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Screw Your Ultimatum!
- 358 statements
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The villain has the upper hand, and is being particularly smug and verbose. He may be outlining his plan, demanding the hero's surrender, his cooperation, or even offering a chance to join him. A typical villain gives the hero time (never much) to consider this proposal. But this is not always necessary. There are cases where the hero replies to the villain's ultimatum without missing a beat. This can work one of two ways: A: Usually in the form of a Shut Up, Hannibal!, a Get It Over With, or simply a giant "Fuck you," the hero tells the villain exactly where he can stick his ultimatum. Bonus points for offering a counter-ultimatum. B: The villain offers what he believes to be some sort of Sadistic Choice, which the hero makes without any thought whatsoever. (A third option may or may not be involved. If it isn't, it's usually a case of the villain being so out of touch with the hero's priorities that he gives the hero exactly what he wants.) Reasons for this may vary. The hero may have come to their conclusion before the villain was even finished speaking, or even before even getting in his current predicament, and was simply being polite in letting him finish. Or he may find the villain completely batshit and was just waiting to see if what he was hearing would get any worse. He may not be the type to think before speaking, or his situation may not be so hopeless as it seems. One way or another, the villain isn't going to get the satisfaction of watching the hero squirm. A Sister Trope to Defiant to the End and Shut Up, Hannibal! May overlap with Defiant Stone Throw, when it's an Innocent Bystander doing it. May overlap with Threat Backfire. Contrast I'm Thinking It Over!. If the villain has given someone the job of delivering this ultimatum for them, the messenger might want to beware, as this scenario can easily turn into an instance of Shoot the Messenger. Examples |
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Star Trek Online: In the backstory, Klingon Chancellor J'mpok delivered an ultimatum to the Federation to remove all Federation citizens from the disputed Hromi Cluster within three months. Federation President Aennik Okeg basically told him to go jump in a lake. | |
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In The Salvation War, the British PM responds to a demand from Satan himself for the surrender of humankind to the Legions of Hell with "Sod off, Baldrick!" | |
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Lockout. Alex (the big bad) tells Emilie to order her father (the president of the USA) to call off his attack on the space-jail that they are inside of, otherwise he'll sic his psychotic rapist brother onto her. Without missing a beat Emilie tells her father to blow the space-jail — including herself — out of the sky. | |
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Girls und Panzer: In episode 9, Pravda has the squadron cornered and requests a surrender. The response? "NUTS!"note A reference to General MacAuliffe at the Battle of Bastogne. | |
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In an episode of Castle, Detectives Ryan and Esposito are captured by the Villain of the Week and are given an Ultimatum: Tell the bad guys what they want to know and die a quick painless death or "Jerk us around, and by tomorrow, you will wish you were." They take one look at each other and respond. | |
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Cheers: During their fight at the end of series 2, Diane demands Sam not tell her to go, because otherwise she'll never return. Sam just silently glowers at her. | |
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In The Simpsons, Bart and Todd Flanders void Homer's bet on a minigolf final by declaring a draw. | |
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In Live Free or Die Hard, the Big Bad decides to capture McClane's daughter. McClane immediately calls his bluff saying that the Big Bad only did that because he was afraid of McClane and therefore too afraid to hurt her. | |
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In The Matrix, when Agent Smith has Neo arrested and interrogated before he is unplugged from the Matrix, he makes an offer to have Neo's criminal record expunged in exchange for helping him apprehend Morpheus. Neo replies to the offer by Flipping the Bird and asking for his lawyer. | |
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In Naruto, Madara is explaining his "Moon's Eye Plan", threatening the Five Kage with war if they do not cooperate and surrender the remaining two jinchuuriki. The Raikage's response is exactly what one would expect, especially considering one of the jinchuuriki is his brother. | |
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Black Panther - Near the climax of the "Who is the Black Panther?" arc, Klaw has T'Challa's mother hostage and one of his underlings is poised to collapse the Great Mound of vibranium. He tells T'Challa to kill himself in exchange for his country's safety. T'Challa retorts that he has no reason whatsoever to believe Klaw will honor his end of the deal. | |
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Two in a row in "Frostbite". Breen captain Dalsh Ruul has taken Tess and most of her away team prisoner and tries to bargain with them as hostages after Eleya blows up the Breens' ship in orbit and demands their surrender. Ruul tries to issue a counter-ultimatum to stall for time so his men can set up transporter scramblers, but Eleya refuses to negotiate. | |
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Halo 3: ODST: In Sadie's Story, Captain Dare is trying to get a NMPD officer to turn the city's Superintendent back on, which the woman explains would be violating an order from the police commissioner. Dare then threatens her, and the woman explains that even if Dare is from ONI, she is also the absolute least threatening problem she has right now. | |
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A more morally grey version occurs in Neon Genesis Evangelion. During the series, the relation between NERV and their Mysterious Backer, SEELE, gradually turn more and more sour, and by the time of The End of Evangelion it has turned into open hostility. Eventually SEELE's leader, Keel, puts forward their ultimatum to Gendo and Fuyutsuki, hand over Unit-01, the component they need to initiate their Assimilation Plot or they will destroy NERV to the last man. Gendo, both ideologically opposed to SEELE and needing Unit-01 for his own plan, rebukes them, telling them that "Death creates nothing." Keel responds with "Then you deserve death!" | |
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Let My People Grow! Brainiac warns he will level Metropolis if Superman does not turn the signal off. Superman replies he will just stop him. | |
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At the very start of Space Battleship Yamato and its remake a Gamilan fleet demands the surrender of Earth's last fleet. Okita tells the radio operator to reply "Fools!" | |
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In the finale of Inuyasha, Naraku tries to dissuade the group from attacking him when it's clear he's lost by pointing out that Kaede's village is right beneath them: if he is killed here, his body will turn into miasma and kill everything below. This does cause them to hesitate, but unfortunately for Naraku, Sesshoumaru is among his foes: "Who cares?" *swings Bakusaiga* | |
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These Foolish Things: A rare non-villain example. Upon learning Laurel still loves Oliver and seeing that Thea now holds her in contempt, Felicity issues Oliver an ultimatum over their relationship, stating that he can either have them in his life, or he could have her. Oliver, at this point understandably fed up with her behaviornote Felicity hacked into his private bank account, tracked everything that might've been a gift for Laurel while Oliver and her were dating, and went to Laurel and demanded them back, something that appalled everyone when they found out and noting it's not much of a choice considering both Laurel and Thea are practically (and in Thea's case, literally) family, chooses them, much to Felicity's disbelief and fury. | |
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Iron Man: Tony Stark has been captured by terrorists who are demanding that he reproduce his newest weapon for them. Tony responds with a blunt "I refuse". Smash Cut to Tony getting waterboarded... during which he subconsciously begins to form an escape plan. A compressed version happens later, during his One-Man Army rampage in Gulmira. Several of the terrorists try to take villagers as hostages in order to hinder his ability to repulsor-blast them. Except his suit AI is fast and accurate enough to shoot them all dead in a matter of seconds. |
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Battle Ground (2020): Harry Dresden to the White Council after they vote to expel him and give him a new suspended death sentence in absentia for using magic to kill human Fomorians during the battle. This essentially puts him back into the legal situation he was in all the way back in Storm Front. Harry, however, is in a historically bad mood after the events of the past two books, and tells Ramirez flat-out that he has officially had it with the Council's Lawful Stupidity, that he's going to continue doing whatever he has to do to protect Chicago and his loved ones, and that if the Council has a problem with it, he's still the Winter Knight so they can tell it to Queen Mab—if "the guy who soloed a Titan" doesn't come for them first. | |
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"Didn't Expect That": The Albino, outmatching USS Bajor with a Scimitar-class dreadnought, hails them to tell Eleya to give up and let herself die quickly. Eleya cusses him out in Romulannote It's left untranslated but literally means "Go fuck yourself!" and hangs up. | |
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Dies irae ~Interview with Kaziklu Bey~: Methuselah tells Reinhard and the L.D.O. that should they chase him or in any way get in his way then he will unceremoniously kill them all as they will not stand a chance. Reinhard's response? Shift Gladsheim into combat mode and rallying his troops for battle. | |
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In Turning Red, Tyler threatens to withhold the money he had promised Mei if she doesn't comply but by that point obtaining that money had become moot so Mei responds "Forget your money, and forget you!". | |
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System Shock 2: At the end, when told by SHODAN We Can Rule Together, the until then silent unnamed player character replies with a deadpan "nah" and just shoots her. | |
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Rosario Vampire: Brightest Darkness Act VI: Arial Kuyumaya does this twice. First, in chapter 13, Rason warns her that if she goes anywhere near Mizore again, she will have to answer directly to the Almighty for her actions; she promptly goes straight to Mizore's bedroom and steals her wedding ring right off Mizore's finger while issuing death threats at her to stay away from Dark. In chapter 15, when the others find out, Moka threatens to tell Dark the Awful Truth that Arial is anything but his guardian angel unless she gives Mizore the ring back, which Arial dismisses right off the bat. | |
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In The Superman Adventures, Brainiac captures Lois and demands the globe containing Krypton's memories. Superman responds with his own demand — let Lois go or he smashes the ball. Superman won. | |
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Star Trek: Deep Space Nine: "Call to Arms" is an interesting example. Ben Sisko knows he's going to lose Deep Space 9; his plan is merely to Hold the Line until Jadzia and O'Brien can finish mining the Bajoran wormhole while inflicting as many casualties on the Dominion and Cardassians as he possibly can. | |
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Nintendo Wars: One mission in Advance Wars 2: Black Hole Rising has Sami and her troops surrounded by the Black Hole army, who demand she surrender. We don't hear her response, but judging by Eagle's men's... hesitance to say it out loud, and Eagle laughing his ass off when it's written down for him to read, it's implied it was extremely hilariously vulgar. | |
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In Kara of Rokyn, Superman's Phantom Zoners are ordered to return a stolen biological weapon and turn themselves in, or deadly force will be used. Zod retorts they can shove it. | |
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In A Bridge Too Far the German commander, hoping to prevent any further pointless bloodshed, sends an offer to discuss a surrender with the surrounded and hopelessly outnumbered British Paras. | |
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The third verse (and opening splash of the music video) of Sabaton's "Screaming Eagles" recounts how the commander of the 101st Airborne defending Bastogne at the Battle of the Bulge responded to a German surrender demand as follows: "NUTS!" | |
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Daughter for Dessert: After delivering his contract to buy up the diner for liquidation, Saul returns to follow up. He says that the protagonist needs to agree to the sale right now, or else his offer will be cut in half. The protagonist refuses outright. Justified, as the ultimatum came on the back of the wildly successful reopening of the diner. | |
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In A Force of Four, Mala assures the Infinitors that he'll kill them quickly and painlessly if they step aside while he kills Power Girl. Fury and Nuklon's retorts are predictable. | |
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On Sports Night, there's a rare inversion of it being done to the hero: in the Season 2 episode "Cliff Gardner", the network forces the staff to meet with them so they can give notes on how they think the show can be improved. Dana wants the network people to give her the notes, but they think she's just trying to keep those notes from the rest of the staff, and after a couple of go-rounds of this, Dana has had enough: Ultimately averted, however, in that, thanks to Sam Donovan, Dana gets to keep her job. |
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In Series 3 of The Last Kingdom, the Dane warlord Haesten surrounds Uhtred and his men with his entire army and offers the soldiers a chance to live if they hand over Uhtred. Uhtred's right hand man, Finan answers for all of them: | |
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In Duck Dodgers in the 24½th Century, Daffy Duck (as the title character) sends Marvin the Martian an ultimatum via some sort of bullet-like device which reads "surrender or be blown to 17,670,002 micro-cells". Marvin's reply (via a similar device) is a Trick Bullet that opens and fires a second bullet. | |
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Battle of the Bulge: At one point the German army approaches some surrounded American troops, and asks for their surrender. The American commander sends back a formally introduced but succinct answer: "Nuts." The German officers have no idea what that even means. (These events broadly happened in real life, as mentioned down below.) | |
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Lost: Season 3 "I Do" offers a non-heroic version. Ben is on the operating table, with Jack warning the Others not to pursue Kate and Sawyer or else he'll let Ben bleed out. Juliet immediately calls his bluff and orders the hunt. In another episode, a mercenary is holding Ben's adopted daughter hostage. He offers the simple "do as I say or she dies" ultimatum. Ben, never one to back down, decides to call the merc's bluff. Turns out he wasn't bluffing. |
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Superman: In The Superman Adventures, Brainiac captures Lois and demands the globe containing Krypton's memories. Superman responds with his own demand — let Lois go or he smashes the ball. Superman won. Let My People Grow! Brainiac warns he will level Metropolis if Superman does not turn the signal off. Superman replies he will just stop him. |
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Late in Season Four of Red vs. Blue, the Reds attempt to demand a surrender from Church while he's being backed up by a tank. Church simply orders Sheila, the tank, to shoot at them, leaving Donut to helplessly shout "Is that a no?" | |
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In Back to the Future Part III, Marty gets challenged to a duel by Buford Tannen, Biff's great-grandfather. He accepts, but eventually realizes from the photograph of Doc's tombstone that he will die from the duel. Trapped in the local saloon by Buford and his gang, he gets a count to ten to come outside and duel. The patrons also try to tell Marty to fight, but Marty eventually refuses. | |
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At the beginning of Gladiator, the Romans send an emissary to the Germanic tribesmen they're fighting to demand they surrender. The tribesmen send the emissary back minus his head. | |
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Jupiter does this to Balem in Jupiter Ascending. He can kill her and her family, but the alternative is just as bad and this way she's screwing him over in the process. | |
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One Piece: Luffy does this by accident. Boa Hancock offers him a Sadistic Choice: either save three Amazon women he's befriended but lose his only chance of escape, or get a ship to leave but leave the women to their fate. Hancock, being a woman who believes all men to be cruel without exception, assumes he'll choose the latter after some time, but Luffy immediately chooses to save the three women, and even bows to Hancock in thanks (in fact, Luffy doesn't even choose at all, he just immediately thanks Hancock for agreeing to spare the women). Hancock's shock is what ends up starting her Heel–Face Turn. | |
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Fire & Blood: Criston Cole, facing an enemy army with superior numbers, demands a trial by combat with the enemy commanders. He's instead told he can shove it and is promptly and fatally riddled with arrows. After killing his half-sister and rival for the throne, Aegon II imperiously demands Rhaenyra's supporters in the North, Vale, and Riverlands stand down and face punishment for supporting a usurper. Having already heard about the reprisals Aegon meted out on Rhaenyra's loyalists in the crownlands and realising their armies vastly outnumber the forces Aegon has left, they tell Aegon to shove his demands and march on King's Landing with the intention of deposing him and putting Rhaenyra's son on the Iron Throne. In his latest attempt to get his way over the Small Council of Aegon III, slimy bastard Unwin Peake says they can either do as he says or he'll resign on the spot. The unanimous response is "Don't let the door hit you on the way out." |
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In Futurama, the earth is taken over by a race of Scammers. When Leela leads a fleet to retake the planet, they're intercepted by the Scammer fleet. | |
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Matador Series: The Man Who Never Missed: Emile Khadaji names his (fakenote He's the only actual member.) resistance movement against the Confederation the "Shamba Freedom Forces" after Lord Thomas Reserve Shamba, a leader of a past anti-Confed uprising who responded to a surrender demand as follows: | |
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Mass Effect Nexus Uprising: At the end of the book, Acting Initiative Director Tann offers the rebels and rioters the offer of exile, believing they'll find the option of almost certain death in the unknowns of the Heleus Cluster so unappealing that they'll go for the option he wants, which is to go back into cryogenic stasis. Sloane Kelly tells him they'll go for exile rather than put up with any more of his bullshit. And punches him in the face for good measure. | |
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Crimson Spell: Vald manages to screw the ultimatum of The Dragon Gile before the offer is even out of Gile's mouth. Vald knows that since Gile is the most loyal servant of Big Bad evil sorcerer Astador, it can't possibly work out in his favor, so Vald just rejects it out of hand without even knowing what the ultimatium was. And considering Astador frames his plan to use the power of his curse to summon enough demons to remake the world as their playground as a way of eliminating illness and death, Vald has every reason to refuse. | |
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In The Princess Bride, when Westley and Buttercup come out from the Fire Swamp and are caught by Humperdinck and his men, Humperdinck yells "Surrender!" Westley's response: "You mean wish to surrender to me? Very well, I accept!" | |
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Bait and Switch (STO): Two in a row in "Frostbite". Breen captain Dalsh Ruul has taken Tess and most of her away team prisoner and tries to bargain with them as hostages after Eleya blows up the Breens' ship in orbit and demands their surrender. Ruul tries to issue a counter-ultimatum to stall for time so his men can set up transporter scramblers, but Eleya refuses to negotiate. "Didn't Expect That": The Albino, outmatching USS Bajor with a Scimitar-class dreadnought, hails them to tell Eleya to give up and let herself die quickly. Eleya cusses him out in Romulannote It's left untranslated but literally means "Go fuck yourself!" and hangs up. |
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In the Legion of Super-Heroes story The Great Darkness Saga: In the final issue, a servant of Darkseid intercepts the Legionnaires transporting Child Izaya and claims he will spare them if they surrender the child. Sun Boy blasts his face. Shortly after Darkseid has crushed the Legion except for Shadow Lass, who is standing between him and Child Izaya. Darkseid states he will spare her team, since the Legion mean nothing to him, if she stands aside. Shadow Lass retorts she has nothing to lose because he can only kill her once. |
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In the Left Behind book Armageddon, Carpathia issues the following to the defenders of Jerusalem: by the count of three, if there is silence for fifteen seconds, then that means that the defenders will surrender to the GC. The defenders' response: shooting their guns into the air, Tsion and Buck included. | |
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Doctor Who: In "Bad Wolf", Rose has been captured by the Daleks: | |
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Men in Black. The Bug has taken Laurel hostage and is threatening her. | |
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Secret Wars (2015): Doom enters the brawl between the Cabal and the last survivors of Earth-616 and tells them that he will spare their lives if they bow to him. Cyclops just attacks him, which doesn't accomplish much beyond getting him killed, but does allow Doctor Strange to teleport everyone else away. In the final issue, Doom finds T'Challa and Namor and says once again that if they surrender he'll use his omnipotent power to recreate their kingdoms. T'Challa flatly refuses to serve Victor's ego and uses the Infinity Gauntlet to turn him to ice, which Namor then smashes. Doom being in God Mode, this just serves to make him very angry, which was what T'Challa and Reed were hoping for. |
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On the Dream SMP, faced with Dream's demands of surrender, Wilbur defies Dream to his face, declaring he'd rather die than have L'Manburg rejoin Dream's half of the SMP server. Dream happily helps him and his allies with the "die" part, having planted TNT underneath L'Manburg and using the moment to detonate it and destroy a good 80% of the land. | |
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In South Park, the boys have hit on an idea of making money by stealing tooth fairy money from kids who have just lost teeth. They end up running into an organization that does the same, and after a brief period of cooperation, their partnership sours. The gang kidnaps Kenny and calls Cartman, telling him that they'll kill Kenny if he doesn't get out of the racket. Cartman being who he is, all he has to say is "I ain't givin' you crap! Kenny's not afraid of you!" before hanging up the phone. | |
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The Legend of Korra: Amon offers to let Lin keep her bending if she reveals Korra's location. She responds by all but spitting in his face. This happens again in Book 3, in an episode fittingly titled "The Ultimatum": |
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DARLING in the FRANXX: The Klaxosaur Princess in episode 17. A party of adults led by two of Papa's group tries to threaten her into surrendering. Her nonverbal refusal is a Brown Note to the negotiator. The other one attacks her, and she impales him with Combat Tentacles and slaughters the rest of them. | |
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Firefly: "Serenity": Dobson is on the receiving end of this twice. First, he gets Mal and Simon at gunpoint and orders them both to surrender (Simon is his target and he assumes Mal to be an accomplice), telling them they've got five minutes (referring to the Alliance cruiser he tried to hail before making his move). Then, at the climax, he gets a gun to River's head, tries to use her as a Human Shield, and gets out about half a sentence of demands before Mal storms into the cargo bay and shoots him in the face without even bothering to figure out what's going on. "War Stories": Zoe tries to buy back her captain and her husband, who are both held hostage. She then uses Wash's piloting skills to launch a surprise attack on Niska's base and rescue the captain. |
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In Fire Emblem: Awakening fic Golden Threads Tie Us, Grima finally storms the Ylisse's Castle and claims all Lucina's allies are dead, and he'll kill them too unless Lucina hands over the Fire Emblem and the fifth Gemstone to him. He demands the relics twice and Lucina refuses every time. | |
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Star Trek: Voyager: In the prologue of the pilot episode, Gul Evek hails Chakotay's ship Val Jean and gets as far as introducing himself before Chakotay hangs up on him in the middle of his surrender demand. We see a double example in the episode "Extreme Risk", the captain of a Malon freighter holds Voyager responsible for the destruction of another of their ships and announces that they're taking Voyager's new probe as compensation and demands that they immediately leave orbit of the gas giant in which it's currently trapped (presumably under threat of violence). Janeway, never one to take anyone's crap, reminds him that the other ship tried to steal their probe and was destroyed going into the gas giant after it, against Voyager's warnings. When he continues to press the matter, insisting that their people are salvage experts and Voyager has little chance of getting to the probe first in any event, Janeway just smirks and busts out this little gem: |
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Here There Be Monsters: On their rampage through North America, Shazam!'s villains Red Crusher and Mister Atom are intercepted by Canadian and American troops whose "Stop or we'll stop you" warnings are laughed off. | |
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Frasier: An odd example where no one's a villain, exactly. During one episode, Frasier's favorite coffee shop gets a terrible musician to whom Frasier (and only Frasier) objects. As he's making a scene, the manager comes out, and Frasier tries declaring that either the musician goes or he does. Frasier doesn't even get halfway through his demand before the manager sides with the musician. | |
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In the Babylon 5 episode "A Voice in the Wilderness, Part II" an alien ship appears and demands that Babylon 5 and the EarthForce cruiser EAS Hyperion grant them access to the Great Machine on the planet Epsilon III within ten hours or be destroyed. The captain of the Hyperion shoots back that they have no authority here, and tells them to GTFO within nine hours or they will be destroyed. | |
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In the "Into the Blue" arc of Full Metal Panic!, Kurz Weber answers Guen Bien Bo's 'join us in our mutiny or die' ultimatum by explaining that he has a much better plan: "I'll kill you, ask Tessa for a picture of herself in a swimsuit as a reward, then make copies of the picture and sell them to the other guys on the ship for twenty bucks apiece!" Then he brains Bo with a fire extinguisher. | |
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Star Trek: The Next Generation: In the episode "The Defector", Picard's Enterprise is staring down two Romulan Warbirds after investigating a supposedly secret Romulan base in the Neutral Zone. When the Romulans demand the Enterprise surrender her crew and the titular defector, Picard tells them he's not considering it for a moment. Picard has good reason to be this confident; he has three cloaked Klingon Birds of Prey surrounding the Romulans. In the episode "Reunion", as Worf fights Duras to avenge the murder of K'Ehleyr, Duras tells him that if he gets killed, Worf will never get his family honor back after having lost it in "Sins of the Father", since Duras is the only other Klingon who knows the truth about the cover-up. Worf responds "Then that is the way it shall be!", before driving his Bat'leth into Duras' chest. And he gets his family honour back anyway, in part because killing Duras left his major political rival Gowron owing Worf a very large favour. |
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