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Tell Him I'm Not Speaking to Him
- 270 statements
- 52 feature instances
- 43 referencing feature instances
| Tell Him I'm Not Speaking to Him | type |
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| Tell Him I'm Not Speaking to Him | label |
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| Tell Him I'm Not Speaking to Him | page |
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| Tell Him I'm Not Speaking to Him | comment |
Alice has fallen out with Bob and is giving him the Silent Treatment, refusing to speak to him. However, she also has a loophole to get around her own self-imposed restriction: ask Carol to relay messages to Bob on her behalf. That way, she is not technically breaking her silence. Often this is used passive-aggressively to take shots at Bob while still maintaining her silence. It's common for this to go both ways too; both Alice and Bob aren't speaking to each other and are using Carol as a go-between. Carol is typically a neutral third-party who has no interest in the quarrel and just wants Alice and Bob to be friends. If she does go along with relaying their messages, it usually won't take long before she gets frustrated and gives up, or forces Alice and Bob to make amends herself. A common joke is for Alice and Bob to be in the same room and able to hear each other perfectly well, but still refusing to acknowledge each other unless Carol relays the message. Usually Played for Laughs, as the behavior is quite farcical and unbecoming of an adult. See also Proxy Breakup. |
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| Tell Him I'm Not Speaking to Him / int_162fcaab | type |
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In "Date Night" from Dinosaur Train, Don refuses to speak with the babysitter Keira, using Buddy as his messenger, until he finally warms up to her. | |
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In The Baby-Sitters Club book Mary Anne Saves the Day, all the girls in the club are fighting, but Mary Anne and Kristy still end up sitting for the Pike kids together. Mary Anne is forced to talk to Kristy through the kids, because even while they're on the job, Kristy refuses to acknowledge anything Mary Anne says. Mary Anne manages to salvage the Club's reputation somewhat by pretending that she and Kristy are playing a game of telephone. | |
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In The Simpsons, Homer and Lisa talk via Marge/Bart when Lisa ruined Homer's barbecue in "Lisa the Vegetarian". Homer soon gets confused about who he is and isn't talking to. | |
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Drunk History: The Hamilton episode has Lin-Manuel Miranda framing the feud between Hamilton and Monroe in this manner, with Aaron Burr serving as the intermediary. | |
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Spacetrawler has a variant where it's less about refusing to speak, and more about recruiting the third party to bolster their argument, and the third party is an Extreme Doormat. | |
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In Grand Theft Auto V, after finding out the truth about Brad, Trevor is angry at Michael and, on a mission with Franklin to rescue Lamar, sends an insult his way. Michael in turn tells Franklin "Tell Trevor I said 'Bite me'". | |
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In One Hundred Years of Solitude, Amaranta and Fernanda spend years not talking after Amaranta verbally humiliates Fernanda in front of the family due to her pompous attitude. Not even Amaranta's death changes their minds; when Ursula asks the dying Amaranta to say goodbye, she bitterly says "it's not worth it anymore". | |
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A surprisingly grim example comes from The Wolfhound series in form of a quirk of the Venn (Fantasy Counterpart to the Slavic tribes) culture — they believe that a shared conversation binds just as strongly as a shared meal. If a male Venn (including the titular hero) is giving you this trope, or the Silent Treatment, it means he's seriously considering killing you. | |
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Avengers Assemble: Being around his adoptive brother brings out King T'Challa's childish side, as when he's forced to go to Wakanda's jails and ask for Hunter's expertise, he brings Shuri and makes her tell him what T'Challa want. Shuri utterly refuses. | |
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In Xiaolin Showdown, Clay and Kimiko do this through Omi once. Since they were right next to each other at the time, they directly respond to one another while keeping up the Tell Him I'm Not Speaking To Him charade, leaving naive Omi to politely try to send the message at each interval. It ends with Raimundo telling Omi to tell them both that they're giving him a headache. | |
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In one episode of Scrubs, Dr. Cox gets annoyed with Elliott for deliberately setting him up to say the wrong thing to a German patient, so when she asks him for help, he talks to a stapler. For much of Season Six, once she becomes "Private Practice Barbie", Dr. Kelso refuses to acknowledge her existence, and talks to her through the nurses. | |
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Calvin and Hobbes: Calvin's mother drifts into this following a Horrible Camping Trip. | |
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In one episode of King of the Hill, Bill and Dale act like this after an argument they had over a empty beer can Dale left on Bill's lawn. | |
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Whites: Caroline refuses to speak to Roland at the end of Episode 4, so he has to make conversation with Robin. | |
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The Big Bang Theory had an interesting variant where Howard was not only not talking to Leonard but also insisting that Leonard had passed on ("dead to me"). Sheldon was willing to participate until Howard acknowledged his presence and thereby violated the terms of his own premise. | |
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In Adventures in Wonderland, the Mad Hatter and March Hare do this in their Feud Episode, "Party-Pooped," when they find themselves at the same party. But their friends turn the tables on them: they all start talking like this, with no one speaking directly to anyone else. This confuses the Hatter and Hare so much that they speak to each other without thinking, which leads them to finally make up. | |
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Crabgrass: This comic, when Miles and Kevin are no longer on speaking terms due to Kevin's Precocious Crush on Miles' mom, they try to use Kevin's sister Krystal as a go between. She is not interested however, and so the boys try it with Kevin's baby brother Kody. | |
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A variation occurs in Cro. Earl and Mojo get into an argument and decide to not speak to one another. Problem is, they want to keep insulting the other, so they get the Neanderthals to deliver the messages for them. Hilarity Ensues when their messages get mixed up with Cro's, who's trying to tell the other mammoths that Phil's trapped inside a volcano about to erupt. | |
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PB&J Otter: Jelly and Pinch put Peanut in the middle of their fight in "The Silent Treatment," to the point where he collapses on the ground from tiredness of running back and forth between them. | |
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In the final episode of Tetangga Masa Gitu, Adi and Bastian are in a feud and they pass message through the RW leader when they have to work together in a cooking contest. | |
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In Alien Abduction Role Play, Tori refuses to talk directly to Acktreal, preferring instead to do so through the unnamed human protagonist. | |
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New Tricks: In "Ghosts", a spat between Gerry and Steve over a missing sausage roll escalates to the point where Gerry is refusing to acknowledge Steve's existence, and starts forwarding all of his comments to him through Sasha and Danny. Sasha and Danny are only too quick to point out how silly the whole thing is. | |
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In an early Something*Positive strip, PeeJee and Aubrey try to talk through Davan, who refuses to co-operate, setting Choo-Choo on them. (They then "try" to talk through Choo-Choo about how they should attack Davan). | |
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Jackie Chan Adventures: Tohru and Uncle get into an arguement in the episode "The Demon Behind" and vow to stop speaking to each other. They use Jackie and Jade as messengers, much to Jackie's annoyance. | |
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True Stories: Earl and Kay Culver are a husband and wife who, for reasons never explained, never communicate directly to one another, instead doing so through the people around them (e.g. Kay asking her kid at dinner to ask Earl to pass the salt). | |
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Arthur In "Mom and Dad Have a Great Big Fight", D.W. pictures this happening in an Imagine Spot if her Mom and Dad never stop fighting. Played with in "So Funny I Forgot to Laugh", when Arthur's friends stop speaking to him because of his repeated teasing of Sue Ellen. |
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Granny Weatherwax and Magrat put Nanny in the middle in Witches Abroad. Made funnier by the fact both feuding characters tend to get arch when they're annoyed, and Nanny doesn't bother. | |
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An episode of Hogan's Heroes (if memory serves, the final episode) had an example of this that followed the trope description at the top of the page. | |
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War and Peas: In "Order", a private is ordered to take a message to Sgt. Jefferson...who is standing right next to them. | |
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Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire: Happened between Harry and Ron, with Hermione in the middle. | |
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Shaggy and Scooby didn't speak to each other throughout an episode of A Pup Named Scooby-Doo, trying to use Daphne as an intermediary. However, she was too annoyed with both of them to actually do it - plus, both of them heard what the other was saying. | |
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On Beat Bugs, Walter and Jay put Buzz through this in "I Call Your Name." It doesn't last long because Crick and Kumi observe what is happening and devise a plan to try to get them back together. | |
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In an episode of Shtisel, Shulem is resentful of his visiting brother Nuchem, and tells his son Akiva to tell Nuchem to go see their mother (Akiva's grandmother) in the old folks' home. Nuchem is in the next room and can hear Shulem telling Akiva this, but Akiva decides to play along and tells Nuchem's daughter (who also heard everything) to tell her father what Shulem just told him. She cracks up halfway through telling her father at the sheer ridiculousness of it all. | |
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In Magyk, the first book of the Septimus Heap series, the message rat Stanley is initially relieved when asked to do a job for wizards, as his previous job had consisted of conveying messages between two arguing sisters that had eventually descended into this. Things were so far gone that he was essentially running back and forth and saying nothing, until finally the sisters' mother was shocked by the huge bill and canceled the service. | |
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In The Men from the Ministry One and Two have a fiery argument over the quality of latter's recent play for the Ministry's amateur theater, and afterwards refuse to talk to each other and try to use Mildred as a relay. She, however, isn't having any of it and quickly forces them to make an agreement. | |
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In Fate/Zero, Kiritsugu keeps his distance from Saber due to their strong mutual dislike, and apart from when he uses Command Seals on her, he primarily communicates to her by speaking to Irisviel, his wife and Saber's decoy master. Because of this, in Fate/stay night, Saber recalls only three occasions on which Kiritsugu spoke to her- the uses of said Command Seals. | |
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In the film version of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Hermione gets so fed up with this in relation to the arguing of Harry and Ron that she finally shouts in exasperation "I'm not an owl!", referential of the post owls in the series. | |
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In Darths & Droids, Princess attempts this. The person she refuses to speak with is right there, and her intermediary won't cooperate. It's eventually revealed that said intermediary, who seems to be acting difficult, is actually stuck saying the opposite of everything she means to. | |
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In episode 43 of Mimpi Metropolitan, Bambang and Melani have a spat because of Bambang's jealousy. When Melani wants to help setting up some party decoration, Bambang wants Alan to tell Melani that he doesn't want her help. Alan doesn't get why Bambang can't just tell her himself and tells Bambang to stop after passing three messages. When Bambang tries again, this time mocking Melani via Pipin, Melani has enough of it. | |
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In Judy Moody: Around the World in 8 1/2 Days, nearly an entire chapter is just Judy's little brother, Stink, doing this for Judy and Frank when Frank is upset with Judy and won't speak to her because she missed a dance practice for a school project because she was spending time with a new friend named Amy Namey. | |
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In Dr. Katz, Professional Therapist, in "Big TV", Dr. Katz refuses to talk to Ben when Ben bought a big screen TV without his permission. The trope is initially played straight (with Laura being the party relaying the messages), but is subverted in short order when both parties forget who they're not talking to. | |
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In the The Book of Pooh episode, "A Wood Divided", Rabbit and Tigger get into a feud when they bump into each other at the footbridge, ruining the former's prized tomato and the latter's tail-bouncing record. Rabbit eventually paints a line in the middle of the Hundred Acre Wood, with one side for him, and the other for Tigger. At one point, they sit on opposite sides of the line during a picnic, with poor Piglet serving as their mouthpiece. | |
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My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic: Parodied in "Surf and/or Turf"; when the Cutie Mark Crusaders get called to help a young hippogriff who can't decide whether he wants to live on Mount Aris with his father or in Seaquestria with his mother. Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo nearly ruin the mission when they can't agree either, and they end up sulking on the beach, forcing Apple Bloom to relay messages to each other. Then a Reveal Shot shows Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo are sitting about a foot from each other, back-to-back. | |
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Used in Boys Before Flowers, but it takes very little time for Jan Di to get fed up with Jun Pyo and start yelling at him directly. | |
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The Fledgling Year: Cor and Aravis often engage in variations of not-talking-to-each-other during their many fights. Cor and Corin do it using Aravis as the middleman at least once, which Aravis promptly lampshades. |
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The Ultimates: In the plane, just before the attack on the Chitauri / Nazi base, a Private Kowalski is completely skeptical of the help that Captain America may provide, and dismisses him as a mere clown who will die down there alongside everyone else. Rather than reply to him, Cap tells Bucky to tell them all that he's never lost a crew. | |
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Love in the Villa: Early in the film, Charlie and Julie both tell Silvio to tell the other person about their booking...even though Silvio is standing between the two of them. | |
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On an episode of Family Guy, this happens when Peter and Chris fight over the Evil Monkey spending time with Chris, which Peter almost rarely does. | |
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In Doug, the breakup of The Beatles homage band The Beets plays out like this, with all four members of the group holding a press conference where they face away from the microphone and say things like this ("I'm not telling them, YOU tell them!") before one finally has enough and very curtly says that they're splitting up. | |
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Towards the beginning of Ptomely's Gate from The Bartimaeus Trilogy, Nathaniel and Bartimaeus go through a variation of this, with Nathaniel's secretary, Ms. Piper, as the unfortunate intermediary. It finally ends thus: | |
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Happens in The House of the Spirits, after Clara and Esteban's disastrous fight over Blanca and her boyfriend Pedro Tercero that would end in tragedy. From then on Clara never told him a word anymore, though later she softens up a little and writes messages to him instead. | |
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In Ice Age: The Meltdown, Ellie doesn't talk to Manny, with Crash and Eddie in the middle, but the middle guys end up rewording the messages she says into their wording, trying to make him leave her alone. For Manny's credit, he can hear her as they walk. For example: | |
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