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Poor Man's Porn
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There are some things that all humans need from time to time. Apart from food, shelter and love...they need sex, or failing that, at least porn. Unfortunately, it's not always so easy to come by, even as an adult — maybe it's a more straitlaced era where pornography is uncommon or hard to come by even for the most resourceful people (or maybe you can come by it, but you can't talk about it on television!) Or maybe the urge, shall we say, has only just set in and there's no actual pornography nearby. What to do? The obvious answer is "find something that's almost as good and work with that". After all, if it works, it works. There are three main variants of this trope. Educational Porn: Thanks to National Geographic Nudity, something containing nude or scantily clad people that is intended for cultural or educational purposes can be co-opted for titillation. National Geographic magazines are the most commonly cited here, for obvious reasons. Never mind that the photo subjects have no reason to adhere to Western beauty standards, resulting in floppy breasts, tribal piercings, and so on; a 13-year-old boy is not picky when the urge is upon him. Similarly, workout tapes with scantily clad women, sporting events, nudist magazines and marital "how-to" guides also fall into this category, and were even sometimes slyly marketed as "legitimate porn" in the past. A particularly extreme variant of the above is Religious porn: Many religions have holy texts containing at least some sexual content (for example, the Song of Songs in The Bible), as well as teachings that condemn your soul for the idea of doing what that makes you think of doing. Generally used in media to portray a character struggling under a deeply religious upbringing, or to make fun of the hypocrisy of the religious. It is also the most 'moral' of all the possible material used for this, and therefore the easiest to plausibly disguise if a character is caught doing it. Religious porn has a long history in the art world, with many a Renaissance erotic nude being nominally a handsome Israelite hero or a beautiful female saint or Adam and Eve - modern perusal of Michelangelo can feel more Educational than Religious. Due to the guilt being a big part of what makes this trope funny (as well as a turn-on for many), finding it in the context of religions with more sexually positive views is far more rare, but jokes about the illustrations in the Kama Sutra are in no way uncommon. Advertising Porn: Because Sex Sells, advertising is usually full of slightly erotic and suggestive images — so why not make use of that? While there's no nudity, lingerie/underwear catalogues and similar can be used for somewhat more sexual purposes than they (supposedly) were intended. And where some fetishes are concerned, it doesn't have to be the least bit risqué; someone with a foot fetish can make do with a furniture ad if the person on the couch is attractive and barefoot. In some countries with more relaxed attitudes than the Anglosphere, advertising may feature nudity. This sometimes leads to the phenomenon of English-language TV shows about the weirdness of foreign advertising — which can feature healthy doses of Fanservice. Scrambled Porn: Mostly seen in shows from the 80's and 90's, as newer technology has made it obsolete, a character will try to make out a pay-per-view television program—porn in this case—that has been scrambled by the cable provider because the character hasn't paid for it. Every so often they might claim to see a nipple...wait no those are her eyes. This particular variant died out in the late 90's with the rise of satellite TV and digital cable. Nowadays you'll simply get a blank screen if you turn to a channel you're not subscribed to or a pay-per-view program you haven't bought. If scrambled porn was before your time, you can get an idea of what it looked like with this Safe For Work YouTube video of scrambled Discovery Channel here: Scrambled Cable Channel. You can see how the occasional recognizable object would come into sight. Still Truth in Television. Before the Internet rose in the 1990s - 2000s, there was a real social and physical barrier up between the average person and pornography. You actually had to go to a porn store to buy it (newstands and convenience stores only had softer stuff like Playboy), or get a catalog from which you could order it. Many people were worried to the point of paranoia that their job or church would get word that their car was seen in the parking lot of the seedy adult bookstore, or someone would see them buy Playboy at the tobacco store. And if that's how much trouble the adults had, the teens surely had it worse — usually having to locate their parents' Porn Stash when no one was home or to be lucky enough to find it in a Dumpster Dive. Times have changed because The Internet Is for Porn, and anybody with a connection can see as much porn as they like and whatever kind they like, making this a largely Forgotten Trope. Although Internet censorship is turning this into a Cyclic Trope. What has changed is the price. It used to be you not only had to go somewhere to get porn; but it was expensive, too. Nowadays anyone can have a collection that dwarfs (perhaps in more ways than one) their parents'/grandparents' stashes — in an evening — and all fitting on an easily-stashed USB key. However, the underage may still have trouble secretly accessing porn if their internet usage is closely monitored by a parent who is tech savvy enough to prevent the workarounds that usually foil more clueless parents, or if they don't own a computer in the first place, or if they're still on 56K dial-up or DSL. All of the above aside, some people just have very unusual tastes. They can find everything from certain types of clothing to certain types of professions or skills to be turn-ons when most people wouldn't. In British Media, this trope is still prevalent due to Values Dissonance and Ofcom regulations including the watershed, so not entirely discredited. Subtrope of the Closest Thing We Got. A Super-Trope to National Geographic Nudity. Not to be confused with Poverty Porn, were it possible. Compare I Read It for the Articles. |
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In Super Troopers, one of the highway patrolmen/main characters uses a salacious billboard as wanking fodder during his shift. | |
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In an early Buffy episode, it's revealed that Xander regularly checks out rare occult books on witches "to look at the semi-nude engravings". | |
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Chappelle's Show presented a Parody Commercial for Third World Girls Gone Wild; the video was a documentary film of topless tribeswomen performing a presumably traditional dance. In a similar vein, Saturday Night Live had a Parody Commercial (here) for a homemade DVD featuring The Shake Weight that guys can watch as if it were porn (the Shake Weight is real, but it's probably not intended to titillate in that fashion). |
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In the 1970's, a sub-genre of pornographic films popped up known as "White Coaters". In the legal battles regarding the obscenity charges laid against I Am Curious (Yellow), the Supreme Court ruled that a film cannot be obscene if it has educational merit. White Coaters tried to exploit this by having the film be introduced by an actor in a white coat claiming to be a doctor or scientist, explaining that what you're about to see is absolutely meant for anthropological and educational use and nothing else. | |
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In the Dragon Age franchise, the leader of the setting's dominant religion (basically their version of the Pope) is the always-female Divine. The late Divine Rosamund was elected at 19 and was noted for her beauty, and as a result she was the subject of a great deal of unauthorized art and literature. | |
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Ash from Misfile admits to having used underwear catalogs the way any red-blooded American teenage boy would. Unfortunately, he finds out that his mother is one of the models. More recently, he had a large stash of actual porn before his Gender Bender situation replaced them with gender-flipped equivalents. | |
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In Soulsearchers and Company #3, one of the videos in Baraka's Porn Stash is an aerobics tape. | |
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The Doctor Blake Mysteries: In "Death of a Travelling Salesman", the presence of a large stack of bodybuilding magazines is taken as evidence that the victim was homosexual. (The show is set in the 1950s and bodybuilding magazines were the closest thing to gay porn available.) | |
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Bottom: Bottom has a running gag about Richie and occasionally Eddie masturbating to the news when read by newsreader Sue Carpenter. At one point, Eddie gives Richie a 'play telescope' for Christmas, which is a toilet roll tube with a crude drawing of Sue Carpenter in a bikini on the beach taped over one end. In one episode, Richie and Eddie get off on 'pornographic doodles' of the Queen, the Duke of Edinburgh and "Meryl Streep" that Eddie has been printing on his forged banknotes. Later, when they hand a "£27" note to the bartender, he finds himself overcome with the need to run off to the bathroom... |
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Variation in That '70s Show. Instead of National Geographic Nudity, Jackie gives Kelso a copy of Cosmo magazine so that he can get in touch with his feminine side and relate to her better. She notes that she removed the reproductive health related material so that he wouldn't get distracted by it. At the end of the episode, Kelso has found an uncensored copy of the issue, and the boys are huddled around him. What they're looking at is implied to not even be nudity, but a diagram of the reproductive system that they confuse for a map of Six Flags, which makes it even stranger that they're clearly getting off on it. | |
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Mission Hill: In "Porno For Pyro", Kevin's repression and anxiety when it comes to regular porn causes an incident that leads to the school bullies being put on trial for attempted murder, and when the whole thing is cleared up during the ending, he vows to stick to lingergie catalogues from then on. In the script for the unproduced "Supertool", it turns out that Andy's advertising firm invokes this trope using subliminal messaging; taking advantage of America's puritanical and repressive culture by inserting subtle sexual imagery in their ads, leading to a case of stealth-Sex Sells. And we do mean stealth, something as simple as mascot for a brand of canned pasta can invoke the response. |
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On Cheers, Norm subscribed to the Victoria's Secret Catalogue using the cunningly selected alias of 'Norma Peterson'. | |
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Women's magazines such as Cosmopolitan, Glamour and the like are theoretically not supposed to be wank fodder for teenage boys raiding their mom's stash, but in reality, they feature almost as many scantily-clad women as the likes of Maxim, so there you go. | |
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The Colony (2013). A teenager who grew up After the End when the world is undergoing another ice age is puzzled to find a swimsuit magazine depicting scantily-clad women frolicking in the sun. The expedition leader suggests he use it for a more pragmatic purpose. | |
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The Simpsons: In the episode "Bart vs. Australia", when the man in Antarctica tries to check which way his toilet flushes, he discovers that the water in the bowl is frozen. Another man walks into the bathroom with a swimsuit magazine and is disappointed to see. | |
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Exaggerated in Extras when a guy is Caught With His Pants Down with a novelty pen that had a picture of a pinup girl on the side. | |
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A Playboy cartoon depicts a colonial-era Puritan reading the Bible to his children, one of whom requests "the part where Abimelech looks out the window and sees Isaac 'sporting' with Rebecca." | |
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At the very beginning of Clockwise, headmaster Brian Stimpson apprehends (over a loudspeaker) a group of boys who are looking at some pictures. They then drop the pictures, briefly revealing they are of naked women. | |
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In the episode of Beavis And Butthead where the titular duo become magazine telemarketers, during their interview, Butthead asks if they'll be selling adult magazines. Beavis gives the example of National Geographic. | |
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Mad Men: Ken tells a story about, when he was a teenager, going to see an "educational" movie about sex that was obviously thinly-veiled porn. He saw one of his teachers there, but it set up a situation of "mutually-assured destruction"; neither of them could get the other in trouble for going to the movie without exposing that they were there, too. | |
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In the Red Dwarf novel Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers Rimmer calls out his double on their habit of being aroused by pictures of Renaissance paintings. | |
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Peep Show features an episode where Jez decides to make some money by donating his sperm. Because the clinic has not provided him with any porn to get him in the mood, he's forced to improvise with the only thing he has on him — a five pound note with a picture of a young Queen Elizabeth II on it ... | |
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When the wizards are exploring the Professor of Cruel and Unusual Geography's study in The Last Continent, a couple of them become very interested in some of the books with illustrations of islanders who "exist in a state of Nature within their own skin". | |
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In the Laura Caxton series, Laura uses this as "The Reason You Suck" Speech: the vampire who's trying to kill her used to be, and psychologically still is, "a sad little man who used to jack off to the bra ads in the newspaper". | |
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Rick and Morty In The Ricks Must be Crazy, Rick and Morty are stuck three levels deep in recursive universes. This universe is relatively new, so it doesn't have any technology, and therefore, no porn. While Rick takes several weeks trying to find a way to escape back into their own universe, the teenaged Morty grows increasingly sexually frustrated, before he finally snaps and angrily demands that Rick hurries up in finding a solution, telling him the situation has taken such a toll on him that he recently masturbated to "a curvy piece of drift wood." Several episodes imply the ever-pathetic Jerry does this sort of thing a lot, with his family being utterly repulsed by it and not even remotely believing his excuses, like the Victoria's Secret he had stashed under a mattress or a mannequin leg he keeps hidden which poor Morty and Summer stumbled upon once. |
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From Cracked's The 5 Most Unexpected Things About Life at Guantanamo Bay: "This isn't to say that no one wanted that magazine for its own merits. Once a guy asked, 'Hey, in National Geographic I hear they have ... boobs, yes?'" | |
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Similar to the Calvin and Hobbes example above, there's a Get Fuzzy where Satchel quickly snags a magazine when the mail arrives and runs out of the room. Bucky comments, "Field and Stream: the Victoria's Secret Catalog for dogs." The outdoors = lots of trees = lots of places for dogs to relieve themselves? | |
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GLOW (2017): Sam Sylvia's pitch to the network for GLOW is "porn you can watch with your kids". | |
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SCP Foundation: SCP 1839 is a textbook called "The Reproductive Methods of Bony Fish" that makes the reader think they're a fish. The article for it acknowledges that the book could be used for sexual purposes (though this is discouraged), if the reader was a fish like yourself. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_42ffb88e | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
| Poor Man's Porn / int_4617a9f2 | comment |
Television shows and movies featuring exceptionally attractive actresses sometimes serve this purpose too. Shows like Married... with Children and Charlie's Angels had Ms. Fanservice characters as some of their primary appeal. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_4617a9f2 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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The Discworld Post Office Diary, in its list of prohibited items, says that the Post Office will deliver saucy, and even naughty postcards, but not rude ones. It adds that anyone unclear on the difference may, for a small fee, peruse examples of all three categories in the Post Office archives. | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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In the "DNA" episode of Red Dwarf, after Kryten gets turned into a Human, he finds that a triple-deluxe vacuum cleaner in an appliance catalogue gives him a double Polaroid. | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Exalted has Regent Fokuf, the Puppet King of the Realm, spending his private time jacking off to the holy texts of the Immaculate Order. It's basically the equivalent of reading The Bible and indulging one's self to the Song of Solomon. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_5e150650 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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The Vestal's origin comic in Darkest Dungeon shows her getting excited by religious murals in her convent, before being chastised and recoiling in shame. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_600ba53d | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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There was an article in MAD, where one of the captions showed a kid jerking off to National Geographic. All we see of the magazine is the cover: "TRIBAL WOMEN". | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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American Dad!: Roger's nude portrait of Haley that Steve had been masturbating with (it was a neck-down portrait, so he didn't know it was his sister) is sold at auction. Steve resigns to going back to "squinting really hard until stuff looks like boobs". | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_60f02ddb | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Taken to the extremes in Joe vs. Elan School. Amongst all the other ways being kept at the titular Boarding School of Horrors damaged his psyche, Joe mentions in an aside that being a hormonal teenager cooped up in a place where every expression of sexuality were strictly forbidden and would be met with punishment, including merely looking at someone of the opposite sex in the "wrong" way, made him rather desperate for any kind of way to release the tension. He remember that he frequently would flip through the math textbooks he was handed, to see if there were any female stock-photo models in them and if they had any kind of exposed skin, noting that even the sight of a female ankle would be enough to make him feel hot and bothered. | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Referenced in an episode of Dragon Ball Z Abridged where Roshi is in the middle of leering at an aerobics program when Oolong points out that he can get ACTUAL pornography from the Internet. Roshi says that being able to enjoy things like this is what separates the connoisseurs from the mere perverts. | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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The Channel Awesome group review had The Nostalgia Critic getting off to George Takei's biography. | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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In one episode of The Inbetweeners, Jay masturbates in an old people's home over the problem pages in women's magazines (which he describes as "wanking gold"). Later, when he's been through them all (even having to wank over Fern Britton), he finds a black and white photograph of a woman in a bikini. Hilarity Ensues. | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Seinfeld: In the infamous "Contest" episode, George drops something off at his parents' house when no one is home. Sitting down to wait for them, he spies one of his mother's copies of Glamour and, needing a way to kill time, decides to go to town. His mother promptly comes home and catches him in the act, which shocks her so badly she collapses and injures herself. As a result, George swears off masturbating for good, thus inspiring the creation of the titular contest. | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Possible example: Dr. Langford in BioShock mentions that the paganistic Splicers holed up in Arcadia have been breaking into her lab and stealing, among other things, her National Geographic collection and muses with disgust, "They're feathering their disgusting shrines with it, I suppose, the sick bastards." | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_791fca44 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Likely a reference to the film Murder by Death in which San Francisco-based detective Sam Diamond is questioned by his secretary about all the bodybuilder magazines he keeps at his office. "They was all suspects!" | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Ben Stiller's character uses lingerie ads during the infamous "hair gel" scene in There's Something About Mary. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_7a084b17 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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In Amélie, there's a side character who had a lingerie catalog where he'd pasted Lady Di's face over the model's. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_7a867a29 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
| Poor Man's Porn / int_7bd08715 | comment |
In Bernie, the prosecutor observes that Bernie subscribes to a men's fitness magazine without being very athletic himself. Historically, fitness and sport publications have been a source for beefcake porn for men in homophobic cultures. |
|
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| Bernie | hasFeature |
Poor Man's Porn / int_7bd08715 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Mentioned in Wyrd Sisters which clarifies that witches do not perform rituals naked and that detail was included because many books about witchcraft are written by wizards, who are men who don't get out much. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_7de1376e | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Pitch (2009): Jim masturbated over the football team in his high school yearbook, having lusted after them in secret. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_81bd05cd | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Will & Grace: Will visits a fertility clinic to donate sperm but the magazines provided are all targeted at straight men and filled with pictures of women. He asks the nurse if she has any menswear catalogues lying around he can use instead but all she has is "Martha Stewart Living" magazine. Will scoffs until he notices an article on attractive carpenters that he decides he can work with. | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Gen V: In "Jumanji" the main group find themselves trapped within Cate Dunlap's mind. A mental image of Soldier Boy shows up, bragging about how Cate, who was kept imprisoned in her room by her parents, learned to masturbate with a Soldier Boy pillow, and still does. | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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On an episode of M*A*S*H, Father Mulcahy finds that a patient has an interest in reading the Bible, only to find out from what part he's reading that it's the Song of Solomon. At that, Mulcahy politely advises he reads something in the Bible that is less... "inspirational." | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_8d814070 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Parodied in Not Another Teen Movie during the opening sequence when Janey is watching "She's All That". While not completely scrambled, it does look grainy and wavy. Watch in Spanish here. |
|
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Poor Man's Porn / int_8ec667ec | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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In Adaptation. Charlie Kaufman beats it to the picture of Susan Orlean on the back panel of her book The Orchid Thief. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_916ad40d | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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In Porky's one of the character is seen to use National Geographic to "kick start" his member for his daily measuring routine... | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_9441418c | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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The Drew Carey Show has an episode where Drew, Oswald, and Lewis try to to watch scrambled porn because Drew believes that the cable company will turn him in if he has both Cartoon Network and porn channels. It turns out it's the surgery channel they're watching, not the porn channel. |
|
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Poor Man's Porn / int_974f7efb | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Bob's Burgers: In "Carpe Museum", Zeke spends his time on a field trip to the local natural history museum showing Gene all the exhibits that have boobs in them. | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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In Deltarune, NPC classmate and part-time librarian Berdly mentions an overdue book entitled How to Draw Dragons, and describes the cover as featuring a mauve dragoness wearing lipstick and "... well, [Kris will] know it when [they] see it." Kris' own description notes that the dragoness on the cover is dressed "immodestly" and that their brother Asriel is likely not going to return it. It later crops up in Chapter 2 as one of Noelle's note who has a blatant crush on Susie, a purple dragoness interactions with a Poppupnote an enemy who, as the name implies, is based on a pop-up ad. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_9b602c3f | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Lois from Malcolm in the Middle is pleased with Stevie's influence on her boys when she sees them reading a newspaper, unaware that they're looking at the underwear ads. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_9ce851a3 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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That same joke returns in Good Omens with the character of Anathema Device, who is noted to be wearing practical clothing as opposed to this trope. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_9e876c22 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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In The Men from the Ministry it's sometimes mentioned that Mr. Lamb apparently has a habit of going up and down the Underground escalators while staring at the underwear advertisements on the walls. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_9ff7441c | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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In Twisted Toyfare Theatre, one of Dr. Doom's evil plans involved intercepting the Fantastic Four's mail just so Reed Richards wouldn't be able to get off on awkward tribal totty in National Geographic. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_a3362850 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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The Song of Solomon from The Bible is basically erotica. | |
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| The Bible | hasFeature |
Poor Man's Porn / int_a5549ed0 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
| Poor Man's Porn / int_a58ece23 | comment |
In a Big Nate strip, Nate tries to teach Spitsy to attack cats by showing him Ellen's cat calendar. Spitsy immediately runs off with it and starts drooling over it like Nate had shown him porn. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_a58ece23 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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In Questionable Content, it emerged that Dora discovered that she was bisexual because of pictures of her boyfriend Marten's mother (who works as a fetish model). | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_ac4b6a62 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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A Clockwork Orange: Alex is forced to take Bible classes as part of his rehabilitation. He mostly focuses on the passages describing bloody battles and royal concubines to imagine himself in either situation. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_ae369c06 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
| Poor Man's Porn / int_aeb10ca9 | comment |
In an early episode of Fresh Off the Boat Eddie tries to pass off a “sexual harrasment in the workplace� training video meant for his dads employees as porn to his class mates. It works, a bit too well actually and it soon starts to spread amongst the middle school populace. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_aeb10ca9 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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In a similar vein, Saturday Night Live had a Parody Commercial (here) for a homemade DVD featuring The Shake Weight that guys can watch as if it were porn (the Shake Weight is real, but it's probably not intended to titillate in that fashion). | |
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| Saturday Night Live | hasFeature |
Poor Man's Porn / int_b0fc9724 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Subverted in FoxTrot: Roger thinks Jason is growing up after he comes home from a garage sale with an armful of National Geographics. After all, why else would a young boy want them? As it turns out, the geeky Jason and Marcus want them for the articles, in particular the Apollo 11 issue. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_b3f687d1 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Not surprisingly, Robot Chicken takes a stab at it. Watch here. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_b5a087d7 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
| Poor Man's Porn / int_b61d333 | comment |
National Geographic themselves acknowledged this trope in their 1988 centennial issue. | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_b61d333 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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In The Strawberry Statement movie: "Do you remember that... National Geographic you have in your back room? Yeah, well this one is a white version of page 43." | |
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Poor Man's Porn / int_ba67bca9 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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Captain Blackadder uses a lingerie catalog. | |
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| Blackadder | hasFeature |
Poor Man's Porn / int_c19424b6 | |
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Poor Man's Porn | |
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An episode of Black Books features an audio version of this, with a subplot basically involving Fran masturbating while listening to the Shipping Forecast because she finds the voice of the man who was delivering it that evening irresistibly arousing. | |
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The Family That Dwelt Apart: As the narration relates that the only thing the Pruitts ever went to the mainland for was the mail, one of the younger Pruitts is looking at the Sears catalogue. Mainly, the brassiere section. | |
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This Bites!: After the SBS gets a visual component, Zoro's shirtless workout routine quickly becomes its most popular programming among female viewers. Cross is very annoyed by this, not least of all because he has to keep blacklisting female viewers who call in with inappropriate comments about. | |
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In the music video to "Anxiety" the boy in the evil dentist's waiting room reads the "True Police Yearbook". Headline: "So Sex Hungry - She Killed For It!" | |
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In one episode of The Wire, Landsman (who usually openly looks at much more dirty magazines at work) is seen perusing a Victoria's Secret catalogue. When asked why he made the change, he remarked, "Change of pace. They look pretty hot with their clothes on, too." | |
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976-EVIL: Early in the film Hoax can be seen reading from a National Geographic magazine for this use, but his religious mother catches him red-handed. | |
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Referenced in Gaijin Smash. | |
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Oz: Referenced in a season five episode of, when Ryan O'Reily is talking about Hawaii in the drug rehabilitation group, explaining that he read about the well-endowed women in "National Pornographic", with the impressive full-colour photographs. The inmates' favourite program is the children's TV show "Miss Sally's Schoolyard", because Miss Sally has large breasts. |
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In Time Changer, the protagonist (a Christian fundamentalist theology professor visiting from the 1800s) complains to a clothing store manager that a mannequin dressed in lingerie will "arouse impurity" among the customers. He is surprised when the manager replies that Nobody Ever Complained Before. (We don't actually see the offending display, but the store looks a lot more like Sears than Victoria's Secret.) | |
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The Bolt Chronicles: Canines seemingly consider the magazine Dog Fancy to be suitably titillating. Referenced in "The Cameo" and "The Seven." | |
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In the South Park episode "Cartman Sucks", Butters is taken to a religious camp for bi-curious boys with the intention of removing their non-heterosexual tendencies. In one scene Butters' roommate is scolded by a counselor for having a men's underwear catalog from the 1980's hidden in his dorm room. | |
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In Good Boys, Max uses a video game's Character Customization menu for this before his dad interrupts. From the looks of it, he's into the game's Amazonian Beauties. He and his friends later discover real porn, though, and are disgusted by it. | |
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In Colonel Kill Motherfuckers, Nicholas masturbates to pictures of pottery in National Geographic. And pictures of gorillas. | |
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In Kick-Ass, the protagonist is initially a nerd who is ignored by the female populace of the school and, in his own words, 'easily excitable', so National Geographic is, as shown, enough for his tastes then. | |
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Homestar Runner: Though the primary point seems to be the violence rather than the porn, in the Strong Bad Email "rated" Strong Bad, Coach Z, and Bubs watch an R-rated movie on scrambled cable. One line in the "movie" is a sexy-sounding female voice saying "Two underwears", implying that the porn is there nonetheless. | |
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Parodied in Touhou fanart: Rinnosuke finally realizes why Wriggle Nightbug was so interested in a field guide to insects. | |
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An article on setting GURPS Dungeon Fantasy games on the Discworld suggests that part of the popularity of the older Monster Compendiums published by the Order of Subterranean Taxonomy is that, after a few days underground, delvers become very interested in the sketches of succubi and sylphs. Any similarity to 80s teenagers and the first edition Dungeons & Dragons Monster Manual is entirely coincidental. | |
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In one Family Guy, when Stewie finally succeeds in derailing Peter and Lois' plans to conceive a fourth child (about twenty seconds after he stops trying), Peter takes a lingerie catalogue into the bathroom. | |
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The animals in Liberty Meadows were once seen getting excited about a nature documentary, on the mating habits of African Wild Dogs. | |
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In Dragon Ball Z, Master Roshi has been shown drooling over women's aerobics programs on television...in spite of the fact that it's been shown several times over that he owns pornographic magazines. Referenced in an episode of Dragon Ball Z Abridged where Roshi is in the middle of leering at an aerobics program when Oolong points out that he can get ACTUAL pornography from the Internet. Roshi says that being able to enjoy things like this is what separates the connoisseurs from the mere perverts. |
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The Librarians (2007) features Frances walking in on Terry, caught with his pants down, jerking off to bra ads in the newspaper. | |
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One episode of My Wife and Kids had junior escaping to the bathroom with increasingly supposedly non-sexual magazines, the height of which was an issue of a monthly cooking magazine. Cue euphemism filled explanation of just how a teenage boy can make that sexy. | |
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In Grandma's Boy (2006), Alex uses a Lara Croft action figure as visual stimulation while staying over at his friend's house due to not having access to anything better. | |
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Sports Illustrated's Swimsuit Issue started out the same way, back when the magazine was a little less rigorous on what defined "sports content" to begin with, having an issue on tropical getaways to exotic locations in the Caribbean in the middle of February seemed perfectly logical. Even as recently as the mid-90's, the Swimsuit issue still doubled as a regular issue of SI with the usual articles about sports. | |
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One episode of The Critic has lovelorn Jay Sherman fantasizing about The Statue of Liberty who he imagines seducing him and taking off her robe for him. He's quickly stopped by a police officer who points out to him a sign that forbids him from doing just that. | |
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Referenced in Frasier: Frasier talks about sharing a room with Niles and being kept up all night by the latter's looking at National Geographics under the bedcovers. When Niles asserts he was only looking at the maps, Frasier replies that this is what made it so weird. | |
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Friends: Chandler comes to visit Rachel at work so he can take a peek at the most recent catalogues. | |
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Later, Oz mentions that "if there's a channel that should be illegal it's the 'all-woman's channel lifetime supply of pantyhose or some shit." and Jim, that "Ariel, man. She's so hot!". | |
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In Episode 13 of Osomatsu-san, it's revealed that Jyushimatsu gets off to a Bug Encyclopedia (yes, of literal insects). | |
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American Pie: In the opening sequence, Jim is caught by his parents trying to watch scrambled porn. Later, Oz mentions that "if there's a channel that should be illegal it's the 'all-woman's channel lifetime supply of pantyhose or some shit." and Jim, that "Ariel, man. She's so hot!". |
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According to Encyclopedia Dramatica, Wikipedia is filling this void in the modern era - after all, someone who walks in suddenly is less likely to be bothered by you looking up something on Wikipedia than by seeing a porn website. However, since Wikipedia is not censored, it still contains a fair amount of NSFW material that can do the job. Wikipedia co-founder Larry Sanger has written an essay accusing Wikipedia of having a "porn problem". Wikimedia Commons is even worse/better, depending on your view. The Other Wiki has roughly five images per article, Commons is nothing but images. Several jurisdictions reportedly prohibited unsupervised access to Wikipedia for minors at schools just for that reason. Cracked had something to say about this with its 6 Most Terrifying Sex Illustrations on Wikipedia (Mostly work safe). |
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In the Gravity Falls episode "Scary-oke", Dipper sneaks into his Grunkle Stan's bedroom, and ends up finding a trunk full of women's fashion magazines. Dipper is rather put-off ("Ew! Pretending I never saw that..."), perhaps guessing the most-likely reason his crusty old great-uncle has back-issues of "Lady Swimwear" and "Fully-Clothed Women Magazine". | |
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The Goldbergs had this with Adam and Barry discovering a scrambled porn channel, and it becomes something of a bonding experience until they try to find a way to "fix" it... | |
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