personalized Afterlife: The Guardsmen seem to have their very own afterlife where members and acquaintances spend eternity playing poker and duking it out in a fighting ring. The dead scout marine is pissed he got stuck there.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_26ac510e	type	Mythology Gag
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_26ac510e	comment	Mythology Gag: In Good Soldiers, Bad Educators, the Party acquires some assorted reading material for their trainees, and Doc gets hooked on The Spheres of Longing: A drunken Commissar riding a hover pallet while waving an empty booze bottle orders the people moving him to "Push me closer, I want to hit them with my bottle!"
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_294ed981	type	Bilingual Bonus
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_294ed981	comment	Bilingual Bonus: The named Space Marines in Tyranid Acquisition Experts are named Rubram, Gravis, and Rebus - loosely translated from Latin into "Red", "Serious" and "Matters", or more colloquially, "Ruddy Serious Business". With the expectation that the shuttle pilot would be used, he was named Tunicae - so that the Marines (Gravis and Rebus) meant "Serious Business", and the Scouts (Rubram and Tunicae) meant "Red Shirt."
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_2ae29c0d	type	The Dreaded
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_2ae29c0d	comment	The Dreaded: Bane Johns, the one thing in the galaxy the party won't try and shoot, because they know it won't work. At least until the Team gets their hands on an Untouchable to nullify his probability-altering psychic powers, at which point Sarge lays a legendary beat down on him. When Bane returns in The Stealth Mission, the local planetary authorities, as well as the previous Inquisition agent to inspect the planet, assume he's a daemonhost. As it happens, they're not entirely wrong about that.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_2b706ca	type	More Dakka
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_2b706ca	comment	More Dakka: The Guardsmen are firm believers in solving problems by shooting them with extreme prejudice, and the more firepower they can bring to bear, the better. Heavy, Tink and Twitch are the usual suspects.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_2c7dc9c6	type	No One Should Survive That!
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_2c7dc9c6	comment	Doc is the most prone to this, however, such as when he is so absorbed with his patients in a plague ward (and fawning over his Soroitas hospitallier girlfriend) that he doesn't notice that said plague ward is rapidly becoming a hotspot for Nurgle cultists. The fact that his patients are often infected with several instantly-fatal diseases at the same time, or the fact that treating those diseases tended to leave said patients in a worse state than before, or the fact he knew there is a Nurgle cult operating somewhere on the planet, goes completely over his head until Sarge literally smacks some sense into him.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_303079ba	type	Phallic Weapon
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_303079ba	comment	Phallic Weapon: An Eldar bonesinger's modification to the Guardsmen's black market wraithbone is interrupted, leaving it looking decidedly phallic. The Guardsmen giggle and proceed to rig it to Spot in the most suggestive position possible.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_30e6200f	type	Missing Steps Plan
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_30e6200f	comment	Missing Steps Plan: During one particularly intense hilltop battle on a world being fought over by Orks and Tyranids, Sarge's plan to deal with a Hive Tyrant amounts to ordering the squad to "HANDLE IT!". The squad does not appear to be willing to permit him to live that down, and have in fact used the line verbatim on each other.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_3126c34a	type	Insufferable Genius
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_3126c34a	comment	Insufferable Genius: Their second Interrogator is a complete ass but also incredibly skilled when it comes to information analysis. Oak himself muses it's incredible that he can be so good at his job and yet be so bad at handling people
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_31a2a33c	type	Stuff Blowing Up
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_31a2a33c	comment	Stuff Blowing Up: The usual stock in trade of Twitch, the squad's demo specialist. The Guardsmen are very fond of this as a means of solving problems, including up to the occasional orbital strike.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_31d55275	type	Tuxedo and Martini
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_31d55275	comment	During The "Stealth" Mission, the Guardsmen learn that a Chaos artifact held by a high-level crimelord, who would normally try and keep it a secret, is the prize of a high-stakes poker game. Their associated interrogators leap at the opportunity to participate until the lead inquisitor (up in orbit) bawls them out for their stupidity. Why the plot suddenly became the setup to a Bond film is not a property of the artifact itself, but rather Bane Johns, the Interplanetary Man of Mystery.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_34dcfc96	type	Kick the Dog
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_34dcfc96	comment	Kick the Dog: The first session ended with nearly an entire unit being wiped out, save for a single survivor who retreated. The GM started the next session with the execution of said survivor for desertion before sending the players back into the same trenches.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_35e4fe72	type	Fakin' MacGuffin
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_35e4fe72	comment	Fakin' MacGuffin: During "The "Stealth" Mission" the Guardsmen are assigned to recover a set of Chaos artifacts stored in chests. The artifacts are completely unimportant, it's the chests themselves which Oak needs.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_362bdb30	type	Out-Gambitted
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_362bdb30	comment	Out-Gambitted: The party manages this against an Eldar Warlock when they stick a detpack to his spirit stone.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_36dc1dea	type	OverlyPreparedGag
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_36dc1dea	comment	Overly Prepared Gag: The team discovers that all of their missions were actually planned to acquire a series of items used to build a teseract daemon prison. As Shoggy admitted, the entire campaign was essentially a joke whose punchline was them building a Master Ball for PokÃ©mon Professor Oak.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_397f480b	type	Spy School
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_397f480b	comment	Spy School: Oak's fleet collects personnel from throughout the Imperium to be trained as Inquisition teams. Those teams are then assigned to Interrogators who need experience leading missions before they can graduate to Inquisitor. Unfortunately, the Interrogators are a range of rejects from other Inquisitors who Oak has to try and straighten out.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_39b8d3d6	type	Boring, but Practical
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_39b8d3d6	comment	Boring, but Practical: After the field mission fiasco in "Good Soliders, Bad Educators", the Guardsmen give up trying to teach the trainees to be "proper inquisition goons", and settle for infantrymen instead. The skills and techniques they show them like formation fighting and squad tactics are far from spectacular or the type of stuff an elite agent might need, but prove very useful nonetheless. In general, this is the Squad's default solution to any problem. Their M.O. can be summed up as "Apply las fire and explosives to any problem until it stops being a problem."
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_3aec9e5e	type	Properly Paranoid
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_3aec9e5e	comment	Properly Paranoid: The Guardsmens' shared paranoia has saved them a great many times. It's shown to great effect in The Xenotech Heresy: the Guardsmen's paranoia allows them to counter the machinations of the Eldar and Mechanicus. After the events of Discount Spaceship, the party has a unanimous paranoid hatred of servitors, declaring them daemon-possessed spies at the drop of a bolter shell and commissioning Twitch to make overkill anti-servitor traps for their barracks. It turns out that the Mechanicus is indeed attempting to spy on the group with cleaning servitors during The Xenotech Heresy, only failing because the party kills them all with extreme prejudice. Twitch, the explosives expert, is a full-on paranoid wreck, especially when Orks are involved (as they triggered his paranoia in the first place due to a Kommando raid). This gets to the point of having short-fuse grenades taped to the inside of a top-of-the-line security door, setting up redundant detonators, keeping shaped charges on his back-plate to keep people from sneaking up on him, and booby-trapping his own weapons (when Twitch says not to touch his stuff, it's for your safety). This would normally make him a bit too paranoid, but each time this comes up it saves the rest of the team. According to Shoggy, the DM allows Twitch's player to roll for paranoia and leaks him spoilers based on how well he does, which the other players are only privy to through Twitch's in-character interpretation. Consequently, the revelations that the mystery box was "full of Orks" and the Tyrannid "ghosts" were caused by the comatose Zoanthrope becoming possessed by a Daemon resulted in "I told you so" moments.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_3bb81225	type	Recurring Boss
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_3bb81225	comment	Recurring Boss: The daemon the Guardsmen first encounter in "Discount Spaceship" is incredibly persistent. Over the course of their adventures it has manifested as a daemonhost through a psyker child, a knarloc, a daemoni-servi-knarlo-titan, a techpriest, a zoanthrope, and Bane John's. This is implied to be the same daemon that Inquisitor Quercus, aka Oak, has been fighting for 300 years.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_3cb1d38d	type	Bad Boss
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_3cb1d38d	comment	Bad Boss: Most of the Interrogators qualify, some more than others. The Rupert is collectively agreed to be the least bad boss the Guardsmen have hadnote he's polite, well-connected (literally anybody important is an "old family friend" of his) and pretty competent, but also dangerously naive and sees no issue with charging things head-on. Bane Johns and Angelica Dominicus (aka "The Bitch") are definitely the worst. After the events of The Interplanetary Man of Mystery Sarge is finally "persuaded" to accept a promotion to Interrogator to keep the Guardsmen from any more bad bosses.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_3ebc57ac	type	Going Native
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_3ebc57ac	comment	Going Native: The adventure in Tau space features a former Ordos Xenos Inquisitor who has adapted a number of Tau customs, has become a Tau sympathizer and promotes its "superior" values, and is heavily hinted to be the villain behind it all. He remains loyal to the Imperium, he just doesn't want his part of the galaxy to be engulfed in war.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_3f0b2f50	type	Make It Look Like an Accident
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_3f0b2f50	comment	Make It Look Like an Accident: Sciscitat gathers up as many of the Conspiracy's agents, along with any other traitors or sympathizers he could find, and loads them on a single ship sent back to Inquisitorial Headquarters. To ensure Oak's enemies couldn't free them, the ship was unfortunately lost in a warp storm on the way.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_407d3e6d	type	Morton's Fork
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_407d3e6d	comment	Morton's Fork: After getting her involuntary skunk stripe, Aimy proceeded to ask every tech acolyte she meets afterward if her hair looks funny and then does "mean things" if they answer wrong. As the narrator notes, there's no right answer.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_411a35bd	type	Body Surf
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_411a35bd	comment	Body Surf: The demon described in Interlude: Escape seems to use this method. Every time Oak kills its host, it possesses one of Oak's colleagues and starts the plan over again.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_43a46119	type	Surrounded by Idiots
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_43a46119	comment	Surrounded by Idiots: Inquisitor Oak admits that his direct subordinates consist mainly of psychopaths, incompetents, and glory seekers whose previous bosses never set them straight. The reason he takes them on is to try and reform them into proper Inquisition agents.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_464dd7cc	type	The Unfought
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_464dd7cc	comment	The Unfought: Shoggy indicates their GM had planned for the Guardsmen to fight Bane Johns as the final boss of "The Interplanetary Man of Mystery". The players manage to talk their way out of the fight, much to the GM's annoyance. So he brought Bane back during "The "Stealth" Mission".
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_48abd4cb	type	Can Only Move the Eyes
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_48abd4cb	comment	Can Only Move the Eyes: Interrogator Angelica Dominicus, AKA The Bitch, AKA Nubby's girlfriend is paralyzed so she can only move her eyes so she can be safely transported to the Inquisition for questioning. Along the voyage, Doc decides to pass the time by teaching her how to communicate by in Morse code by blinking. He succeeds, but all she says is "Kill me". Spending weeks of Warp travel alone with Nubby Nubbs will do that to you.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_48b9731f	type	Paper-Thin Disguise
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_48b9731f	comment	Paper-Thin Disguise: Bane Johns disguises himself as a deserting Guardsmen by throwing on a greatcoat and impressive false mustache. He still fails to hide his obviously Inquisition-issue armor, pistols, and Inquisitorial rosette. When Sarge straightens him out, Bane pulls the rosette out and leaves it in plain view. Tink sticks a bunch of grox skins and other assorted skulls on his Tau drone to disguise it as a servoskull. The illustration near the end of "Xenotech Heresy" depicts it as having a human skull duct-taped on top, a human jaw hanging on wires below, and two scrolls; one saying "PLEASE IGNORE" and another saying "COMPLETELY NORMAL SERVITOR SKULL". Later, after Sarge's lasgun is destroyed, Tink tries to disguise a Tau pulse carbine as a lasgun for Sarge. Whenever the guardsmen try to wear disguises, it's described as making them look exactly like guardsmen trying to wear disguises.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_49fb5ccb	type	Combat Pragmatist
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_49fb5ccb	comment	Combat Pragmatist: The party uses every dirty trick in the book and arms themselves with potentially-heretical xenotech and illegally-procured weapons - but if it keeps them alive, they'll use it.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_4c6205c5	type	New Technology Is Evil
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_4c6205c5	comment	New Technology Is Evil: Averted, against the standard beliefs of the Imperium, as of The Greater Good. The party has started gathering and using Tau xenotech disguised with Imperial adornments. They've also tried and failed to steal from both the Eldar and the Necrons, both times being thwarted by an inability to understand the controls.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_4e7c4536	type	Wham Line
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_4e7c4536	comment	Wham Line: In "Tyranid Delivery Experts" there's Fio's comment with regards to a distortion in the Zoanthrope's stasis field: The final sentence of "Tyranid Delivery Experts" is a doozy:
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_4efc4fae	type	Good Scars, Evil Scars
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_4efc4fae	comment	Good Scars, Evil Scars: Twitch accuses Sergeant Gravis of being an Ork in disguise and Doc has him take off his helmet to prove he is human to the panicking Trooper. We never see it, but the scars on his face freak Tink out real bad.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_4f4372e9	type	Early-Installment Weirdness
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_4f4372e9	comment	Early-Installment Weirdness: The first entry and the opening of the second are narrated by the player recounting the events of a tabletop gaming session. It's only after the info dump at the start of "Pilgrims and Heretics" that we are introduced to our in-universe narrator.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_500ecfb7	type	The Big Guy
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_500ecfb7	comment	Heavy, who was blown away by an enemy psyker after they and a friendly psyker swapped minds.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_52488c54	type	Drowning My Sorrows
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_52488c54	comment	Drowning My Sorrows: The Commissar the Guardsmen meet in the training camp was assigned there permanently as a punishment detail. When he's not in a drunken slumber, he's downing more alcohol while bemoaning his lot in life.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5798bfbf	type	Reassigned to Antarctica
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5798bfbf	comment	Reassigned to Antarctica: After an entire army deserted on their watch, the Commissars attached to said army were reassigned to a penal legion training camp. Not to the legion, but to the camp, which means this is where they will spend the rest of their lives with no chance of redeeming themselves. Both go absolutely insane in the process. One becomes a barely functioning alcoholic while the one becomes a petty tyrant trying to do everything he can to be reassigned. The latter one eventually has to be put down by the Guardsman. Sadly for the two of them, they were actually eligible for reassignment 50 years before that, but the bureaucracy lost the paperwork. A junior Commissar from the above detachment ends up helping the Guardsmen escape when they show him they can get him reassigned. The actual post they arrange is an Administratum position that's been open for two centuries in the middle of nowhere, but he's more than happy to get a nice, boring job.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_57b74bd4	type	Achievements in Ignorance
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_57b74bd4	comment	Achievements in Ignorance: The Guardsmen, through a mixture of bad planning, poor prep work, and lack of common sense manage to accidentally create a Tyranid daemon host. A pair of Space Marines call them idiots and heretics on hearing about this because it's supposed to be impossible.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_57b80b45	type	Fantastic Racism
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_57b80b45	comment	Fantastic Racism: Zig-Zagged. This being 40k, hating the Xeno is normal for everyone, but the exceptional circumstances of Inquisitional work lead to the party having much more interaction with aliens than they would otherwise tolerate. The entirety of The Greater Good takes place in an Imperium-Tau neutral zone and causes the party to nearly go on shooting sprees against the mixed population several times. In The Xenotech Heresy the party is forced into a fragile alliance with an Eldar (and have to betray the Eldar multiple times before he betrays them) and actually go out of their way to save and recruit an Earth Caste Tau who had been forced into the whole debacle. There's also a decent amount of this between the Mechanicus and the baseline crew of the Occurrence Border.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_57d43e40	type	Fantasy Counterpart Culture
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_57d43e40	comment	Fantasy Counterpart Culture: While the canon Tau have a vague Asian-Oriental flavor, the neutral border worlds are presented as being more akin to modern day Japan, complete with anime.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5abc8612	type	Unholy Matrimony
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5abc8612	comment	Unholy Matrimony: The paired big bads of "The "Stealth" Mission" are the Bitch and Bane Johns who are in a relationship of sorts.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5b19cc1b	type	Air-Vent Passageway
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5b19cc1b	comment	Air-Vent Passageway: While locked in a conference room aboard a space station, Sarge needs to make an escape and tries to find an air-vent he could fit through. Jim the Techpriest tells this idea is stupid as nobody would design something like that. When Sarge points out the Occurrence Border has vents like that, Jim replies it's because the Border is a very stupid ship.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5beef860	type	Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5beef860	comment	Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: The entire party, and especially Twitch, hate the Orks with a fiery and massively explosive passion. And, when and where they expect the greenskins least, they show up. It's even mentioned in "Tyranid Acquisitions Experts", almost word-for-word.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5c300c3b	type	The Berserker
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5c300c3b	comment	Cutter, who ingested a lethal amount of combat stimulants, led a melee charge against two Iron Warriors and a Heretek, and went up in flames when said Heretek self-immolated after Cutter had vertically bisected him.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5d5cc3fd	type	Through the Eyes of Madness
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5d5cc3fd	comment	Through the Eyes of Madness: After Sarge becomes an Interrogator, we see Twitch's point of view as he goes through one of his episodes. He hears Orks through the walls of a septic pipe and occasionally shoots the wall in a vain attempt to kill them. Of course, the audience knows that there are no Orks.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5db59a03	type	Brown Note
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5db59a03	comment	Brown Note: Looking at the face of the insectoid statue on the Occurrence Border drives humans insane. The engineering staff of the Border threw a tarp over its head, and use its arms to prop up plasma conduits.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5ff30573	type	Long Game
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_5ff30573	comment	The Guardsmen themselves are considered a non-threat by the Conspiracy because they're obviously morons. Oak exploits this belief by giving the Guardsmen important roles in his Long Game.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_608bf5a0	type	Shoot the Hostage
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_608bf5a0	comment	Shoot the Hostage: The Bitch is trapped by the Guardsmen and tries to use a Chaos artifact as a hostage for negotiations, pointing out it will be destroyed if they kill her. Unfortunately for her the Guardsmen are more than happy to destroy said artifact.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_60af5e4	type	Stupidest Thing I've Ever Heard
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_60af5e4	comment	Stupidest Thing I've Ever Heard: The Xenologist's reaction when Sarge confirms he plans to transport a live Tyranid zoanthrope in the Occurrence Border'''s entirely inadequate holding area.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_63557923	type	Death World
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_63557923	comment	Death World: Heretic Purging sees the Gaurdsmen, alongside The Rupert, sent to one of these to cleanse the planet of several Chaos cults. The fact that Deathworlders make for excellent Guard recruits is the only reason the Inquisition doesn't just Exterminatus the planet outright. The Stealth Mission takes place on a desert hive world which the party eventually realizes is even more inhospitable than standard. Not only are pools of strong acid called "lakes", the dust storms frequently escalate to rock-storms ("it stops being sand or dust once it's bigger than a grape") that span entire continents.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_659ef759	type	Implacable Man
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_659ef759	comment	Implacable Man: The ex-Arbite traffic cop the party meets in Jack Hive is nearly impossible to shake and determined to ticket the party for the smallest infractions. He follows them between spires and into the Underhive, appears from nowhere whenever the party has a quiet moment, and papers their entire vehicle in tickets. Even when he ends up knocked out and tied up in the back of an exploding van, he comes out of it apparently no worse for the wear.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_664bb1fd	type	Generic Name
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_664bb1fd	comment	Generic Name: Played for Laughs. The characters' former regiment was the Generian 99th Medium Infantry — listed in Munitorum records as GENER IC.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_6bda9a30	type	Meaningful Name
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_6bda9a30	comment	With the expectation that the shuttle pilot would be used, he was named Tunicae - so that the Marines (Gravis and Rebus) meant "Serious Business", and the Scouts (Rubram and Tunicae) meant "Red Shirt."
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_6d7026fa	type	Punny Name
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_6d7026fa	comment	Punny Name: Ivana Krushyu, which is more or less obligatory given she plays the role of a Bond Girl. Weebu is a fanatic for Tau culture, which in turn is depicted as being very similar to modern Japanese culture. That's right, Weebu is a weeaboo. Space Marines Rubram, Gravis, and Rebus don't seem punny until one considers Latin: Ruddy, serious, and business.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_6ea95fc4	type	Killer Game Master
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_6ea95fc4	comment	Killer Game Master: The GM has his players roll up hundreds of Player Characters during their "prologue" sessions of Only War, and kills or incapacitates nearly all of them over the course of several military campaigns - only 37 members of the regiment are still alive by the end. It gets so bad that the players have to quickly roll up new characters in-between turns. Not for nothing is he described as being "on the 'Hitler scale' of death measurement". By the time the game transitions from Only War to Dark Heresy for the rest of the series, the players (and their characters) have become paranoid, Genre Savvy and hyper-competent out of necessity. This is downplayed after the swap to Dark Heresy, thanks to the player's aforementioned Genre-savviness, and a judicious use of Mauve Shirt NPCs to maintain the deadly atmosphere without killing PCs too often. Of course, player characters do die, whether the result of dumb luck or the party having no other options.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_6fdd991c	type	Overt Operative
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_6fdd991c	comment	Overt Operative: Having trained extensively as soldiers and practically never as spies, the Guardsmen are incredibly obvious whenever they try to blend in with civilians. The team they "educate" ends up much the same. Bane Johns, as a James Bond expy, is even worse, being a party animal who periodically goes on murder sprees that are sometimes vaguely connected to his actual mission. When he returns in "The 'Stealth' Mission", there's a celebrity tabloid dedicated to his antics.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_71038217	type	Wrench Wench
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_71038217	comment	Wrench Wench: In addition to a few female Tech Priests such as Hannah, Tink has a brief relationship with a Tau weapons tech that he seems convinced is a female Tau.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7175e156	type	Traffic Wardens
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7175e156	comment	Traffic Wardens: An Arbites the Guardsmen encounter during the "Stealth" Mission is initially mistaken for a possible enemy spy given his laser-sharp focus on the party. He ends up issuing them several thousand crowns in traffic tickets and sends them to their Inquisitorial trial.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7286e96d	type	Idiot Ball
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7286e96d	comment	Idiot Ball: Nubby takes firm possession of this during the Discount Spaceship chapter - it starts with buying the hunk of junk that is the Occurrence Border (for its relatively very low price just so he can pocket the remaining budget) and escalates from there. His attempt to openly threaten the owner for a further discount on the already cheap ship leads the man to have 6 bombs set on the ship's six Gellar Field generators out of spite, jeopardizing the whole mission even further just because Nubby wanted to twist the guy's arm for fun. His squad is very unimpressed and vow to never let him negotiate for anything important ever again.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_74b6e6d0	type	Dressed to Plunder
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_74b6e6d0	comment	Dressed to Plunder: The previous captain of the Occurrence Border meets the Guardsmen while wearing every stereotypical bit of Rogue Trader costume he can wear without replacing a limb or eye with an augmetic. The fact that he is roughly spherical and obviously not a Rogue Trader just makes this look silly.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_74d10a21	type	Jerkass Has a Point
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_74d10a21	comment	Jerk Ass Has A Point: In Tyranid Delivery Experts, the Occurrence Border's Navigator points out that the approaching Navy vessels probably believe there is a genestealer cult on their ship... since they de-warped on the far edge of the system, and are radiating Tyranid psychic energy from the captive Zoanthrope. While no one enjoys his insults they can't deny he's right.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7c48b272	type	Summon Bigger Fish
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7c48b272	comment	Summon Bigger Fish: At one point, the Guardsmen end up luring a Chaos-possessed servitor-Titan into combat with a hungry and pissed off Knarloc. Doesn't quite work as planned, see Nice Job Breaking It, Hero above.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7d4a47d1	type	Let Us Never Speak of This Again
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7d4a47d1	comment	Let Us Never Speak of This Again: After dosing Ivana with way too many stimulants results in her killing Bane with a cry of "Blood for the Blood God" before disappearing into the Warp, the Guardsmen decide they didn't see anything.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7d561d58	type	Too Awesome to Use
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7d561d58	comment	Too Awesome to Use: Inverted in The Xenotech Heresy when the team is given a small nuclear bomb to complete their mission and decide that it must be used, even if a better solution appears.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7eb73553	type	Bullying a Dragon
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7eb73553	comment	Bullying a Dragon: A Techpriest actively harasses and sabotages the Guardsmen, frequently leading them into danger on purpose and nearly ruining the entire mission, out of sheer pettiness and spite. Only as the squad of seasoned Guardsmen with a fresh grudge and a "convenient" alibi are beating him (a lone Techpriest) to death does the Techpriest realize that this might have been a bad idea.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7fbb13bf	type	Unfriendly Fire
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7fbb13bf	comment	Unfriendly Fire: During Good Soldiers, Bad Educators a Commissar cadet guns down a fleeing trainee only to be shot dead when he tries to kill another. The shooter is unidentified and the Guardsmen are sure it is the fault of a Gretchin which stabbed his corpse repeatedly with a stolen Imperium-issue knife. The "Stealth" Mission has an orthodox techpriest who repeatedly screws the party over and nearly gets them killed when acting as mission control. He falls victim to an "enemy ambush" shortly afterward. The Penal Legion reveal the students from the Guardsmen's training days learned it may be necessary to kill superior officers if they're actively endangering the squad. They did not learn how to cover up said killing before trying it, hence their reassignment to a penal legion.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7fbb2a3	type	Nice Job Breaking It, Hero!
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_7fbb2a3	comment	Nice Job Breaking It, Hero: The result of sending a daemonhost Knarloc to fight a Chaos servitor-Titan-techpriest. What's left of both fuses together, remains Chaos-possessed, and is significantly angrier at the Guardsmen. Trading a Necron flyer to a Rogue Trader. Several worlds are cleansed of life by the Necrons chasing after the flyer, and a schism in the Mechanicus is threatened. And that's before the Hereteks get in on the madness. Successfully delivering a Tyranid zoanthrope as ordered. The unintended collateral damage and confusion caused by the zoanthrope's psychic presence is enough for the Conspiracy to finally get Oak and his subordinates declared rogues.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_81c4faa3	type	Entertainingly Wrong
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_81c4faa3	comment	Entertainingly Wrong: Due to a fundamental misunderstanding of how a Space Marine's geneseed works, the T'au think it can be planted in any old human and it'll turn them into a clone of the dead Marine. This is used in one episode of Super Deserter Gues'eva Action Heroes to bring back their Marine comrade. When Tink suggested "planting Gravis' seeds in a servitor" to fix him, Doc is gobsmacked that he's so off-base about it (and that he takes Xenos "heretical cartoons" at face value).
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_83641c73	type	Logical Weakness
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_83641c73	comment	Logical Weakness: Bane Johns' luck manipulation keeps him safe by draining the luck of anyone nearby, rendering him effectively invulnerable. However, this is automatically caused by Bane's psyker nature on all threats within the power's radius and he's untrained due to never being identified as a psyker. The Guardsmen (once they realize what's happening) stay out of his power's range and simultaneously concentrate all their firepower on him, since no psyker's powers are unlimited and overuse typically causes Very Bad Things to happen to them. Every single shot at Bane might miss or ricochet and every grenade becomes a dud, but hundreds of shots and dozens of grenades (with no source of luck to leech from) eventually causes Bane's powers to fade out and leave him open.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_83fb6177	type	First-Episode Twist
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_83fb6177	comment	First-Episode Twist: The players aren't playing Only War anymore, they're playing Dark Heresy.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8514979	type	Give Chase with Angry Natives
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8514979	comment	Give Chase with Angry Natives: The traffic cop in "The "Stealth" Mission" starts following the Guardsmen to issue them even more citations. Having a police escort makes it hard to be inconspicuous, so they eventually run a few laps through the middle of a gunfight between some Hive gangs. Their van only takes a few incidental hits; the cop on the other hand gets deliberately shot down and swarmed by kids with pipes. He is very pissed the next time he shows up.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_87646020	type	Memory Gambit
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_87646020	comment	Memory Gambit: Inquisitor Oak has deliberately wiped parts of his memory and stored them in an external cogitator so the psykers employed by his enemy can't see his entire plan. This does however cause him to sometimes make mistakes like delivering the weapon built to capture the daemon to some of his less reliable subordinates including the Guardsmen.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_884e513b	type	Medium Awareness
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_884e513b	comment	Medium Awareness: After the first chapter and a half, the origin of the series as a Dark Heresy campaign is generally ignored. But an occasional line is thrown in. For example, the narrator points out that fighting in vacuum and zero-G felt like the party had lost exactly 10% of their ballistic skills, and capitalizes the word "Obsession" (also a gaming term) while describing Aimy and Twitch.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8879db82	type	Badass Crew
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8879db82	comment	Badass Crew: The Guardsmen as a whole. Reasonably, given their shared background.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_88ebc539	type	Always a Bigger Fish
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_88ebc539	comment	Always a Bigger Fish: The Occurrence Border has a kroot infestation due to a previous captain's bad decision, with the tribals and Guardsmen having to periodically cull their numbers. Eventually they're cleared out, but only because the new squig infestation ate all of the kroot.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_88f4f763	type	Stolen MacGuffin Reveal
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_88f4f763	comment	Stolen Macguffin Reveal: One of Nubby's few skills, particularly useful when he swipes a necessary Inquisitorial rosette from Angelica while she's cutting his legs off.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8a6d2168	type	Beat Them at Their Own Game
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8a6d2168	comment	Beat Them at Their Own Game: Oak's school was originally proposed by his rival, who he has fought multiple times while preventing its establishment. Eventually, he decided to found the thing himself just so his rival wouldn't have the opportunity.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8a83cabc	type	Captured on Purpose
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8a83cabc	comment	Captured on Purpose: Bane Johns orders the Guardsmen to stand down and let themselves be captured. This puts them in the perfect position to attack the heads of the local conspiracy. The betrayal and capture of the Guardsmen at the end of The "Stealth" Mission is actually a plan by Inquisitor Oak to get his people into enemy-controlled territory for a vital mission. Amusingly, the Guardsmen almost ruin this plan by escaping the Arbites ship transporting them to the Inquisition. If they hadn't randomly picked Oak's ship to steal and escape in, the plan would have fallen apart completely.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8a8c7344	type	Plasma Cannon
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8a8c7344	comment	Plasma Cannon: Tink's weapon of choice. Also; some party members get Tau pulse rifles disguised as lasguns.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8b606a51	type	There Is No Kill Like Overkill
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8b606a51	comment	There Is No Kill Like Overkill: The Guardsmen's go-to solution for dealing with hostiles.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8c431fe4	type	Band of Brothers
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8c431fe4	comment	Band of Brothers: The Guardsmen certainly view themselves as this. The rest of their teams, not so much. They do eventually expand this to include the more reliable and pleasant teammates they've had, such as Jim and Hannah (deemed "the broest of cogbroes" and taught how to think like proper Guardsmen), Fumbles for saving them and trying his best, Aimy (who was already a Guardswoman to begin with, just a noble one from a different regiment), and Fio.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8d189cee	type	Nothing Can Stop Us Now!
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8d189cee	comment	Nothing Can Stop Us Now!: Invoked in-universe. The Guardsmen need their enemy Bane Johns to attack them in a warehouse... so they have Sarge declare "Not Even Bane Johns Could Stop Us Now". He immediately bursts in through a skylight.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8ef5ae81	type	Lethally Stupid
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8ef5ae81	comment	Lethally Stupid: Bane Johns is a massive danger to his subordinates as a result of this trope, blithely wandering into extremely dangerous situations. And while his high luck lets him walk away, it also means his subordinates don't.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8f900ccd	type	Overly Long Name
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_8f900ccd	comment	Averted by Aimy, whose name is eventually revealed to be a contraction of her Overly Long Name, Amelia Delorisista Amanita Trigestrata Zeldana Malifee von Humpeding.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_906365a2	type	Demonic Possession
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_906365a2	comment	Demonic Possession: During Interlude: Escape Oak explains that he has spent most of his career fighting a demon who possesses Oak's current colleague every time he manages to kill the last host. Thanks to this, it has now worked its way deep into the Inquisition.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_90b66e22	type	Femme Fatale
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_90b66e22	comment	Femme Fatale: The female Interrogator in "Nubby's Girlfriend" betrays the team in the middle of a mission.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_91697559	type	Half the Man He Used to Be
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_91697559	comment	Half the Man He Used to Be: Nubby loses both legs to a swipe from a forcesword and has them replaced with augmetics. Sergeant Gravis gets bisected through the lungs by a Hive Tyrant's bonesword. He survives. A few enemies get this treatment including a Khonate mutant that gets bisected by Cutter as well as the Heretek that takes down Cutter when the latter beats him in melee.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_95265081	type	Leeroy Jenkins
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_95265081	comment	In the same episode, Cutter and the Rupert decide that the best way to engage a distracted Ork firing line from behind is to charge in screaming with sword upraised. Alfred and the rest of the Squad manage to keep them from getting killed, but it was a close thing.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_973d220f	type	Never My Fault
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_973d220f	comment	Never My Fault: Interrogator Sciscitat blames every problem in his operations on the Guardsmen and treats himself and his favorite bootlickers as completely blameless. This becomes especially galling in his second appearance when one of his subordinates actively sabotages the Guardsmen and the Interrogator chews the Guardsmen out for messing things up. In the same mission he also deliberately refused to share any details with the Guardsmen beyond their immediate objective and then gets angry when they don't act based on critical information he didn't give them.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_97926168	type	Rewatch Bonus
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_97926168	comment	Rewatch Bonus: Reread "What's In The Box?" after finding out what's in the box, and all the clues will be obvious in retrospect. Reread "Heretic Purging" after finding out Crisp had joined a death cult, and all of his behavior suddenly makes a lot more sense. The entire series makes much more sense after "Escape" interlude, where Oak explains that he founded the school specifically to handle the worst Interrogators and turn them into better Inquisitors.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_9c1f758a	type	Kill It with Fire
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_9c1f758a	comment	Kill It with Fire: Exaggerated, even for a 40K fic. The crew of the Occurrence Border has on at least one occasion dealt with a Warp-corrupted portion of the ship by selectively lowering void shields and melting the offending portion off in a sun. Considering that the entire front end of the ship (where the bow used to be) is obviously melted over, nobody questions Old Bill if this is true.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_9f80e1da	type	Sarcasm Mode
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_9f80e1da	comment	Sarcasm Mode: "The 'Stealth' Mission" has the extra quote marks to indicate just how stealthy the mission ends up being.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a01f88a7	type	General Failure
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a01f88a7	comment	General Failure: The commanding officers in "Heretics and Pilgrims" all managed a shade of this. The Interrogator gets himself thrown in the brig after he repeatedly insults a ship's captain. His subordinates then take control of a lightly armed mob and send them into a fortified kill zone, getting them slaughtered and triggering daemonic summoning rituals. Bane Johns may get the job done stylishly, but during the post-mission discussion with Sarge it's revealed he has gotten thirty squads of agents killed to the last man. He succeeds in his mission every time, sure, but there's literally no other survivors when he's done; the whole point of Oak's initiative is to get surviving Inquisitorial teams up and running.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a1b141f4	type	My God, What Have I Done?
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a1b141f4	comment	My God, What Have I Done?: When Doc runs away from a Flyrant, letting Sergeant Gravis get bisected (two thirds of the Inquisitorial Council ruled in his favor saying that his continuous shooting was an attempt to distract the Flyrant), the DM makes a roll and decides that Doc got an obsession with keeping the Marine alive. This manifests in the story as Doc becoming utterly determined in keeping the Marine alive until he got full medical treatment. (Though he does eventually lose the Marine's legs.) Gravis lives long enough to get put into a Dreadnaught.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a6c69bd	type	MacGuffin
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a6c69bd	comment	MacGuffin: The titular Box of "What's In The Box?" was the driving force for all parties involved. The soldiers wanted the Box for its weapons, the techpriests thought it was holy, the Commissariat thought it needed to be destroyed, and the Inquisition wanted to know what it was. "Good Soldiers, Bad Educators" featured a fight with various groups for control of a Necron spaceship and its cargo. The Guardsmen return the latter to Oak and never hear anything else about it. "The Xenotech Heresy" focuses on a piece of xenotech which the Mechanicus, Dark Mechanicus, Eldar, Necrons, and human nobles are trying to control. The Guardsmen don't even know what it's the same Necron ship until near the end of the mission. "The "Stealth" Mission" deals with a race between the Guardsmen and Bane and the Bitch for possession of a set of Chaos artifacts. Turns out the artifacts are just misdirection for the real MacGuffins.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a7850fbf	type	Only Known by Their Nickname
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a7850fbf	comment	Only Known by Their Nickname: The Guardsmen are all known only by their nicknames - Sarge, Doc, Heavy, Cutter, Nubby, Twitch, Tink. Eventually Sarge's name is revealed - it's Greg Sargent. There's also one unnamed Interrogator, later an Inquisitor, who's only known as "the Rupert", and his batman, who is christened "Alfred" by the party. And then the Inquisitor who's their boss, who's only referred to as Professor Oak. His real name is eventually revealed by the diplomacy adept to be Quercus, which means... Oak. Meanwhile his personal Interrogator is named Ulmus which means... Elm, but they just call him "Interrogator with the dataslate". Averted by Aimy, whose name is eventually revealed to be a contraction of her Overly Long Name, Amelia Delorisista Amanita Trigestrata Zeldana Malifee von Humpeding.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a7e47a11	type	Your Approval Fills Me with Shame
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a7e47a11	comment	Your Approval Fills Me with Shame: The team is NOT happy when the Tau praise their efforts for taking down their corrupt politician. It is left ambiguous whether or not the politician was acting on behalf of the government and was sold out when his plans were revealed or if he was a real traitor. Whatever the case, the Guardsman are disgusted with the idea of being praised by filthy aliens.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a8a04f6f	type	And I Must Scream
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a8a04f6f	comment	And I Must Scream: The fate of Angelica Dominicus, the Chaos-worshiping Interrogator in the aftermath of "Nubby's Girlfriend": To prevent her from escaping by charming any random mook during the trip back to Professor Oak, Doc works with the transit ship's medical crew to install a shunt in her spinal cord, completely paralyzing her from the nose down and leaving her only able to communicate by blinking in Morse code. After spending days like this in the company of Nubby, she is eventually shipped off to the Ordo Mallus to be interrogated. Unfortunately, she gets better.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a8a4b41e	type	Not So Stoic
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_a8a4b41e	comment	Not So Stoic: The two Iron Warriors (going by their silver-and-gold paint scheme) in the climax of Good Soldiers, Bad Educators audibly groan and visibly get annoyed when their Heretek charge gets excited over the MacGuffin. Iron Warriors are 10,000 year-old siege engineers who won't bat an eye over the worst battlefield conditions and used to brutal, grinding sieges, but a nerd who won't shut up about a magic box is too much to deal with.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_aa8d0ef0	type	Spell My Name with a "The"
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_aa8d0ef0	comment	Spell My Name with a "The": It's always The Rupert, not just "Rupert".
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ab21dce	type	TheCloudcuckoolanderWasRight
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ab21dce	comment	The Cloud Cuckoo Lander Was Right: In "What's In The Box", Twitch is convinced that the titular box is full of Orks and the non-PC Guard Regiment are all Orks in disguise. He is right on both counts. In "Tyranid Delivery Experts" Twitch becomes convinced the Tyranid zoanthrope has allied with the daemons and will unleash a horde of daemonthropes on the Guardsmen. Turns out the zoanthrope is a daemonhost, and it does spend most of its time trying to unleash an endless horde of "Daemonids" on the Occurrence Border.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ac2094ca	type	Red Shirt
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ac2094ca	comment	Red Shirt: The guardsmen are typically grouped with several less combat-focused teammates. Most of them don't survive.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ace24b2c	type	Halfway Plot Switch
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ace24b2c	comment	Halfway Plot Switch: The very premise of the series is a meta example - After several punishing Only War campaigns with a Killer Game Master, the surviving members of the players' regiment are suddenly hired by the Inquisition, and the players themselves are handed copies of Dark Heresy. Nubby's Girlfriend starts as a largely-espionage job that involves breaking up an entrenched genestealer cult before the authorities are forced to enact purges, until the party's current interrogator turns out to be a Chaos cultist trying to use the purges to trigger a daemonic ritual. 'Good Soldiers, Bad Educators' spends its first two-thirds following the misadventures of the Party while they try to whip a bunch of hopeless Inquisition trainees into shape, while the final third switches tone abruptly when a Necron voidship suddenly crash-lands and threatens to summon an army to the lightly-defended planet, followed by the Iron Warriors warband who had shot it down in the first place.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ad1db87c	type	Oh, Crap!
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ad1db87c	comment	Oh, Crap!: At the end of Tyranid Delivery Experts, the team finally delivers their deadly cargo to its destination. They are then promptly arrested by the Inquisition as renegades.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ad9559e6	type	Arc Villain
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ad9559e6	comment	Arc Villain: The female interrogator in "Nubby's Girlfriend".
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_aed65980	type	All for Nothing
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_aed65980	comment	All for Nothing: Everything the Guardsmen do during "Inquisitorial Penal Legion" is left pointless when Nubby, misunderstanding orders, pockets the one item that they were supposed to leave.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_afc52a86	type	Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_afc52a86	comment	Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot: Discount Spaceship saw the Guardsmen trapped between a demonically-possessed Knarloc and the servitor-Titan-Cogtain. After leaving the two to duke it out, Nubby joked they could combine into a "daemoni-servi-knarlo-titan". Not long after the Guardsmen end up fighting exactly that. The Occurrence Border has competing infections of squigs and kroots which eventually interbreed into what the crew calls sqroots and kruigs.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b06bbf4b	type	Be Careful What You Wish For
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b06bbf4b	comment	Be Careful What You Wish For: Frequently. Arguably the result of Sarge's promotion - sure, their superiors are no longer insane and can't just boss them around, but they have much worse assignments now since they've "proven" themselves by having one of their own become a trainee Inquisitor.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b1346878	type	Fate Worse than Death
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b1346878	comment	Fate Worse than Death: The fate of the Rogue Trader's ship in "The Greater Good". On Doc's suggestion the Guardsmen sabotage the warp engine and Gellar field generators such that the ship becomes trapped in the Warp with no shielding; this causes the ship's inhabitants to be devoured/damned by daemons.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b1dde8fd	type	Loophole Abuse
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b1dde8fd	comment	Loophole Abuse: After the fiasco at the research facility in "The [REDACTED] Conspiracy", the Deathwatch Apothecary decides that arresting the Guardsmen is no longer his squad's responsibility. According to him, their orders were to assist the Inquisitor in his investigation, not to do it for him. Now that he's dead, they are under no obligation to do anything but report back to their Watch Station for reassignment and let the Inquisition handle it. This obvious attempt to blow it all off as not his problem and have his superiors deal with it causes the Guardsmen to feel a deep sense of camaraderie between him and themselves.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b26cc887	type	Just Between You and Me
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b26cc887	comment	Just Between You and Me: Bane Johns, tied to a table as a death ray slowly tracks towards him, attempts to learn Gol'fingy's plan using this trope. Of course given Gol'fingy is an Ork, his only plan at the moment consists of cutting a noisy human in half with a death laser.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b427f328	type	Hand Puppet
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b427f328	comment	Hand Puppet: How do you explain Imperial-Tau political intrigue to a crew of idiot Guardsmen? With sock puppets! This gets repeated when the squad doesn't understand the complex and varied philosophies of the Inquisition, to the Guardsmen's annoyance.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b4d6aa7d	type	Dungeon Bypass
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b4d6aa7d	comment	Dungeon Bypass: Twice during Heretic Purging. When faced with the prospect of fighting their way through an underground complex full of Slaaneshi cultists with nothing but pistols and knives, the Guardsmen decide to leave and call in an orbital strike on the bunker instead. Earlier, when the team enters a Tzeentchian temple they find a Chaos shrine that lashes out at them with Combat Tentacles when they try to hose it with prometheum. Rather than try and fight their way through the tentacles, they stick explosives to the wall from outside (with a very long stick) and blow it to smithereens.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b4fa26d3	type	Only a Lighter
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b4fa26d3	comment	Only a Lighter: Bane had his Inquisitorial rosette modified to contain a lighter.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b588a9b6	type	Too Dumb to Fool
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_b588a9b6	comment	Too Dumb to Fool: The party intentionally plays this part when negotiating with an Eldar Warlock by acting not only stupid, but completely insane. After a while they wear him down into skipping the manipulative doublespeak and Exact Words tricks so that he'll just talk to them in plain Gothic. It also makes him underestimate them so much that his inevitable attempt to betray them (twice) is half-assed by Eldar standards.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_bafbff8f	type	Tom the Dark Lord
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_bafbff8f	comment	Tom the Dark Lord: The daemon the party repeatedly encounters on the Occurrence Border is apparently named Frank.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_bc07ffe3	type	Spies Are Lecherous
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_bc07ffe3	comment	Spies Are Lecherous: Bane Johns, Interplanetary Man of Mystery, is able to charm any woman he meets, from the female assassin squads on Oak's ship to his enemy's right-hand woman Ivana. It's another aspect of his nascent psyker power, which breaks down his target's mind until they are obsessed with him.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_bce16d24	type	Why Don't You Just Shoot Him?
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_bce16d24	comment	In general, this is the Squad's default solution to any problem. Their M.O. can be summed up as "Apply las fire and explosives to any problem until it stops being a problem."
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_be991863	type	The Neidermeyer
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_be991863	comment	The Neidermeyer: Interrogator, later Inquisitor, Sciscitat is a self-aggrandizing hardass who believes himself to be the smartest man in whatever galaxy he's in at the time. He despises the Guardsmen for being dumb Guardsmen and they hate him right back. He and his sycophants go out of their way to make the Guardsmen miserable and Sciscitat is gleeful when he betrays the Guardsmen. Even Oak finds the man to be unbearable in spite of this skill as an investigator, and he's mainly training the guy to not be such a jackass.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c2cedc1c	type	Big "NO!"
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c2cedc1c	comment	Big "NO!": Played for laughs when Bane learns the Guardsmen killed the Bitch and, in the middle of yelling "NO", pauses to take a breath.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c2d978fe	type	Car Fu
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c2d978fe	comment	Car Fu: Not even a Tau battlesuit can withstand a van full of Guardsmen ramming into it and pouring their entire arsenal into it at point-blank range.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c368c3ea	type	Spoonerism
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c368c3ea	comment	Bane Johns, the suave, hard-partying and improbably-lucky superspy, is a Spoonerism for James Bond. He's even strapped into a laser death trap by an Ork named Gol'fingy, and the dialogue from that scene is used mostly verbatim. Or more likely a reference to Archer with his flippant nonchalance.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c3bdfbb9	type	Let's You and Him Fight
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c3bdfbb9	comment	Let's You and Him Fight: During "The Xenotech Heresy" Sarge flies the Necron ship into the middle of the Necron and Heretek fleets and telling them the winner could have it. The two fleets end up fighting for so long that the Imperium is able to warp in reinforcements.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c4842ab1	type	Appropriated Appellation
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c4842ab1	comment	Appropriated Appellation: "Rupert" is British military slang for a dangerously incompetent upper-class officer. The Rupert wholeheartedly adopts this term once he learns about it and insists everyone in the unit call him as such. This takes all the fun out of it for the Guardsmen, but they still call him that, even after they warm up to him.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c5b47b36	type	Offscreen Moment of Awesome
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c5b47b36	comment	Offscreen Moment of Awesome: Most of "Interlude: Escape" is told through a series of announcements by the ship transporting the imprisoned Guardsmen. Reading between the lines, the team played a key role in repelling a daemonic incursion and used the good will from the ship's crew to build up the uniforms and equipment to stage an escape attempt.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c75df49a	type	Shout-Out
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c75df49a	comment	Shout-Out: Two characters are shout-outs to the Discworld: Nubby, the Guardsman who doesn't quite look human (to the point of having official paperwork to "prove" he's human) and steals everything not nailed down, is a blatant Expy of Nobby Nobbs. Aimy, whose full name and nobility are borrowed from another Discworld character. The warp-tainted, ramshackle free trader, the Occurrence Border, is one to Event Horizon. In fact, given that the film is all but stated to be a distant prequel to 40k, it may very well be the Event Horizon. The way the Interrogator's adepts die in "Nubby's Girlfriend" is a shoutout to Mission: Impossible. Bane Johns, the suave, hard-partying and improbably-lucky superspy, is a Spoonerism for James Bond. He's even strapped into a laser death trap by an Ork named Gol'fingy, and the dialogue from that scene is used mostly verbatim. Or more likely a reference to Archer with his flippant nonchalance. From the same episode as Bane Johns, we're given a stealth Firefly shout out from Sarge, who sprang Tink from confinement by "explaining the chain of command." The fact Sarge is covered in blood and holding a chain seems to imply he did so in Jayne's preferred manner. Heavy and his heavy stubber are basically Team Fortress 2's Heavy Weapons Guy. Tyranid Acquisition Experts has the Guardsmen team up with a squad of Space Marines to capture a Zoanthrope (a psychic Tyranid). It's Starship Troopers all over again... Twitch's insane accusation that the Emperor's Scythes are all Orks in disguise references the premise of another /tg/ classic, Deffwotch. The narrator references Red vs. Blue at multiple points, and Shoggy uses images from the show on some of the posts. The "Stealth" Mission includes an ex-Arbite traffic cop on a hive world with an extreme adherence to "the law". If his relentless pursuit of the party and later promotion to a "judge" didn't make it clear, Shoggy included a Judge Dredd reference pic with the related posts.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c9e16d77	type	Veteran Instructor
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_c9e16d77	comment	Veteran Instructor: The Guardsmen become this in Good Soldiers, Bad Educators, where they have to turn a bunch of randoms (and a squad of PDF) into Inquisitorial adepts. Things only work out after they all go Drill Sergeant Nasty (led by Sarge) on the recruits.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ca895242	type	Officer and a Gentleman
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ca895242	comment	Heretic Purging sees the Gaurdsmen, alongside The Rupert, sent to one of these to cleanse the planet of several Chaos cults. The fact that Deathworlders make for excellent Guard recruits is the only reason the Inquisition doesn't just Exterminatus the planet outright.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_caf89e54	type	Taking You with Me
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_caf89e54	comment	Taking You with Me: Crisp kills a Chaos Marine by having Twitch strap all his remaining explosives to his back and detonating them once he's too close for the marine to get away in time. Cutter is killed when a dying Heretek activates several explosive charges within his body which engulf him in flames.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ccf46587	type	Redshirt Army
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ccf46587	comment	Red Shirt Army: The Generis 99th suffered horrific attrition, with the first session ending with only a single survivor who was then killed for desertion. All of their sacrifices were made to buy time for better equipped, less expendable units to actually turn the tide of battle.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_cdd676a3	type	Hyper-Competent Sidekick
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_cdd676a3	comment	Hypercompetent Sidekick: The Guardsmen end up being this, due to usually being the only sane men, relatively speaking, to their Interrogators. Alfred, the Rupert's batman. The Guardsmen instantly bond with him over this. The Diplomacy Adept has this going for him as does an old female Adept they had for a previous mission. The former takes out a traitor that no one but him noticed and the latter could hide enough sidearms on her person for the entire team and she led a cleansing operation of the remaining members of a Nurgle cult.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ceb854cb	type	The Door Slams You
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ceb854cb	comment	The Door Slams You: Two in rapid succession during Nubby's Girlfriend. A pair of arbites blow a heavy door off its hinges and directly onto a stunned Sarge. They then proceed to address the rest of the team while standing directly on that door. Later, when Sarge gets the door off his back and raises it into position, a pair of bolter rounds slam into it, pitching him head-first into the wall and knocking him unconscious. Sarge does it to a couple security guards during The Stealth Mission when Sciscitat forbids them from killing them outright. First he hammers the door out of its frame and into a guard, then he picks up the door and hurls it at another guard.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_cf168867	type	The Corruption
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_cf168867	comment	The Corruption: The weapons produced by "the Box" slowly mutate their wielders into Orks. This is because it's a heretek manufactorum that uses servitorized Orks as assembly line workers, and an Ork Weirdboy as its AI. Fortunately, once the Box is destroyed, everyone goes back to normal.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_d13eb235	type	Occidental Otaku
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_d13eb235	comment	Occidental Otaku: Weebu, the representative to the modern Japan-themed neutral Tau/human colonies, displays all the characteristics of this: dresses in traditional Tau clothing, constantly praises their culture, etc.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_d2ddb362	type	ReasonYouSuckSpeech
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_d2ddb362	comment	"Reason You Suck" Speech: The squad gets a lot of these, though never from Oak himself. Aside from a few of their Interrogator and Inquisitor bosses, the team has also endured dressing down from ship captains, an Eldar Warlock, and the the ghost of a scout marine in the haunted poker room.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_d3ee665	type	Have You Tried Rebooting?
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_d3ee665	comment	Have You Tried Rebooting?: A techpriest suggests the Guards try this with Sciscitat's unhinged techpriest. Using their laspistols. Turning him on again might be difficult, but it's worth a try...
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_d45c0b86	type	Refuge in Audacity
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_d45c0b86	comment	Refuge in Audacity: During "Dude, Where's My Psyker?" the Guardsmen, an assassin, and some unstable psykers need to infiltrate the governor's palace when his forces are on alert to the Inquisition's presence. The party proceeds to enter "disguised" as a group of Guardsmen, an assassin, and some unstable psykers sent as reinforcements to defend against the Inquisition. While escaping the scene of a recent massacre which police are swarming to, Sarge just has his men walk back in full view with their full weapons loadout. No sane cop is going to question armed Guardsmen on leave, especially when there's somewhere more important to be.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_d66cd0e6	type	Training from Hell
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_d66cd0e6	comment	Training from Hell: The party's backstory, played through in a marathon session as a series of bloody Only War campaigns before they switched to Dark Heresy. Also applies to what they eventually put their Inquisitorial trainees through. The Guardsmen's Grav-chute training consists of getting a quick how-to from the scout marine teaching them and being pushed down an elevator shaft. According to the Scout, this is how he was trained himself.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_d8d6c4c	type	EternalRecurrance
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_d8d6c4c	comment	Eternal Recurrance: Inquisitor Quercus has been fighting the successors of the Cognitae for 300 years led by a daemon that has been trying to reestablish the school for that entire time and has been possessing Allies, minions, bystanders, and creatures that are mixed up with or even tangentially related to Oak and his various teams. The party has defeated what is implied to be this creature no less than 5 times in the course of a few years.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_da1211b4	type	Security Cling
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_da1211b4	comment	Security Cling: Aimy (part terrified of her team leader and part really happy to see the other Guardsmen) jumps into Sarge's arms when they meet again, and it takes some work to get her disentangled.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_db9940c4	type	Famed In-Story
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_db9940c4	comment	Famed In-Story: After the events of Greater Good the guardsmen become known as heroes among both the Tau and human populace of the sector. Although for them it is also the case of Your Approval Fills Me with Shame. They even become the stars of a Tau anime series called "The Super Deserter Gue'vesa Action Heroes", much to Sarge's disgust.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_dd45df38	type	Unfortunate Names
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_dd45df38	comment	Unfortunate Names: "The 'Stealth' Mission" takes place on a planet called "Joseph Haarlock Sucks at Cards". Apparently the name originates from a card game involving a previous planetary ruler; it's a bit of a sore point for the planet's residents.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_dd4d4d19	type	Taught by Television
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_dd4d4d19	comment	Taught by Television: When a desperate Doc asks Tink for advice on how to treat a dying Astartes, Tink starts talking about how they need to retrieve his gene-seed to foster the next generation of Space Marines, which is mostly correct... but then he insists that they need to implant it into another human to make a new clone of the dying Astartes, which is entirely wrong. It turns out he learned that watching Tau cartoons.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_de02afbc	type	No MacGuffin, No Winner
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_de02afbc	comment	No MacGuffin, No Winner: Given that MacGuffins tend to be heretical and dangerous, the Guardsmen prefer blowing them up when possible. In their mind it not only denies their enemy a win, it also means there's one less thing trying to corrupt and/or kill honest Guardsmen.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_de9047ac	type	Gambit Pileup
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_de9047ac	comment	Gambit Pileup: One of the reasons so many people died in the back story of the "The Interplanetary Man of Mystery" is because there are a half dozen factions running around trying to kill each other or obstructing each other's work.
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_de9047ac	featureApplicability	1.0
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_deb7c4d1	type	Super-Power Meltdown
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_deb7c4d1	comment	Super-Power Meltdown: Bane Johns suffers one as a result of the squad's relentless attack, forcing him to use more and more of his psychic energy to fend them off before he finally loses control.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_df80e640	type	Not Proven
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_df80e640	comment	Not Proven: The party is cleared of criminal incompetence in allowing their two Astartes handlers to be crushed by a Tyranid flyer and bisected by a Hive Tyrant, respectively by a Ordo Xenos tribunal. Two-thirds of it, anyway.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e062bcc4	type	Sink or Swim Mentor
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e062bcc4	comment	The Guardsmen's Grav-chute training consists of getting a quick how-to from the scout marine teaching them and being pushed down an elevator shaft. According to the Scout, this is how he was trained himself.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e1fa8421	type	Dead Person Conversation
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e1fa8421	comment	Dead Person Conversation: Lots of them when the Occurrence Border's questionable Gellar Field network starts to fail, including with the deceased Crisp, Heavy, Cutter and the Scout Marine. Even when the Gellar Fields are working properly this is a normal event onboard the ship, and it's regarded as a mostly harmless anomaly by the ship's standards and something to watch on boring guard details.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e3d2f2	type	The Fool
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e3d2f2	comment	The Fool: Bane Johns, the squad's fifth Interrogator: despite what seems like a surfeit of confidence and a lack of strategic planning or common sense, every event in his mission seems to go his way without fail. Turns out he's a psyker with previously undiscovered Reality Warper tendencies who can casually arrange probability to go in his favor - by siphoning away the luck of his teammates or anyone nearby, leading to their (probably) swift death while leaving Bane unharmed. It's also deconstructed, since a lifetime of everything effortlessly going his own way has turned Johns into a psychopathic hedonist with no conscience.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e42c07e6	type	Holy Hand Grenade
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e42c07e6	comment	Holy Hand Grenade: Faced with a Chaos shield which won't yield to gunfire or explosives, the Guardsmen decide to use faith - a combination of barrels of promethium, wheelbarrows of assorted holy relics (volunteered by pilgrims who found "we're going to use it to blow up some heretics" a very good reason to part with them), and every explosive they could find blessed by every priest they could find. Not coincidentally, the post's image is the Trope Namer.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e529d5c3	type	Torches and Pitchforks
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e529d5c3	comment	Torches and Pitchforks: The first chapter has the Party's "Nerd" charges accidentally rile up a shipload of pilgrims by trying to apprehend a heretic by chasing one into them. The mob promptly tears the heretic to shreds and tries to do the same to the Nerds to be safe. Later, the Guardsmen recruit a mob of their own to help them fight heretics, something the zealots do all too eagerly.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e5507f60	type	Truce Zone
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e5507f60	comment	Truce Zone: It turns out one of these actually manages to exist between the Imperium and the Tau. This hazy region of space contains such heresies as humans and aliens living together peacefully, religious freedom, and better-functioning government. On the other hand, the Guardsmen also notice a lack of certain freedoms they would have on Imperial worlds, such as walking around with their armaments on display, security checkpoints which don't allow for armaments, and vehicles which are all fitted with monitoring equipment and speed-o-meter triggered autobrakes. After their rude awakening, Sarge has Tink and Nubby figure out ways around such nuisances.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e5fd8bc2	type	Hate Sink
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e5fd8bc2	comment	Hate Sink: Sciscitat and his retinue. The majority of the "The Stealth Mission" consists of them doing literally everything they can to make the squad miserable or get them killed, simply because they can.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e5ffeb19	type	Phlebotinum-Induced Stupidity
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e5ffeb19	comment	Phlebotinum-Induced Stupidity: During The "Stealth" Mission, the Guardsmen learn that a Chaos artifact held by a high-level crimelord, who would normally try and keep it a secret, is the prize of a high-stakes poker game. Their associated interrogators leap at the opportunity to participate until the lead inquisitor (up in orbit) bawls them out for their stupidity. Why the plot suddenly became the setup to a Bond film is not a property of the artifact itself, but rather Bane Johns, the Interplanetary Man of Mystery. Bane Johns's psyker power causes women to become obsessed with him and behave like lovestruck idiots.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e624f0e8	type	Suspiciously Specific Denial
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e624f0e8	comment	Suspiciously Specific Denial: The team buys a truck loaded with barrels which the owner, completely unprompted, assures them contain no Orks. The team, especially Twitch, finds this very concerning.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e784bb8c	type	Accidental Truth
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e784bb8c	comment	Accidental Truth: During The Xenotech Heresy Sarge claims that there is an entire heretek fleet chasing the archaeotech in order to keep the techpriests in line. Just after he finally admits he's lying, a heretek fleet drops out of the Warp.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e96e7845	type	Ramp Jump
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e96e7845	comment	Ramp Jump: During "The 'Stealth' Mission" the Guardsmen jump their vehicle across a gap in a Hive bridge. The moment is made decidedly less awesome by the fact they're driving a shitty van which barely makes the distance.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e9d21924	type	Comically Inept Healing
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e9d21924	comment	Comically Inept Healing: Due to the abnormal anatomy and physiology of Space Marines and the side-effects of Tyranid biovenom, Doc and Tink's attempts to administer first aid to Sergeant Gravis quickly devolves into this. Doc pulls himself together and actually gives Gravis (or at least his upper half) treatment, but Tink keeps insisting they follow the advice of his heretical Tau cartoons (produced by xenos scum that don't know anything about the subject).
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e9e35e8f	type	Exact Words
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_e9e35e8f	comment	Exact Words: Mention is made of how entire armies can be mustered and deployed to worlds only to be forgotten by the Administratum long enough for them to literally build a new life, start families, and die. The Guardsmen imagine that when new orders finally do arrive, their relatives probably dig up the bodies to present them for muster. When the Judge Dredd-expy Governor Marshall protests using an Arbite ship's brig to transport, to quote Sciscitat, "Unimportant prisoners", Sciscitat flippantly suggests just shoving the Guardsmen in a laundry room instead. Much to the befuddlement of the ship's crew, the Governor Marshall does just that and has them placed into the ship's laundry room.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_eaf5a1ac	type	Groin Attack
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_eaf5a1ac	comment	Groin Attack: Nubby's preferred method of melee combat. Especially effective after he's given augmetic legs. Cutter does this too, though not always successfully as his targets sometimes have augmetics of their own. Aimy grabs, squeezes and twists a half-Ogryn's goods until he falls down on top of her.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ed68bcc9	type	Dwindling Party
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ed68bcc9	comment	The party's backstory, played through in a marathon session as a series of bloody Only War campaigns before they switched to Dark Heresy. Also applies to what they eventually put their Inquisitorial trainees through.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_eff83d77	type	Mundane Utility
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_eff83d77	comment	Mundane Utility: The Occurrence Border at some point acquired an ancient statue of an insectoid god that drives anyone who looks at it insane. The crew used its various arms to prop up some energy conduits, and throw a tarp over it if they're doing maintenance.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f06b07ff	type	Locked Out of the Loop
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f06b07ff	comment	Locked Out of the Loop: Happens to the Guardsmen for most of "The Stealth Mission", courtesy of Sciscitat deeming them too stupid to trust with details of the mission. It isn't until the ceasefire with the other Inquisitorial team they mistakenly engaged that they finally learn what's going on... and Sciscitat's "don't tell the idiot Guardsmen anything" policy starts to actively backfire on him, a fact that he refuses to acknowledge or apologize for.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f06b07ff	featureConfidence	1.0
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f178203a	type	Inspector Javert
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f178203a	comment	Inspector Javert: The ex-Arbite traffic cop will issue a ticket for every infraction committed by his target and allows nobody to interfere in his duty. Even the antagonist's goons know better than to interfere with him.
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f178203a	featureApplicability	1.0
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f178203a	featureConfidence	1.0
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f237981e	type	The Alleged Car
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f237981e	comment	The Alleged Car: The second-hand Warp-ship known as the Occurrence Border which has been called a "glorified Space Hulk". The first thing that the team notices about it is that the entire bow and half of the ship's total length is missing and crudely welded over, and it only gets worse from there. It does make it perfect as an Inquisition base though, since everyone assumes nobody of any importance would be caught dead in the thing. The party also obtains and drives self-described "shitty vans" on three separate occasions. Enforced during "The 'Stealth' Mission" when the party is given the shitty van to end all shitty vans. Every request to modify it, such as adding working air conditioning or actual seats, is vetoed by a tech priest on the grounds of it being "heretical". In reality, the tech priest just really hates the Guardsmen, and this is just one of many ways he tries to fuck them over over the course of the mission.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f3594e1	type	The All-Concealing "I"
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f3594e1	comment	The All-Concealing "I": Shoggy narrates the stories as though he were a member of the Guardsmen. However he never reveals which character he is in-game, referring to each member of the team in third person. That said, when the guards split into multiple groups, he tends to refer to groups containing Nubby as "we" more often than groups without him.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f7d4f121	type	Mushroom Samba
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f7d4f121	comment	Mushroom Samba: One of the Occurrence Border's docking bays is covered in caustic, psychically-active warp fungus. Hallucinations ensue when a shuttle of Space Marines accidentally docks in it.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f7d66b6f	type	No-Gear Level
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f7d66b6f	comment	No-Gear Level: Downplayed in "The 'Stealth' Mission", as the team is forced to leave behind all of their custom weapons, munitions, and Spot. They're reduced to a standard Guardsman's kit and have to scrounge up non-standard supplementary weapons to survive. Played straight with the "Interlude: Escape" and "Inquisitorial Penal Legion" as the team is stripped of all equipment at the start of each mission.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f863e840	type	Dying Smirk
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_f863e840	comment	Dying Smirk: Crisp laughs as his flamer tank is detonated, killing him and his squad's current nemesis. Cutter revels in the joy of battle and good combat-drugs as his enemy self-destructs.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_faf5732b	type	I Call It "Vera"
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_faf5732b	comment	I Call It "Vera": Tink first names his Tau stealth drone as "Hannah 2.0." Sarge makes him change the name to Spot.
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All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ff070bbd	type	Attack! Attack! Attack!
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic) / int_ff070bbd	comment	Attack! Attack! Attack!: One of the side-effects of the weapons from What's In The Box?, due to their wielders being infected with Orkoid mindsets. In the same episode, Cutter and the Rupert decide that the best way to engage a distracted Ork firing line from behind is to charge in screaming with sword upraised. Alfred and the rest of the Squad manage to keep them from getting killed, but it was a close thing.
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The following is a list of statements referring to the current page from other pages.

AllGuardsmenParty	sameAs	All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)
Tabletop Games / Fan Fic	seeAlso	All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Appropriated Appellation / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Band of Brothers / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Beneath Notice / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Bilingual Bonus / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Can Only Move the Eyes / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Captured on Purpose / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Car Fu / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Comically Inept Healing / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Cool Old Guy / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Dead Person Conversation / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Declining Promotion / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Doom It Yourself / int_872588ce
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Drill Sergeant Nasty / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Dwindling Party / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Dying Smirk / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Famed In-Story / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Fanfics of 2014â€“2015 / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Femme Fatale / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	First-Episode Twist / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Generic Name / int_872588ce
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Give Chase with Angry Natives / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Going Native / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Half the Man He Used to Be / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Hand Puppet / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Hand Puppet Mockery / int_872588ce
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Have You Tried Rebooting? / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Hell Is War / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Holy Hand Grenade / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	I Call It "Vera" / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Implacable Man / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Killer Game Master / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Medium Awareness / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	More Dakka / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Mushroom Samba / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	No MacGuffin, No Winner / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	No Such Thing as Alien Pop Culture / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Not Proven / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Oddly Overtrained Security / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Once Done, Never Forgotten / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Only I Can Make It Go / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Only Sane Employee / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Paper-Thin Disguise / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Plasma Cannon / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Ramp Jump / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Reassigned to Antarctica / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Red Shirt / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Right Behind Me / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Security Cling / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Sergeant Rock / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Spies Are Lecherous / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Spy School / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Spy Ship / int_872588ce
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Sticky Fingers / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Summon Bigger Fish / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Supernatural Phone / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Taught by Television / int_872588ce
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	The Alleged Car / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	The Corruption / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	The Cuckoolander Was Right / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	The Fool / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	The Scrounger / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Through the Eyes of Madness / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Too Awesome to Use / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Truce Zone / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Unholy Matrimony / int_1a4438ee
All Guardsmen Party (Fanfic)	hasFeature	Your Approval Fills Me with Shame / int_1a4438ee

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