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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate

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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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It's common, when people are having a long discussion stretching across a number of different topics, that something will come up that they disagree on. Most of the time, they'll discuss this for a little bit, then move on to talking about something else.
Not this time. No, this time the argument becomes truly heated. Voices are raised. Curses are spit out. Friends are insulted. Parents threaten to disown children. Furniture is thrown across the room in fury. Fights break out. No one involved is willing to back down until they convince the others that they are right right RIGHT, DAMMIT!!
... all over something as mundane and inconsequential as whether or not peanut butter technically counts as a sauce.noteFor the record, it DOESN'T, and if you say otherwise, I'll KILL you. It's stupid, pointless, and really shouldn't be worth so much passion, but the characters just. Can't. Let it. Go.
Needless to say, Truth in Television—just see Broken Base for a number of media-centric examples (also see Unpleasable Fanbase and Base-Breaking Character, though we don't keep examples for those anymore). Frequently overlaps with Hypothetical Fight Debate, Fandom Rivalry (including the all-famous Console and Computer Wars), and Ship-to-Ship Combat.
This is when a Seinfeldian Conversation becomes Serious Business. When it happens in Real Life — YouTube comments in particular are full of these — some people theorize that it's because the combatants are people with an extremely fragile sense of self worth, and they view their opinion as a source of validation. In other words, they think that if they're wrong (or if someone else disagrees with them) about whether Spider-Man's costume is made of nylon or spandex, it lessens their inherent degree of value as a human being. Other people just enjoy having serious discussions about trivial subjects.
Not to be confused with the 1960s Astronauts in Caveman Days comedy It's About Time, or a Ginger or MaryAnn debate. Not related to Ancient Astronauts.
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A random monster then shows up and is asked about it. He picks astronauts because the question had already been answered in Planet of the Apes. Astronaut fought caveman and won.
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The Far Side had the following caption for a tentful of men drawing scimitars at each other:
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Henchmen #21 and #24 seem to have these debates a lot. Another episode showed them arguing over whether or not Smurfs lay eggs.
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Sluggy Freelance has Torg and Riff debating what's the axiom of flavor: Garlic Butter or Breaded & Deep Fat Fried. Zoe acts as referee, and the debate reaches the point of physical violence when the Minion Master throws in Salt as a contender.
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This trope is pretty much the whole reason DEATH BATTLE! exists. They use science to calculate who would win, with a hefty dose of how the characters in question normally fight. Wonder Woman hitting Rogue in the face is normal fighting style for her, while Spider-Man's spider-sense negates Batman's favored "sneak up on them" technique. There are still those who argue the results.
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A skit in Tales of Berseria features Rokurou and Eizen get in an argument on whether the beetle that has been de-therionized and is now in Laphicet's care is a stag beetle or rhinoceros beetle. They both give their justifications and are very passionate while doing so, much to everyone's discontent.
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In Avengers: Age of Ultron, once the plot's winding down, Steve and Tony argue with Thor as to whether Vision can lift Mjölnir because he's worthy or because he's a machine.
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The Angel episode "A Hole in the World" is the Trope Namer. Wesley walks in on Spike and Angel after they've spent 40 minutes shouting at each other about who would win in a fight between cavemen and astronauts. Pretty soon everyone in the show is getting in on the act; it's all built up to the episode's Wham Line: "Cavemen win, of course the cavemen win", one character's last words.
The Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode "Life Serial" has The Trio arguing passionately about James Bond movies. Warren favours Sean Connery and loathes Moonraker, Jonathan prefers Roger Moore, while Andrew likes Timothy Dalton.
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In the Cheers episode "The Triangle," the bar regulars (who frequently debate mundane topics) get into an intense discussion of Roadrunner-Coyote cartoons. The argument escalates from whether the coyote is obsessed or simply hungry, to whether his ability to survive falling off a cliff indicates he's the Antichrist.
The bar is also divided over The Munsters and The Addams Family, which they consider Serious Business.
In the pilot they had a debate over which Hollywood movie had the most sweat in it. Candidates included Body Heat, Aliens and Ben-Hur. ("The boys in the galley were sweating like pigs.") Diane's fiance suggested Cool Hand Luke.
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It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia frequently employs this trope.
The audience glimpses the tail end of one of these arguments in the Cold Open of "The Gang Gets Invincible": the matter of contention being whether a rat or a scorpion would win in a duel against one another.
The entire plot of "Reynolds v. Reynolds: the Cereal Defense." Frank crashes into Dennis's Land Rover while Dennis was eating a bowl of cereal, causing him to spill it on the dashboard. Dennis claims Frank is responsible for the spill; Frank insists that eating cereal in a car is inherently risky, so Dennis assumes responsibility for the effects of the spill. They then get sidetracked by Mac into yet another argument over whether or not natural selection and evolution are real.
"The Gang Solves the Bathroom Problem" finds the five main characters spending an afternoon arguing about who is allowed to use which restroom in the bar.
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The Simpsons:
In the episode "Homer at the Bat", Wade Boggs is knocked out cold by Barney after the two argue over who's the best British Prime Minister of all time.
Another episode has Ned Flanders say that his denomination of Christianity (The Northwest Branch of American Reform Presbylutheranism) split off from the Catholic Church several centuries ago over the right of worshipers to come to church with wet hair. He then sheepishly admits that his denomination has since abolished that right.
Similarly, the founders of Springfield and Shelbyville were originally one group which fragmented over whether or not people could marry their cousins.
In "Regarding Margie", Sideshow Mel and Captain MacAlistair are fighting over what the most delicious kind of cherry is, while balanced on Bumblebee Man and Duffman's shoulders.
In "C.E. D'oh", Lenny and Carl are fighting with carbon rods as they argue which of the first two Star Wars prequels are worse:
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In Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty, Rose reflects on her first meeting with Raiden in New York City. Rose was misdirecting some tourists to the Chrysler Building, thinking it was the centerpiece of King Kong. Raiden, a movie buff, overheard this and the pair got into a shouting match until the tourists fled.
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A running joke in Ricky Gervais' Extras. The main character and his best friend would ask each other questions like, "what would you rather be? A penguin, where you are a bird but you can't fly, or a flying fish where you can fly but you're still a fish." Once or twice an episode.
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MythBusters addresses these a lot, particularly trying to test the legitimacy of taking idioms literally note In a meta example, one such discussion ended up overwhelming the discussion page for the show on TV Tropes itself, complete with diagrams.
One myth came directly from a very heated argument going on at their own website; namely "Can a plane take off if it's on a conveyor belt running in the opposite direction?" They tested it, and concluded that yes, it can; forward motion is driven by the propeller, and how the wheels interact with the ground is irrelevant.
Another time, they tested what would happen if a truck was traveling at 60 miles per hour and a ball was ejected from the back of the truck at the same speed. It fell vertically from the point where it was fired. The forward motion of the truck and the aft motion of the ball-launcher cancelled each other out.
Yet another test involved the double-dipping claim from Seinfeld above; they ruled that double-dipping didn't add all that many mouth-germs to a dip since because it is lost in the bacterial noise in the food itself.
The Scope Snipe, particularly a famous one by Vietnam-era sniper Carlos Hathcock, was initially deemed busted due to the number of refractive lenses and narrowness of the scope itself preventing a clean bore. They recognized the problem with discrediting a myth that is popular among snipers, but acknowledged that their initial testing was done with modern scopes and not the shorter, wider scopes with fewer lenses from the correct era. It was confirmed on a revisit.
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In the Miraculous Ladybug fic akumas don't count, a class is split evenly on the topic of whether a kiss shared while brainwashed (a common occurrence in their city) "counts". The class president ruling on the subject only makes everyone angrier, fracturing the argument into several subtopics; what distance counts as a "kiss", whether a local celebrity is a slut, and whether kisses to cure someone's brainwashing or had during brainwashing (rather than because of it) count. Then the two people who started the argument start brawling.
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In an episode of G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero, the Dreadnoks can be seen in the background having come to blows over whether a certain product was a breath mint or a candy mint.
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In the Beavis and Butt-Head episode "Patsies," B&B are recruited to join a teacher's "Positive Acting Teens" and help a group of dorks clean up trash beside a highway. On the way there in the van, B&B make their "this sucks" faces while a couple of the dorks argue about which would be better—making Data human or curing Geordi of his blindness.
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Many a troper has probably been watching a classic movie with friends when an inane debate broke out. Ever witnessed a debate running the length of Back to the Future over whether the Flux-Capacitor capacitates flux or fluxes capacitance? The winners are the people who made the physics students who started the trouble watch The Core. As a similar example in literature, fans of Tolkien's Legendarium have engaged in more than one Flame War over whether Balrogs have wings, based on an ambiguous passage in The Lord of the Rings that could either indicate literal wings or Symbolic Wings.
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The Teen Titans Go! episode "Burger vs. Burrito" had Cyborg and Beast Boy getting into an escalating war over which of their favorite foods is superior, culminating in a fight between Cyborg's giant burger robot and Beast Boy's burrito kaiju. After their combatants have destroyed each other, the two friends make up and then look like they're about to have another debate over whether pie or ice cream is the better dessert, only for them to agree that those two foods are better eaten together.
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In Community Jeff and Britta spend an entire evening arguing with each other over which bar is better place for Troy to have his first drink when turns twenty-one, "The Red Door" or "L Street". Troy looks up to both Jeff and Britta as two different ways to be cool and mature, but becomes infuriated when they all learn that "The Red Door" and "L Street" are the same bar, meaning that their argument (And thus the entire competing lifestyles represented by Jeff and Britta) is meaningless since they are just slapping different terms onto the same things.
And again when it comes out that Jeff is the only member of the study group that dislikes the band Barenaked Ladies. Hilariously, they're having this argument at the exact same time they're arguing over something actually important, and treating it with more gravity.
Troy and Abed had an argument if having giant ears or a tail would be better, walking into the study room and asking the others, only then realising that a different group was using the study room. They then have the other group cast votes.
More examples can be thought of and it is implied that the group has meaningless arguments like this even off-screen:
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Hank and Davis of Corner Gas apparently have a long-standing debate over who is cooler—Darth Maul or Darth Vader. Davis supports the Vader side and staunchly believes that everyone just thinks Darth Maul is cool because he has a double lightsaber.
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According to The Devil's Dictionary, Australia's "industrial and commercial development has been unspeakably retarded by an unfortunate dispute among geographers as to whether it is a continent or island."
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Supernatural: Sam and Dean Winchester have their own version of this as shown in the episode "Death's Door" with Chuck Norris vs. Jet Li. They also argue over which movie snacks are the best and who was a better stooge, Curly vs. Shemp.
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Queen of Thieves: Nikolai and Vivienne have strong opposing opinions on whether white chocolate is "real" chocolate and will get into heated debates over it.
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There is an episode of Married... with Children in which a riot breaks out amongst the members of NOMAAM over the question of who starred in the first lite beer commercial.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_4617a9f2
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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In an interview with Jon Stewart, Bill Clinton discussed this essentially happening in politics. When you have two similar candidates (in this case Barack Obama and Hillary Rodham Clinton), the campaign becomes about stressing the minor differences between them. That can lead to them passionately stressing and arguing about a stance that the candidates don't actually find that important. Heck, any random, small, and otherwise irrelevant, difference in political, philosophical or religious views could turn into this.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_4d8e5ec
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 The Daily Show
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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The Big Bang Theory has a parody of this in which the guys debate who the bravest person in the Marvel Universe is. Candidates include Captain America's undocumented Mexican gardener, the doctor who gives Wolverine his prostate exam, and whoever uses the bathroom after the Thing.
Raj and Leonard once debated over whether or not mummies and zombies are the same thing. Leonard won the debate by calling in Insufferable Genius Sheldon, who quickly decimated Raj's argument.
In "The Bakersfield Expedition," Penny, Amy, and Bernadette decide to read a single comic book to try and understand why their boyfriends (and Raj) are so obsessed with them. They read an issue of Thor, and at first deride the comic as stupid and the boys' arguing over minor details as a complete waste of time. As an example, Penny sarcastically refers to Thor's hammer as "so heavy that no one else can lift it"... which leads the girls to start debating whether the hammer is heavy or magical. By the end of the episode, they're tearing through every Thor comic that Leonard and Sheldon own and fiercely arguing over minutiae in them.
To the girls, Sheldon mentions in passing a discussion he and the other guys had about whether werewolves can swim. The girls quickly become drawn into the debate.
An episode starts with Sheldon wanting to ask a question regarding Man-Bat and Batman, the guys quickly get into a complicated and tongue-twisting discussion regarding how a combination of the two characters via bite would be named. The scene ends before Sheldon even gets to ask the question.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_4e45b093
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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In Persona 5 Royal, the siblings Justine and Caroline argue about whether jellyfish are better than killer whales, which indicates their precociousness and respective personalities. Then they demand that the "inmate" they're escorting give his opinion. No option ends well.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_5921531c
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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Marvel Universe example from Comic Book A Plus X #6: Captain Marvel and Wolverine get into a literal Caveman vs. Astronaut debate during a poker game. Carol, who starts the argument, even mentions that she first heard it on Angel. Made especially relevant since Carol and Logan are, more or less, an astronaut and a caveman respectively.
A random monster then shows up and is asked about it. He picks astronauts because the question had already been answered in Planet of the Apes. Astronaut fought caveman and won.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_62570927
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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The Hardly Working skit "Mothra" had several of the CollegeHumor writers being threatened by a predatory Moth Menace and completely losing focus on the problem in favor of arguing about whether it's technically classifiable as a monster or just a really, really big moth.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_65951562
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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In Watch_Dogs 2, Marcus and Wrench get into a debate on who would win in a fight between Aliens and Predator. Then they bring Judge Dredd, Batman and even Archie into the discussion.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_662d5d1f
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_6edca17b
comment
In Crimson Tide, a fight ensues when one character says that the Kirby Silver Surfer was the only true Silver Surfer, and that the Moebius Silver Surfer was shit.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_6edca17b
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_6edca17b
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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In The Rundown, Beck gets into a debate over whether Mike Tyson could take Muhammad Ali if they were both in their prime. Beck claims Ali could take Tyson.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_72de92f6
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_72de92f6
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7884ec15
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Seinfeld:
Elaine and her boyfriend of the week get into a heated argument leading to their breakup about when it's appropriate to use exclamation points.
In another episode, George and another man try to park in the same Parallel Parking spot at the same time. George insists that the other guy needs to give up the spot because he was trying to pull in front first, and the only civilized way to parallel park is by backing up. The other guy disagrees, and they spend the rest of the night with both their cars halfway in the spot, halfway in the street, arguing over the validity of front-first parking. Everyone who passes by has a strongly held opinion on the issue, even the cops who show up to make them move their cars.
While attending the funeral of his current girlfriend's aunt in "The Implant," George ends up getting into an argument about double-dipping that quickly turns violent. It eventually gets so intense, his girlfriend angrily breaks up with him and throws him out of the house.
In one Seinfeldian Conversation opening segment, George asks Jerry who he'd eat first if he were stranded with only him and Kramer and is actually offended when Jerry says he'd start with Kramer.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7884ec15
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7884ec15
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_78db2b3b
comment
In Jonathan Swift's Gulliver's Travels, there is a war waging between people who break their hard-boiled egg at the fat end (the "big-endians"), and those who break it at the narrow end. (It's a deliberate analogy to Whigs vs Tories in British party politics of Swift's time.)
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_78db2b3b
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7a7a1a86
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In the pilot they had a debate over which Hollywood movie had the most sweat in it. Candidates included Body Heat, Aliens and Ben-Hur. ("The boys in the galley were sweating like pigs.") Diane's fiance suggested Cool Hand Luke.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7a7a1a86
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7a7a1a86
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7aaf9e41
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An episode starts with Sheldon wanting to ask a question regarding Man-Bat and Batman, the guys quickly get into a complicated and tongue-twisting discussion regarding how a combination of the two characters via bite would be named. The scene ends before Sheldon even gets to ask the question.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7aaf9e41
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 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7aaf9e41
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7aaf9e41
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7b121809
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Ghastly's Ghastly Comic; Nort tries to deflect attention from it being his turn to buy the next round of drinks by pretending he and Glemph were discussing whether Christopher Walken was creepier than John Malkovich, specifically in an "ass-rape" situation.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7b121809
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 Ghastly's Ghastly Comic (Webcomic)
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7b121809
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7dbde88b
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An episode of Drake & Josh had the brothers arguing over who'd win in a fight between Lindsay Lohan and Hilary Duff, which Helen resolves by agreeing that Lohan would win because Duff can't take a punch. They then argue who'd win in a fight between Clay Aiken and Frodo, but both agree on Frodo.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7dbde88b
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7df0e02c
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In Starman #13, one of the Mist's goons has a bizarre conversation with the captive Mikaal about who the best big screen Philip Marlowe was. He then admits that he once murdered a man for daring to claim it was George Montgomery.
Another issue had drugrunners tensely arguing over the best Sondheim musical.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7df0e02c
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7df0e02c
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7e850e47
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In Bravely Default Agnes and Edea start going at it in an epic argument about which dessert is the best. Tiz and Ringabel are naturally exasperated at this.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7e850e47
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_7e850e47
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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Many, many arguments in Knights of the Dinner Table. Whether dwarven women have beards is one that occurs multiple times, with various characters citing evidence from their favorite fantasy novels, games, etc. Sara has grabbed male characters' shirts and threatened physical violence over the issue.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_86772227
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 Knights of the Dinner Table (Comic Strip)
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_86772227
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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Kim Possible: In the episode where we learn why Dr. Drakken became a mad scientist, he is shocked to find out that Kim is the daughter of Dr. Possible, who he knew in college, and who he is currently attempting to take revenge upon. When Ron (who is currently Drakken's prisoner) makes fun of him for not making the connection, Drakken defends himself on the basis that "Possible is a very common last name." Drakken ends up leaving the room in order to get a phone book just to back up his argument, causing him to miss the fact that rescuers are breaking into the building.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_90a3a7f4
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 Kim Possible
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_90a3a7f4
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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Animorphs:
One book informs us that, when they were younger, Jake and Marco would spend entire afternoons arguing about whether or not cheese tastes yellow (Marco thought it tasted sorta green). Now that they're older, they have more serious, adult debates, like Who Would Win: Spider-Man or Batman?
Cassie and Marco got into a debate about which term for vomiting was the best after Marco pointed out that the action has a lot of Unusual Euphemisms... while carrying a very sick Jake back home after he had aborted the mission to throw up. Terms range from the expected (Ralph, Hurl, Puke, Spew) to more creative (Blowing Chunks, Upchuck, Losing your Lunch, Tango with the Toilet). Marco is declared the winner with "A Yawn in Technicolor" which causes even Jake to laugh and then immediately barf again. It should be pointed out that this is not something Cassie is known for doing, but she knew Jake was upset for botching the mission and that he would have had this conversation with Marco if he wasn't as sick as he was.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_90c73dda
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 Animorphs
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_90c73dda
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_9787cced
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Powers of Invisibility mentions an hour-long argument about the cuteness of bunnies vs puppies between Rose and Alix. Rose somehow got Alix to admit that bunnies were "awesome" and considers it a victory.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_9787cced
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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Have I Got News for You: Quite often Paul Merton would indulge in this; once having a (seemingly) aggressive shouting match with Arthur Smith over whether or not you should put tomato sauce on baked beans.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_99f8c7fb
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 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_99f8c7fb
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 Have I Got News for You
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_99f8c7fb
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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The Regular Show episode "Replaced" states Mordecai and Rigby as once having a 3-day long argument about the outcome of a fight between a "two-headed dinosaur and a robotic Bigfoot". When they attempt to have their potential replacements discuss the same argument to get them to stop working, they both agree the "robotic Bigfoot" is the obvious choice.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_9e2dbb4d
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 Regular Show
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_9e2dbb4d
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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In One Piece when Buggy reveals that he knows Shanks we get a flashback to his days on Gold Roger's ship alongside Shanks. The very first scene we see is Shanks and Buggy literally at each other's necks arguing over whether the North Pole or South Pole is colder all the while the other crew members cheerfully egg them on. The argument is broken up when Rayleigh cuffs both of them and exasperatedly states that nobody cares which pole is colder. It's implied that Shanks and Buggy get up to this sort of thing a lot.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_9e2f90f4
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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In video-game fandom circles, the debate of "if one billion lions were to face off against one of each Pokémon, which side would win" has sparked numerous heated arguments. Some argue that the Pokémon would win due to the existence of several godlike Pokémon with incredibly powerful abilities and the fact that Pokémon can control things like electricity and fire while lions cannot. Others argue that the lions would win due to the fact that, since there were only 896 Pokémon at the time this argument was most prominent, the lions would have them beat by sheer force of numbers, and considering both this and the fact that lions hunt in groups, the lions would be able to Zerg Rush their Pokémon foes. This debate has even become sort of an inside joke in the Pokémon fandom, and the source of many memes.
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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In Rugrats, at a costume party, Stu and Drew vehemently disagree on whether Tarzan or King Kong (their respective costumes) is king of the jungle. Stu suggests that they take it outside; Drew appears to agree but then locks Stu out of the house. Not that these brothers need much of a reason to get nasty with each other.
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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Moral Orel had the Puppingtons and Postabules become Feuding Families because the former say "trespasses/trespassers" and the latter "debtors/debts" for the Lord's Prayer. And yes, this is Truth in Television.
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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Futurama:
In "Why Must I Be A Crustacean In Love?", Zoidberg discusses "the ceremony of Claw-Plach, where my species fight to the death over matters of honor." Also whether abbreviations count in Scrabble. "They don't!"
In "I Dated a Robot", the gang is walking through cyberspace and pass a Star Trek forum, where two nerds are in the midst of a heated "Kirk vs. Picard" debate.
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_a183d57f
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_a1b53bd6
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Beyond the Borders has a debate that is literally about cavemen versus astronauts, who are apparently fighting simply because the moon is haunted.
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_a1b53bd6
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1.0
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_a1b53bd6
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_a1b53bd6
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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In BuzzFeed Unsolved, Bears v Sharks, in "The Odd Death of Michelle Von Emster" and "The Strange Drowning of Natalie Wood".
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_a24c1846
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 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_a24c1846
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 BuzzFeed Unsolved (Web Video)
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_a24c1846
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
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The Jonathan Creek episode "The Three Gamblers", which has a Hollywood Voodoo theme, has one scene open with Jonathan and Maddie barely speaking after a furious row. It turns out they disagree about the exact meaningless words in the chorus of the novelty song "The Witch Doctor".
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 Jonathan Creek
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_a309575c
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"Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate
 "Cavemen vs. Astronauts" Debate / int_a4420d22
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The Venture Bros.: Who would win in a fight, Lizzie Borden or Anne Frank?
Henchmen #21 and #24 seem to have these debates a lot. Another episode showed them arguing over whether or not Smurfs lay eggs.
One argument between two of the Monarch's henchman was a debate to determine the better lake monster: "Champ" or the Loch Ness Monster. Then a recently badassified 21 enters the debate. Turns out Ogopogo wins.
Not only 21 and 24, but the creative minds behind the show themselves have these kind of debates all the time. In one commentary track Doc references a heated argument they had about what woman was hotter: Fiona Apple or Jewel. Another time on a convention panel, a fan wanted to know their opinions on the Lizzie Borden v. Anne Frank debate but accidentally asked their opinions on a Helen Keller v. Anne Frank debate. The results can be seen here at 6:49.
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Saturday Night Live once did a commercial parody where a married couple argue over whether "New Shimmer" is a floor cleaner or a dessert topping. They end up struggling for the bottle and the husband calls his wife a cow. The pitchman arrives and settles the dispute. It's both.
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One book informs us that, when they were younger, Jake and Marco would spend entire afternoons arguing about whether or not cheese tastes yellow (Marco thought it tasted sorta green). Now that they're older, they have more serious, adult debates, like Who Would Win: Spider-Man or Batman?
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The debate over the capitalization of Star Trek Into Darkness (whether it should be "Star Trek into Darkness" or "Star Trek Into Darkness") eventually topped 70,000 words (that's longer than the first Harry Potter book). xkcd pointed out the absurdity of it.
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Surviving The World has a convenient guide to these arguments.
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SpongeBob SquarePants had a more or less literal example of this, when Patchy the Pirate and Potty the Parrot get into an argument of whether "Prehistory" or "The Future" is better.
The episode "The Battle of Bikini Bottom" begins with two war reenactors explaining to SpongeBob and Patrick the titular battle, which was apparently fought over washing one's hands.note Keep in mind however that it was Patrick who said this. This starts the two friends discussing cleanliness (SpongeBob is pro-clean, Patrick is not), and soon engage in a battle of their own.
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In the Splatoon series, the Inklings have entire large scale celebrations called Splatfests solely dedicated to taking simple debates like dogs vs. cats, rock vs. pop, lemon tea vs. milk tea, sandcastles vs. snowmen or Autobots vs. Decepticons and having people from both sides deciding who's better via nighttime ink battles, complete with an all-night party and religious undertones through the Cargo Cult fax machine used to announce them. Splatoon 3 ups the ante by making these three-sided debates. Furthermore, the final Splatfest of each game helps determines the plot and theming of the following installment.
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Perhaps the silliest: what nationality is The Spy from Team Fortress 2? note It's not entirely silly, as—with the exception of the Pyro—every other character has a clear national stereotype. The edit wars went on for months before "Meet the Spy" finally settled the issue with a canon answer: "French".
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In one episode of Sealab 2021, the entire crew of Sealab get caught up in an argument about the hypothetical possibility of transferring their minds into robot bodies. So caught up that they don't notice that all of Sealab's safety systems are catastrophically failing.
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On another occasion, Ted and Barney have a passionate argument initially framed as simply Edward vs Jacob. It's immediately revealed not to be about shipping but what the first name of the actor who played the main character in Stand and Deliver was (Edward James Olmos).
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Diary of a Wimpy Kid: In The Deep End, Greg goes fishing with a group of kids who get into a heated argument over whether it would be more difficult to fight a person with the head of a shark or a shark with the head of a person.
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South Park has an episode where two Star Trek nerds intensely debate as to whether a two-parter counted as one or two episodes, overshadowing their co-invention of a time machine.
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The bar is also divided over The Munsters and The Addams Family, which they consider Serious Business.
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French Baguette Intelligence: Many of French Baguette Intelligence's videos feature people arguing passionately over topics like this.
The Typical French vs English Debate videos feature Fuck Cares and Bowl trying to prove that their country is better than the other, by citing random facts about military history, alliances, linguistics and throwing around random insults.
Geography Makes No Sense... is about how many continents there are.
Does pineapple go on pizza? is about whether pineapple pizza is objectively bad.
Do Irish-Americans exist? is about whether Irish-Americans exist.
Is Lightning McQueen trans? is about whether Lightning McQueen is male, female or transgender.
Mister Incredible vs Darth Vader Debate is a hypothetical fight debate about whether Mr. Incredible would beat Darth Vader.
Twitter Bios Are Coded Messages is about whether a random Twitter bio is a coded message that predicts the state of the COVID-19 pandemic.
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The Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode "Life Serial" has The Trio arguing passionately about James Bond movies. Warren favours Sean Connery and loathes Moonraker, Jonathan prefers Roger Moore, while Andrew likes Timothy Dalton.
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SpaceBattles.com has an entire discussion forum dedicated to precisely this issue.
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Guys Being Dudes: Arlo and Candela had a Pokemon battle once over her saying This War Is Ours was superior to Dying Is Your Latest Fashion.
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In How I Met Your Mother, Ted brings a picture that could either be a rabbit or a duck to make a point about how a date might seem right for someone but turn out to be wrong, and vice versa. Then the gang disagrees over which represented the bad choice, the duck or the rabbit. According to Older Ted, it was the longest, most intense argument they've ever had. It even drags in their regular limo driver and by the end, Marshall is drenched in sweat.
When Barney and Robin date each other, their relationship seems to be full of these sorts of arguments. Barney once dared Robin to stab a knife through his chest over a fight about which of them should clean the dishes.
One episode had the gang argue over which food is the most common in the United States; they looked up the answer and it turned out they were all wrong.
On another occasion, Ted and Barney have a passionate argument initially framed as simply Edward vs Jacob. It's immediately revealed not to be about shipping but what the first name of the actor who played the main character in Stand and Deliver was (Edward James Olmos).
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The Guinness World Records was created specifically to end pub debates about the biggest/strongest/fastest whatever.
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Night Court had a case involving a riot at a Star Trek convention between fans over which was better: the Original Series or the Next Generation. The Next-Gen fans leave the court by...beaming out.
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Comedy Tropes
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