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Of Course I Smoke

 Of Course I Smoke
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 Of Course I Smoke
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke
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OfCourseISmoke
 Of Course I Smoke
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Someone who doesn't smoke is, for whatever reason, trying to act like they do. They light the cigarette, take a big drag and...
COUGH COUGH COUGH GAGGHHHH!
This, of course, completely ruins the act. Most commonly done by teenagers trying to look cool, but sometimes done by adults in order to maintain The Masquerade. Compare Of Course I'm Not a Virgin.
 Of Course I Smoke
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2024-01-25T04:44:16Z
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2024-01-25T04:44:16Z
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 Of Course I Smoke / int_1aa9d9f4
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_1aa9d9f4
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The old Batman (1966) TV show used this when Robin/Dick was trying to infiltrate a gang of "delinquents".
 Of Course I Smoke / int_1aa9d9f4
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 Of Course I Smoke / int_1aa9d9f4
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Of Course I Smoke / int_1aa9d9f4
 Of Course I Smoke / int_1c1885de
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_1c1885de
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Happens with the female journalist Raffles hires to help run his sporting magazine in "The Raffles Bombshell" by Barry Perowne:
 Of Course I Smoke / int_1c1885de
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Of Course I Smoke
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In Monster, the 9-year-old Dieter tries to impress a bunch of men at a bar by entering smoking a cigarette, ordering a drink, slurping it up, and leaving the bar. Once outside, he rushes to an alley to cough and puke, wondering why adults do those things.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_1f0fe64e
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Of Course I Smoke / int_1f0fe64e
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_22d87fc9
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When Donna was going through her rebellious phase on That '70s Show, she asked Eric to hold her cigarette while she looked through her purse for something. Unfortunately, they're still in the school parking lot, and a teacher comes over and sees Eric with it. Donna's quick to take responsibility, but Eric waves her off so she won't get in trouble. Though it's downplayed, in that he doesn't have a massive coughing fit. He does smoke (pot), and another episode showed that his mom and at least one of his friends do smoke cigarettes, so it's not a total shock to his system.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_22d87fc9
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Of Course I Smoke
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The Simpsons:
In "Homer vs. Patty and Selma", Patty and Selma are caught smoking at work and are about to be fired. Homer, initially gleeful about this, sees Marge's distress and gallantly claims that both of their cigarettes are his and smokes them, claiming between coughs and gags that he is "in flavor country." Surprisingly, their boss buys it.
In "El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer (The Mysterious Voyage of Homer)", Marge (a nonsmoker) claims she "just felt like filling the house with the rich, satisfying smell of tobacco." She's trying to overwhelm the smell of the chili cook-off so Homer won't go to it. Later we get this exchange:
Also happens in "Brother's Little Helper" to Ned Flanders as he and Maude play hippies in a fire safety play. Though his cough from smoking is the least of his problems as he inadvertently sets his pants ablaze.
Parodied in "The Great Money Caper". After failing to con Flanders, Homer and Bart hide in the treehouse, where Grampa is waiting for them in a dark corner with a pipe.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_261c8d3f
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_267cbfa
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In Dominic Deegan, the titular character does this to himself. He lights his pipe, inhales, and... discovers that when his white mage brother Gregory healed him earlier, he also cured his smoking habit.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_267cbfa
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Of Course I Smoke
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A variation occurs in Full House; Stephanie is offered a cigarette by her peers, and she declines, saying she's trying to quit.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_2858b08a
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Of Course I Smoke
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Peggy (before she started smoking) and Pete have both done this on Mad Men. Peggy also chokes on a drink to a similar effect while trying to act like a flashy Manhattanite for a blind date. ("My friend Joan orders them for me. They're usually sweeter.")
 Of Course I Smoke / int_33fdae4d
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Of Course I Smoke / int_33fdae4d
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_34834a5c
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Kickassia has a scene where as part of Bennett the Sage' as Surgeon General's new health campaign several of the reviewers try to smoke and immediately start coughing. Brad Jones' commentary points out that you can tell by the way he holds the cigarette that Paw Dugan is the only one who actually smokes in real life.
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Of Course I Smoke / int_34834a5c
 Of Course I Smoke / int_3f5987ff
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Of Course I Smoke
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A Million Ways to Die in the West: Albert attempts to smoke a roll-up cigarette with Anna. After coughing, he admits he has never smoked before.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_3f5987ff
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Of Course I Smoke / int_3f5987ff
 Of Course I Smoke / int_400469e
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_400469e
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In Calvin and Hobbes, Calvin tries smoking a cigarette. At the end of the strip, Calvin comments that it was trusting parents that caused him to smoke and therefore damage his health. It should be noted that his mom knew this trope was coming and let Calvin smoke in order to teach him a lesson.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_400469e
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Of Course I Smoke / int_400469e
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Of Course I Smoke
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Anna does this once in My Sister's Keeper when she's in the car with Jesse.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_463672a8
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Of Course I Smoke / int_463672a8
 Of Course I Smoke / int_489ce4ff
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Of Course I Smoke
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In The Legend of Zorro, Elana gets rid of Armand so she can talk to Alejandro by asking him to buy her a pipe. Much later, after she and Armand have had dinner, a servant brings "her" pipe. Initially, she says she needs her stomach to settle first, but when she needs an excuse to be out on the balcony, she's forced to light up.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_489ce4ff
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Of Course I Smoke
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In the Small Wonder episode "Smoker's Delight", Jamie experimented with tobacco in hope of becoming more popular as a freshman in junior high school.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_4a64b81b
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Of Course I Smoke / int_4a64b81b
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Of Course I Smoke
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On The Wonder Years, in an episode where the Arnold family goes on a vacation at a lake house, Kevin tries to flirt with a girl who smokes that he just met by showing that he smokes, too, resulting in a coughing fit.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_5392bc91
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Of Course I Smoke / int_5392bc91
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Of Course I Smoke
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The Raccoons: In "Join the Club!", when Bert catches Lisa smoking cigarettes with Donna, Lisa lies that she's been smoking for months. However, after Donna offers her a light, she immediately coughs up smoke.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_5400d19
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Of Course I Smoke
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The Nostalgia Critic attempts a moment of suave smoking during a parody of The Twilight Zone, only to collapse in a coughing fit.
But subverted and justified in his review of Double Team, where he lights up a cigarillo in celebration of the film's climax. Cigarillos are classed as less harmful than cigarettes, as you don't inhale; you just keep the smoke in your mouth and breathe out.
Kickassia has a scene where as part of Bennett the Sage' as Surgeon General's new health campaign several of the reviewers try to smoke and immediately start coughing. Brad Jones' commentary points out that you can tell by the way he holds the cigarette that Paw Dugan is the only one who actually smokes in real life.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_6276800c
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Of Course I Smoke / int_6276800c
 Of Course I Smoke / int_63213484
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_63213484
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In Persepolis, Marjane steals a cigarette from her uncle's stash and smokes it in protest of her mother punishing her for skipping school. She admits that it tastes awful, but finishes it anyway and claims that it was her first step toward adulthood.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_63213484
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Of Course I Smoke / int_63213484
 Of Course I Smoke / int_68feb0fc
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_68feb0fc
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In Thoroughly Modern Millie, Millie does this to act casually outside of a Chinese opium den. It didn't end well.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_68feb0fc
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 Of Course I Smoke / int_68feb0fc
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Of Course I Smoke / int_68feb0fc
 Of Course I Smoke / int_727850de
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_727850de
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In Smokey and the Bandit, Sally Field's character, Frog, takes up smoking the Bandit's cigarettes, and is obviously a non-smoker.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_727850de
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Of Course I Smoke / int_727850de
 Of Course I Smoke / int_7884ec15
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_7884ec15
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On Seinfeld, George tried this to get out of the planned marriage with Susan. It doesn't work, either.
Another time, Kramer tries to get close to Jerry's accountant, who he thinks is a coke addict, by sitting at the bar smoking a cigarette and chugging a glass of beer. While he claims he chain smokes, it's very obvious he's not used to it.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_7884ec15
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Of Course I Smoke / int_7884ec15
 Of Course I Smoke / int_78fc0025
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_78fc0025
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Donna does this in the first season of Twin Peaks. Apparently, she's the only person in her high school who doesn't smoke.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_78fc0025
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 Of Course I Smoke / int_78fc0025
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Of Course I Smoke / int_78fc0025
 Of Course I Smoke / int_7ff1606c
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_7ff1606c
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Happens in a flashback in Mobile Suit Gundam: The Origin when an underage Crowley Hamon is trying to look cool at the nightclub where Lady Astrea (Char and Sayla's future mother) works.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_7ff1606c
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Of Course I Smoke / int_7ff1606c
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_82439e64
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The Office (US): Michael lights up a cigar when Pam gives birth, before being told to put it out by a doctor. Later, he lights up again and immediately starts coughing.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_82439e64
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Of Course I Smoke / int_82439e64
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_82bb0446
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The first time Pudge smokes in Looking for Alaska, he tries to act cool about it and then nearly coughs up a lung, though he ends up smoking pretty regularly.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_82bb0446
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 Of Course I Smoke / int_82bb0446
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Of Course I Smoke
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Death in Paradise: In "The Stakes are High", D.I. Mooney and the team are reacting to the events leading up to the death of the Victim of the Week. Mooney, who is playing the role of the victim, lights up a cigar — as the victim had done — and immediately starts coughing.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_8c05f749
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Of Course I Smoke
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In The Cleveland Show, Tim the bear becomes an evil boss so Cleveland has to smoke to get a break.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_8dba224e
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 Of Course I Smoke / int_8dba224e
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Of Course I Smoke / int_8dba224e
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_8dd0bbcc
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Esme Squalor in A Series of Unfortunate Events is obsessed with what is "in", and in the 10th book, she smokes what she thinks are cigarettes (they're actually flares), and despite bluntly stating she hates the smell, the taste, and the fact that they're bad for you, she remains on the hunt for more to smoke which the Baudelaires use to bait her.
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Of Course I Smoke / int_8dd0bbcc
 Of Course I Smoke / int_9a67b688
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_9a67b688
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In the 11th Detective Conan film, Detective Conan Film 11: Jolly Roger in the Deep Azure, Detective Takagi tricks a suspect into giving him his fingerprint by asking him for a light and pocketing the matchbook the suspect hands him.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_9a67b688
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 Case Closed (Manga)
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Of Course I Smoke / int_9a67b688
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Of Course I Smoke
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Greg did this in The Brady Bunch. Ironically, Barry Williams (who played Greg) had just quit when they did the episode, which made him start up again.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_9f1766e4
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Of Course I Smoke / int_9f1766e4
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Of Course I Smoke
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On Futurama, Kif does this, causing incredible reactions from his alien body.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_a183d57f
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Of Course I Smoke / int_a183d57f
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Of Course I Smoke
 Of Course I Smoke / int_a6658fee
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In The Hunt for Red October, the first meeting between the Soviet officers and the Americans is tense and silent. Jack Ryan breaks the tension by asking for a cigarette from Chief Engineer Melekhin, even though Ryan had refused cigarettes over the course of the film. His cough amuses the Soviets and lightens the mood for them to begin talking.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_a6658fee
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Of Course I Smoke / int_a6658fee
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Of Course I Smoke
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In one recent sketch on Saturday Night Live, one candidate for the Covid vaccine (Bowen Yang) tries to convince the panel he smokesnote Being a smoker was one way to get pushed up the waiting list for the vaccine.. The panel is not fooled for a second.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_b0fc9724
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Of Course I Smoke / int_b0fc9724
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Of Course I Smoke
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The Suicide Squad: After being arrested, Bloodsport bums a cigarette off one of his captors and leans forward for the man to light it because his hands are cuffed behind his back. While smoking, he gets into a conversation with the soldier. This is part of plan to stage an escape, and after the guards are neutralized, he spits out the cigarette with a disgusted look on his face and mutters "I don't smoke".
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Of Course I Smoke
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In Love Hina, Keitaro attempts to smoke at one point in the manga after failing his exams. He immediately begins coughing and spluttering.
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Desperately Seeking Susan: Roberta, suffering from amnesia and finding some cigarettes among "her" stuff, decides she must be a smoker and lights one up. Coughing ensues. (The tobacco company that had paid for the Product Placement asked for their money back.)
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Of Course I Smoke
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In The Hunt for Red October, Jack Ryan was an occasional smoker: Smoke for a while, quit for a while, but never more than two or three a day at his worst. He tries to break the tension of the initial meeting between Americans and Russians by bumming a smoke off the Russian engineer. He immediately begins coughing; fortunately, this provides the levity needed to break the ice. The Russian cigarette was described as "like smoking asphalt through a cardboard tube."note This description suggests the engineer smokes Belomorkanal or a similar brand of unfiltered cigarette, which does indeed come with a cardboard tube the end user is supposed to shape into a holder
Done intentionally in The Film of the Book. Ryan takes a single drag, and there's a moment of silence before the engineer says, in Russian, "He's turning green!" and Ryan hacks and wheezes.
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Of Course I Smoke
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Variation in Being There. Chance and Ben Rand are having an after-dinner discussion and the latter enjoys a cigar. Chance has a habitual tendency to imitate what he sees others do, so he tries to do the same, but finds he cannot light it — as he didn't see Ben slicing off the tip of his cigar beforehand. Ben doesn't notice his problem, but Dr. Allenby does, furthering his suspicions about who Chance really is.
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Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Vampire Harmony tries smoking because she is a villain after all. Moments later she starts coughing, ruining the whole thing (her inability to become a genuine menace is a Running Gag).
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Of Course I Smoke
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Happens on Puberty Blues when the Alpha Bitch offers the two protagonists a cigarette as a thank you for not turning her in for cheating and, wanting to be in with the cool girls, they accept.
 Of Course I Smoke / int_e62d72b7
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Of Course I Smoke
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The plot of the Family Guy episode "Secondhand Spoke" starts when Peter tries to pick up smoking to get breaks at work.
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Of Course I Smoke
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Rigsby in The Mentalist smokes a high-grade joint while undercover as a pot baron. Amazingly, his reaction doesn't blow his cover.
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In Breaking Bad, Walter White bums a cigarette from Jesse Pinkman in an attempt at conviviality. It's obvious that Walter has never smoked a cigarette in his life.
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Katawa Shoujo plays with this in Rin's route. She asks for cigarettes as inspiration and winds up smoking in the studio with Hisao. She makes a note of never having smoked cigarettes before, but doesn't cough when she inhales "Never having smoked cigarettes" may be Exact Words... Hisao does though.
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In Frasier, Niles ends up pretending that he came outside to smoke, too embarrassed to admit that he and his brother couldn't get tickets and are waiting for them in the cancellation line.
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In an episode of Friends, Rachel tries to take up smoking because her boss and other assistant make all their decisions in the smoker's lounge. She is not successful.
In the third episode Joey is rehearsing for a play where his character asks for a cigarette before being executed. He drops the lighter and coughs after a single puff. As Chandler used to smoke he decides to show Joey how to do it properly which leads to him falling Off the Wagon for the rest of the episode.
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But subverted and justified in his review of Double Team, where he lights up a cigarillo in celebration of the film's climax. Cigarillos are classed as less harmful than cigarettes, as you don't inhale; you just keep the smoke in your mouth and breathe out.
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You Can't Do That on Television: Touched on in the (first) "Smoking" episode. At the end of the show, Moose gives special thanks to Les Lye, a nonsmoker who, being the only adult on the show, had to do all the smoking required for the sketches. Les steps out of character as Ross the floor manager to directly address the camera. Looking slightly ill, he bluntly states "I can't believe that people actually pay to smoke cigarettes, and I will never do it again". Les Lye was in fact a former smoker who had quit several years earlier.
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Star Trek: The Next Generation: Captain Picard in the season one episode "The Big Goodbye", during his first time on the holodeck as Dixon Hill. He takes a drag on a cigarette very suavely, and then chokes and puts it down. He may have become more accustomed to smoking, though, because later on in the series he smokes as Hill again, with no trouble. Or maybe since it was on the holodeck, Picard just changed the settings to make it less realistic.
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The following is a list of statements referring to the current page from other pages.

 Of Course I Smoke
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Comedy Tropes
 Of Course I Smoke
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Index Failure
 Of Course I Smoke
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The Smoking Section
 Of Course I Smoke
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This Is Your Index on Drugs
 Perfect Masks MHA (Fanfic) / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
 Shadows Over Hell (Fanfic) / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
 Whatever Happened to Battle Fist? (Fanfic) / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
 Curse of the Pink Panther / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
 Desperately Seeking Susan / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
 I Don't Want to Be a Man / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
 The Hunt for Red October / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
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Of Course I Smoke
 Black Widowers / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
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Of Course I Smoke
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Of Course I Smoke
 Death in Paradise / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
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Of Course I Smoke
 Hitmen (2020) / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
 The Thick of It / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
 The Waltons / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
 You Can't Do That on Television / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
 The Path (Video Game) / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke
 Tales of the Wizard of Oz / int_edf0331d
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Of Course I Smoke