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Mills and Boon Prose

 Mills and Boon Prose
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 Mills and Boon Prose
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose
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MillsAndBoonProse
 Mills and Boon Prose
comment
The traditional way of handling sex in a Romance Novel; Purple Prose to IKEA Erotica's Beige Prose. Physical actions and sensations are conveyed via vague euphemisms or even overblown metaphors —while emotions are described in excessive, abstract Purple Prose. Often one suspects that the writer wishes they were participating in the scene. A sure sign that you've got one of these is when abstract nouns are used to refer to genitalia.
Popularly associated with, but not limited to, sex scenes. Any interaction between the main characters is fair game for this sort of emotionally charged description.
This is becoming rare in real romances, which are beginning to eschew floweriness for prose that's either more direct, even crass, or else down-to-earth, maybe even funny. However, Mills and Boon Prose lives on in parodies, often used to invoke Innocent Innuendo. It also occurs in fictional documents as a form of Stylistic Suck. Can involve Anatomically Impossible Sex. If a character uses this trope in first-person narration, that goes under Thinks Like a Romance Novel.
 Mills and Boon Prose
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2024-01-21T23:15:16Z
 Mills and Boon Prose
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2024-01-21T23:15:16Z
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Dropped link to PurpleProse: Not an Item - FEATURE
 Mills and Boon Prose
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 Mills and Boon Prose
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Dropped link to TropeNamer: Not an Item - UNKNOWN
 Mills and Boon Prose
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Dropped link to exaggeratedtrope: Not an Item - FEATURE
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DBTropes
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_136770ce
type
Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_136770ce
comment
The one and (thankfully) only sex scene in Vurt by Jeff Noon is described entirely in a metaphor of a garden getting filled with sap. The best that can be said of it is that it's short.
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Mills and Boon Prose
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Used in Flowers for Algernon in the sex scene between Charlie and Alice. It works because it's used to show how different it is when he's with a woman he loves rather than when he's just with a woman who enjoys sex.
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 Flowers for Algernon
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_225c51e0
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_225c51e0
comment
Also parodied in The Naked Gun 2½:
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_225c51e0
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 The Naked Gun
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_36b1cefd
comment
The guidance counsellor from 10 Things I Hate About You tries writing one of these when not busy in her office. Hopefully the only time the word "bratwurst" is used in an erotic novel ever.
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_36b1cefd
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 10 Things I Hate About You
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_3a5bdc12
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_3a5bdc12
comment
Fanny Hill: Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure may be the Trope Maker. Partly justified in this case, in that the author was essentially winning a bet, writing the lewdest book he could without using any dirty words.
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_3a5bdc12
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_3cc40e40
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_3cc40e40
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Everyday Heroes: Dinah Might writes her Villainous Crush on Mr. Mighty into her romance novel in a scene where she imagines the hero capturing and having his way with her.
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_3e1b9608
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The Mists of Avalon, so very much. It ends up giving the scenes in question a poetic, soulful tone.
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_3e1b9608
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 The Mists of Avalon
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_46ad00ea
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Manhattan Love Story: Dana has to edit a "light porn" novel that's full of turgid phrases. With the help of the other characters she manages to edit it into something better.
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_60e46926
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Mills and Boon Prose
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MAD suggested a Danielle Steel novelization of QVC:
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_60e46926
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_7680545c
comment
Implied in an episode of The Nanny, when Brighton looks up from a book he found lying around and asks: "Dad, what exactly are a person's loins, and how do you make them quiver?"
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 The Nanny
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_78fa0f35
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_78fa0f35
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Every single line of My Inner Life that is not Beige Prose or Costume Porn.
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_78fa0f35
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 My Inner Life / Fan Fic
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_80a922a6
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_80a922a6
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In Lethal Weapon 4, Ebony Clarke's writing is this all the way, but it apparently sells very well.
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_80a922a6
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 Lethal Weapon 4
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_923dd091
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_923dd091
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CollegeHumor reinterprets college course texts as cheap bodice rippers.
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_95caf5b8
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The Fountainhead. Specifically, the rape scene.
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_95caf5b8
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_976efc02
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_976efc02
comment
In one episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000, Mrs. Forrester gets sick and asks Crow to read to her from a book called "Love's Sweet Throbbing Gondola". He does, getting more and more uncomfortable with each sentence of the flowery sex scene he recites.
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_976efc02
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_a4420d22
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_a4420d22
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The Venture Bros. showed that this could also be used for The Talk in the episode "Victor. Echo. November." One might need an unabridged dictionary to even begin to unravel the metaphors.
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_a4420d22
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_a6dfeba3
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_a6dfeba3
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Forbiden Fruit: The Tempation of Edward Cullen: MANCARROT. Which is still a nicer choice of words than calling Edward's penis a "throbbing lavender man-fruit thing" and Jacob's a "horrible wet mushroom"!
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 Forbiden Fruit: The Tempation of Edward Cullen / Fan Fic
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Mills and Boon Prose
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In Questionable Content, Jimbo writes his trashy romance novels in a voice that verges on Stylistic Suck:
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_ac4b6a62
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_b0183e04
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_b0183e04
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This is the favoured writing style of Garth Marenghi and Dean Learner:
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_b0183e04
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 Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_c3cf76ea
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_c3cf76ea
comment
Stray uses a variation of this. There are no throbbing manhoods or heaving bosoms, but the first sex scene includes at least two separate extended metaphors for the POV character's emotional state.
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_c3cf76ea
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_cb7392b7
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A Court of Thorns and Roses: It's not so present in the first book, but the sex scenes become increasingly loaded with grandiose metaphors and descriptors.
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_cb7392b7
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_cfd860dd
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_cfd860dd
comment
Nasuverse sex scenes are commonly a mild form of this (more so in Tsukihime than the later Fate/stay night). Oddly, they're also written in first-person perspective...
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Mills and Boon Prose
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On an episode of QI, it is lamented that there are no attractive slang words for a woman's genitals. Until "twinkle cave" is suggested...
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_d4fe015f
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_f01c04e9
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_f01c04e9
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R15: The protagonist is a porn writer. He does this often, in a light novel that does this just as often.
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_f1bb5b46
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_f1bb5b46
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Parodied in this The Real Ghost Busters story: Sweet Temptation. It turns out to be Slimer watching a cooking show.
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_f1bb5b46
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 The Real Ghostbusters
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 Mills and Boon Prose / int_f6c05e8e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Mills and Boon Prose / int_f6c05e8e
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An early episode of Friends has Rachel attempt to write some ("Do you think his 'love stick' can be liberated from its 'denim prison'?"), inspired by Chandler's mother, who writes them professionally. Luckily for the broadcasters, she's a terrible speller so the others can openly mock her typos; the female character is apparently in possession of "heaving beasts", while the man at one point whips out his "huge throbbing pens".
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Mills and Boon Prose
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Impenetrable Walls being a Chinese Palace Drama, a man wouldn't do something as vulgar as shoving his penis into his partner's hole. No, he will sheathe his jade stalk into his partner to make her flower bloom and fill her cauldron with his yang energy. Such flowery descriptions actually prevent Wei Wuxian to understand the Imperial Brother wishes to sleep with him, as everyone just keep couching it in poetic euphemisms he cannot understand.
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 Impenetrable Walls (Fanfic)
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The following is a list of statements referring to the current page from other pages.

 Mills and Boon Prose
processingCategory2
Literary Tropes
 Mills and Boon Prose
processingCategory2
Romance Novel Tropes
 Mills and Boon Prose
processingCategory2
Sex Tropes
 How to Write Badly Well (Blog) / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 My Inner Life / Fan Fic / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Sonic High School (Fanfic) / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Splint (Fanfic) / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 The Legend of Total Drama Island (Fanfic) / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Cáca Milis / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Lethal Weapon 4 / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 10 Things I Hate About You / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 The Lonely Guy / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Earth's Children / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Flowers for Algernon / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Hotel Oriente / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 How NOT to Write a Novel / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Tempting Hymn / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Two By Two / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose
 IkeaErotica
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Mills and Boon Prose
 MasoTey
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Mills and Boon Prose
 Manhattan Love Story / int_67d5984e
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Mills and Boon Prose