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Why Are You Not My Son?
- 386 statements
- 73 feature instances
- 38 referencing feature instances
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A type of being The Un-Favourite in which a character's parent compares them negatively to one of their friends or acquaintances. It is very common for this to sow antagonism between the two people compared. The extent to which the parent shows this attitude tends to vary, ranging from an unconscious preference for the friend to an openly antagonistic attitude towards their own child. In these situations, the parent will usually employ some variation of Why Couldn't You Be Different? against their child at some point, telling them that they should try to be more like the person they are being negatively compared to. Contrast Like a Son to Me, which generally has much more positive connotations. Compare "Well Done, Son" Guy. |
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Done lightly on Pretty Little Liars: When Emily stays with Hanna while her parents move to Texas, she cooks breakfast the first morning as a "thank you," and Hanna's mom jokes about considering keeping the "daughter upgrade." | |
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Yet another Spider-Man example: Norman thinks this of Peter in Ultimate Spider-Man (2012), though it's somewhat mitigated by the fact that this version Norman does care about his own son, Harry. Becomes blatant in the episode "Carnage" though, where he hails Peter as the son he always wanted and dismisses his and Harry's relation as just "[sharing] a few recessive genes". | |
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In Kings, the ruling King Silas prefers David to his son Jack because Jack's homosexuality and generally hedonistic lifestyle prevents him from being capable of taking over the kingdom. The plot being lifted from the story of Saul, Jonathan, and David from The Bible makes this Older Than Feudalism. | |
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In the first series of Skins, Sid's episode shows that his father clearly prefers Tony over him, not getting that Sid is trying to be a hero helping people while Tony is a boderline sociopath. | |
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Jonny Quest: The Real Adventures: Played for Laughs in an early episode where the team is exploring the polar regions. Jonny is eager to go out and test the new equipment, including upgraded (and fast) snowmobiles. Jessie segues into reminding him about the scientific purpose and importance of their mission. Race raises an eyebrow, turns to Dr. Quest and asks if they somehow managed to swap kids. It is Played for Drama in a later episode when Jonny is trapped in a Lotus-Eater Machine by Surd. In it he encounters a fake version of his father who calls him a disappointment for not being a scientist like him and openly favors Jessie for her scientific acumen. Jonny thinks this really is his father and he collapses to his knees trying to shut out the words. Since Surd was using Jonny's own fears to create the simulation, it's strongly implied that part of Jonny really thinks that his father wishes he was more like Jessie. Fortunately, the real Doctor Quest (having broken out of his own fear-based simulation) shows up and punches out the fake for mocking his son. |
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A variant in The Rise of Kyoshi. Kyoshi's parents abandoned her at a young age. When she tracks down their old bandit crew she meets Lek, an orphan whom they took in sometime afterwards. Kyoshi is understandably annoyed that her parents cared about some random other kid more than her. For his part, Lek can't stand Kyoshi disrespecting them, with an underlying layer of Denying the Dead Parent's Sins. | |
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Heroes: In series one, Sylar seemed to be under the impression that Chandra initially preferred him to Mohinder. At least, that's what Sylar tells Mohinder. | |
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Grand Theft Auto V: Michael introduces Franklin to Trevor as "the son [he] always wanted", and treats him like this too. Considering that his two (adult) children, Jimmy and Tracey, are brats he's disappointed in, it's not hard to see why Michael prefers to hang out with Franklin rather than with Jimmy, especially since Jimmy causes Michael a lot of unnecessary trouble. | |
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Community: It's no secret that Pierce is constantly frowned-upon by his racist and homophobic father in all endeavors that go against him, but this becomes even more clear when Pierce watches a commercial starring his father and a young Pierce... except the boy in the commercial isn't Pierce - it's a child actor. This becomes this trope when Cornelius shoos Pierce off the set where the commercial is being held while, at the same time, praising the actor who was playing as his son. | |
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The movie "O" is Othello set at a high school, and has the Iago character as the son of a coach and the Othello equivalent being his favorite player. Unlike the original play, this makes "Iago", if not sympathetic, at least relatable rather than acting For the Evulz. | |
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To an extent, Ron encounters this in Harry Potter. He already feels like The Un-Favourite compared to his six siblings, but there are also some moments where his parents dote on Harry and he feels slighted. From a more objective perspective, however, one could easily see that his parents care about him too—they just feel more sorry for Harry because he has no loving family of his own. This even comes up in Riddle Locket's Breaking Speech: the locket conjures up an illusion of Harry who claims (among other things) that Mrs. Weasley confessed to loving him more, while mockingly asking Ron why she wouldn't. Ron gets off easy compared to Neville. In addition to the pressure of living up to his Auror parents, his grandmother likes to ask him why he couldn't be more like Harry (and she only speaks to him once in the series). At the start of book six, Professor McGonagall tells Neville that it's time his grandmother started appreciating the grandson she had instead of the one she thought she ought to have. His grandmother eventually does say how proud of him she is. |
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Neon Genesis Evangelion gives some strong subtext with this. Gendo abandoned Shinji years ago, and continues to treat him coldly even when he summons him to become an Eva pilot. Meanwhile, Shinji is jealous of how close Gendo is to Rei, his fellow pilot and the only person whom Gendo seems to care about. It gets a lot more complicated because Shinji and Rei share some kind of attraction, Gendo and Rei's feelings could also be read as more romantic than familial, and oh yeah, Rei is a clone of Shinji's dead mom. | |
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In an episode of King of the Hill, Dale starts teaching Bobby acting and Hank starts teaching Dale's son lacrosse in a variant of this trope. | |
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In the Discworld of A.A. Pessimal, there are two girls who are only daughters. They are cousins; their respective fathers are brothers, estranged Grand Dukes of a noble family in Far Ãœberwald. Olga Romanoff is estranged from her family as she caught the peasant affliction of Witchcraft at a young age and ran away to Lancre to learn how to use it safely. In later life, she joined the City Watch in Ankh-Morpork where she now holds officer rank. There is still distance between Olga and her father, but two of her uncles, Casimir and Dimitri, both admire her. Meanwhile, Dimitri's daughter Natasha Romanoff was sent to the Assassins' Guild School, as a socially acceptable and prestigious education for a young woman of quality and nobility. Her Uncle Nikolas (Olga's father) has openly said he wishes Natasha had been his daughter, as she would have spared him the trials and disappointments he got with Olga. Meanwhile both Uncle Casimir and Uncle Dimitri (Natasha's father) have openly admired Olga for her abilities and skills, and what she has made of herself. Dimitri has compared her - favourably - to his own daughter Natasha. And both cousins are very aware of this. Over a bottle of something strong they have joked that maybe they should swap fathers. | |
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Marckus from Hunter: The Parenting says he's pretty sure his father Big D likes his fiancé Kitten more than him. Marckus says it evens out since he also prefers Kitten. | |
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Infinity Train: Blossoming Trail: Part of the reason why Chloe resents Ace and Goh so much is because she suspects her father feels this way towards both boys. After all, both share his interest in Pokémon, unlike her, and Ash had already traveled far and wide before getting involved with Professor Cerise's research. This leads to him unintentionally ignoring his daughter in favor of the pair, only paying attention to her when Pokémon are involve. Eventually, it's made clear that the Professor does not feel this way, and was legitimately unaware of how Chloe felt. | |
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Subverted in The Godfather Part II when Michael Corleone comments that Hyman Roth acts like Michael is his son, but "he thinks he's going to live forever" and is actually plotting against Michael. Roth does use this trope in regard to Moe Greene, whose death Michael arranged in the first film, so it's implied that revenge is partly his motive. | |
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In Cowboys & Aliens, Colonel Dollarhyde tells Nat, his son's Indian friend, that he wishes he had a son like him. | |
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Norman Osborn in the first Spider-Man film is a more unintentional example, clearly impressed by Peter's brilliance and implicitly comparing his own son, Harry, negatively to Peter. As everyone knows, Norman becomes the villain the Green Goblin, and Harry ends up going crazy and following in his father's footsteps. In their battles at Spider-Man 3, Peter — corrupted by the Venom symbiote — uses this trope at Harry to mock him, telling him that his father was ashamed of him as his son. However in Spider-Man: No Way Home it's shown that Norman genuinely did love Harry, as his Alternate Timeline counterpart breaks into tears over not being able to find him after ending up in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. | |
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American Dad!: In one episode, after Steve complains about Stan forcing him to get involved with his interests. As a result, Stan takes an interest in Steve's friend Barry. It goes From Bad to Worse when Barry stops taking his anti-psychotic medication and decides to eliminate Steve from the picture. In another episode, Steve comes home from school with a story about being horribly bullied. Stan is angry at Steve for letting himself be bullied and angry at the bully "for not being my son." |
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In Ramen Fighter Miki, Makiko says this about hard working Kankuro (Makiko's daughter is The Slacker Adult Child Miki). | |
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In Smallville, this is part of the subtext of the slow disintegration of Clark and Lex's friendship. Lex's father Lionel seems constantly disappointed with his son, while at the same time respecting Clark immensely, to the point of actually calling him "son" to his face. Clark, for his, part despises Lionel for a number of reasons, most notably because of Lionel's continued abuse of Lex. Also inverted with Lex, who for several years wants Clark's father Jonathan to be his father instead of Lionel. | |
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In A Love Letter For The Marching Puppy, Fujino Kagami's mother is rather cold to her own daughter, but dotes on Shinobu Iindou, the orphaned daughter of her old friend, and Iindou considers Fujino's mother to be an Honorary Aunt. | |
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In the third season of Damages Joe, the son of Louis Tobin, the late runner of a Ponzi scheme, confronts the family attorney, Leonard on how Leonard isn't even a real lawyer but stole his identity. Leonard scoffs that Louis knew the truth about him for years, that he trusted Leonard totally and openly says "I was more his son than you ever were." Joe laughs that Louis openly called Leonard "my little monkey" and never saw him as more than just another employee to use. | |
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A variation on Star Trek: Deep Space Nine—while Nog's father Rom is fully supportive of his son's desire to be the first Ferengi to join Starfleet, Uncle Quark isn't. Meanwhile, Jake Sisko, whose father is a Starfleet legend, is a writer with no desire to follow in his dad's footsteps. | |
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Arthur: In "The Perfect Brother", Brain stays over at Arthur's house for the weekend, and Arthur's family constantly compliments him on his polite and helpful behavior, such as eating his food neatly, offering Arthur's dad a cooking tip, and helping Arthur's mom with her accounting. This leads Arthur to become slightly jealous of and resentful towards Brain... until he decides to come over to Brain's house and notices that Brain's room is actually as messy as his own room. Brain's parents even start complimenting Arthur on his good behavior. | |
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On Seinfeld, George's Sitcom Arch-Nemesis is Lloyd Braun, who grew up in the same neighbourhood as George. George's mother always liked Lloyd better than him, even more so now that the two are adults and Lloyd is much more successful than George. Lloyd however seems completely unaware that George dislikes him. | |
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In The Boy Who Drew Monsters, both Jack's parents see Nick more as the normal son, which they could have had and favor him in many circumstances, not that this even bothers Jack in any way (too involved with his drawings), Tim (the father) especially envisions Nell (Nick's mother) as the wife he could have had and Nick as the son he could have had, in the life he could have had (at the hospital Tim even blurts to Nell, in front of his own son, that Nick is like a son to him, Nell then points towards Jack (his actual son) telling him that he is his son not Nick, but Jack is not even aware of the entire dialogue); Holly, in contrast, envisions her life at one point without any son, or any husband for that matter. Downplayed to an extent though, and strangely zigzagged at times, because even though both parents essentially blame Jack for ruining their lives with the troubles he has caused them and their marriage, due to his suddenly new abnormal behavior, it is quite clear that they both still care for and love their son, and acknowledge him as such. They even refer to him numerous times as their son, their 'baby boy', the boy that they want back. | |
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In Batman: Heart of Hush, Tommy Elliot's mother constantly praises Bruce Wayne as an intelligent, successful man of the world while keeping her own son under her thumb and getting in the way of his own dreams of success. Tommy grows increasingly frustrated by this, especially since he thinks of Bruce as a spoiled playboy. | |
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Originally, this wasn't there so much. Norman was an avuncular figure to Peter in his amnesiac lame dad phase. After his resurrection, in Revenge of the Green Goblin, Norman decides that Peter is his true heir and resolves to torture him until he becomes a Goblin. | |
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Saints Row 2: Ronin boss Kazuo Akuji very obviously favors Jyunichi, who's more traditional, over his Americanized son Shogo, which prompts Shogo to betray Jyunichi to the Saints. Even then, Kazuo is just as grieved by Shogo being left as his only heir as he is by Jyunichi's death. | |
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Arulaine makes no secret of his preference for Malachi in Eludoran, much to his own daughter's jealousy. | |
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In Green Lantern (2011), Hector Hammond's father prefers Hal Jordan, a "doer", over Hector, a "thinker". | |
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Robin seems to feel this way in "Downtime" when Batman takes Aqualad aside for a private talk, even though it's not really the case (Bat's actually chewing out Aqualad). Bruce later mends things with a pick-up basketball game. | |
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They aren't necessarily friends, but in Shakespeare's Henry IV Part 1, the titular king openly compares his son Harry to rebel leader Hotspur and considers the latter far superior. | |
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In Sally Forth (Howard), while Sally and Ted love Hilary dearly, the storyline where Faye is living with them is developing shades of this. In one strip where Hil and Faye have an argument, Sally and Ted both want to talk to Faye because it's much easier than talking to Hil. In another, when Faye says she's picked up Hil's clothes and put on a load of laundry, Ted's reaction is "Wow, 'New Hil' is working out great." (Sally responds with a resigned "Please stop calling her that.") | |
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A subversion on Glee: Burt Hummel is quite accepting of his Camp Gay son Kurt, even though he's a Manly Man himself. But when quarterback Finn becomes his stepson, Burt and Finn start bonding over their similar interests, making Kurt feel jealous of the bond he will never have with his father. Burt assures Kurt that though he may not always understand him, he always loves him. | |
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Reed Richards' father in Ultimate Fantastic Four blatantly prefers the more athletic Ben Grimm to his own genius son. | |
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In an episode of Goof Troop, Pete and his son PJ's best friend Max end up paired up on an RV project. Pete compliments Max for his insight and wonders aloud why PJ can't be more like Max. Pete probably didn't know PJ was listening in on that conversation, but later in the episode he blatantly rejects PJ in favor of Max multiple times. Generally speaking, however, Pete doesn't favor Max over PJ—he usually treats both of them with hostility. | |
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Recess, "More Like Gretchen": Gretchen and Spinelli spend the day with Spinelli's parents, who can't stop gushing about Gretchen, who plays the piano and sings very well, can fix a TV, and even improves upon Spinelli's spaghetti recipe. As a result, Spinelli starts to become jealous and very antagonistic towads Gretchen, claiming she doesn't want to be her friend anymore. | |
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The Spectacular Spider-Man also uses the "Norman Osborn/Green Goblin preferring Peter Parker to his son Harry" plot. This version of Norman is by far the most blatant, contrasting the two of them right to Harry's face. | |
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Gladiator: Marcus Aurelius calls Maximus "the son I should have had" and tries to have Maximus assume power instead of his own son Commodus. Commodus doesn't take this well. | |
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Helluva Boss: Blitzo's father Cash preferred Fizzarolli to him because Fizz was a more popular performer. One flashback to Fizz's birthday party shows Cash handing Fizz a birthday card that reads: "I wish you were my son". | |
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The Sicilian: Mafia Don Croce Malo feels this towards the protagonist and wishes for him to be his successor, as his real son went off to South America to become a missionary, much to his disappointment. | |
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Norman Osborn/Green Goblin prefers Peter Parker/Spider-Man to his son Harry in Ultimate Spider-Man. This has bled back into the main universe on at least some level - even before Harry came Back from the Dead, there was a mini-series devoted to Norman trying to brainwash Peter into becoming his "heir". This also shows up in Spider-Man: Life Story. | |
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In Ultimate X Men, during a brief period where Cyclops defects to the Brotherhood, Magneto asks him to call him "father" and encourages him to pursue a relationship with the Scarlet Witch, right in front of his actual son Quicksilver. However, it's not clear if this is due to genuine respect for Cyclops or just an extension of the constant emotional abuse Magneto subjects Quicksilver to. | |
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Magic: The Gathering: Vuel is Sidar Kondo's real son, Gerrard his adopted son. When Gerrard inadvertently makes Vuel fail his Rite of Passage, Kondo rejects him, and he eventually turns into Volrath, Gerrard's eventual mortal enemy. | |
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Heavily implied to be the case in Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords. It's partially confirmed that Kreia/Darth Traya's true identity is the Jedi Knight Arren Kae, Brianna's mother. Despite Kreia knowing full well who she is, she sees her own daughter as a pawn in her games, to be used and sacrificed without a second thought for the sake of The Exile. However, when she confronts the male Exile about his possible interest in Brianna and Visas Marr, the way she speaks is almost as if she would rather have the Exile choosing the former which makes an odd amount of sense. | |
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Completely averted in Kaamelott; where Leodagan already finds his own son Yvain a complete disappointment (imagine the kind of lazy and selfish teenager incapable of grasping his lack of talent and has no plans for the future), and sees Yvain's best friend Gauvain as equally annoying (now imagine two of them). | |
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Tripp on Dirty Sexy Money certainly seems to prefer Nick over all of his own children. | |
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This often underlines Spider-Man's dynamic with Norman Osborn, AKA the Green Goblin, and his son Harry Osborn who is Peter's best friend: Originally, this wasn't there so much. Norman was an avuncular figure to Peter in his amnesiac lame dad phase. After his resurrection, in Revenge of the Green Goblin, Norman decides that Peter is his true heir and resolves to torture him until he becomes a Goblin. Norman Osborn/Green Goblin prefers Peter Parker/Spider-Man to his son Harry in Ultimate Spider-Man. This has bled back into the main universe on at least some level - even before Harry came Back from the Dead, there was a mini-series devoted to Norman trying to brainwash Peter into becoming his "heir". This also shows up in Spider-Man: Life Story. |
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Young Justice (2010): Icicle Sr. praises Tommy Terror (actually Superboy in disguise) and compares him favorably to his son, Tommy/Superboy's cellmate Icicle Jr. Robin seems to feel this way in "Downtime" when Batman takes Aqualad aside for a private talk, even though it's not really the case (Bat's actually chewing out Aqualad). Bruce later mends things with a pick-up basketball game. |
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In one episode of The Thundermans, Dr. Colosso tells his young "apprentice" Max: "You're the evil son I've never had!", to which his own son angrily replies: "Stop loving him! I'm the evil son you've never had!" | |
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Earth's Children: At the end of The Clan of the Cave Bear, Brun publicly shames his son Broud and simultaneously shows his belated appreciation of Ayla by unfavorably comparing them and wishing that Ayla had been his son and heir instead, as she always displayed far more dignity, humility, self-control, compassion and respect for her elders than Broud ever has. | |
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Blodeuwedd from Dead In Vinland tells the very helpful Angelico she'd love to have a daughter like him — then does a Verbal Backspace when she realizes she's implied he's unmanly. (He isn't offended.) | |
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One SpongeBob SquarePants episode has SpongeBob trying to act very mature, and his grandmother pampering Patrick instead. SpongeBob ends up breaking into tears and admitting he likes being babied. | |
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Downplayed in the Doctor Who episode "Dinosaurs on a Spaceship"; Rory's dad Brian is not nearly as bad to him as some of the parents on this list, but he still clearly looks down on him a bit. Rory's wife Amy, on the other hand: | |
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Hwang in the Soul Series. Seong Han-myeong basically treats him like the son he never had, and whilst he loves his daughter Seong Mi-na, will not allow her to go out to fight because it wasn't considered proper for a woman to do so in Korea at the time. | |
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In My Bride is a Mermaid, Nagasumi's parents consider him a loser, and declare Sun, Lunar, and Maki to be the daughters they wish they had. | |
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Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex. In "Solid State Society", Aramaki goes to visit a mentor in hospital. It's not a dignified sight — his mentor is dying alone and in pain, rambling incoherently, with only his Sex Bots to tend him. When Aramaki goes to leave however, the mentor appears to mistake Aramaki for his son and says, "I'm glad an old fool like me sired a genius like you." | |
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On one episode of The Replacements, Riley goes to Canada on an exchange program and the boy from Canada who arrives to live with the Darlings ends up being so well liked that the family neglects Todd. | |
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Dragon Ball Multiverse: U18 Vegeta appears to have this briefly when he sees how strong U16 Bra is, and gets annoyed with his own daughter when she rejects his suggestion for her to train to get as strong as her counterpart. | |
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In Season 1 of Gossip Girl, Eleanor is more friendly to and seems to favor Serena over her daughter, Blair. | |
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Kick-Ass. Frank D'Amico can't help being impressed by Hit Girl, and gives this trope as he's about to put a bullet in her head. | |
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Heihachi Mishima of Tekken has this opinion of Paul Phoenix and hates his real son Kazuya, though that might have something to do with Kazuya constantly trying to kill him... because Heihachi first tried to kill him. Heihachi also went out and adopted Lee Chaolan, specifically to have someone to compare Kazuya to. But while that part worked, he still didn't actually care for his trueborn son (Kazuya), his adopted son (Lee), his illegitimate son (Lars), or his grandson (Jin). Or his father. Really, the best way to get Heihachi to not like you is to have an actual father-son relationship with him. | |
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Buffy the Vampire Slayer: This is the sort of subtext that Buffy feels when Kendra, the other Slayer, shows up. She and Giles hit it off easily, as she's been training her whole life for the role and is closer to what a Slayer is "supposed" to be, and actually studied the lore books including The Slayer Handbook (which Giles didn't even bother telling Buffy about because he thought it would be of no help). | |
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Why Are You Not My Son? | |
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House of Anubis: In the episode where Alfie's parents were visiting, his father seemed much more interested in and proud of Jerome, to the point where he offered Jerome the job of his apprentice and gave him all the credit for Alfie's achievements. It wasn't helped by Jerome himself being eager to take the spotlight. Because Alfie spent the entire time trying to seem important and smart for his father and was sitting right there when it was happening, he wasn't at all happy with this. | |
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In the Twelve Forever episode "The Mall Forever", Esther goes to the mall with Reggie and her mother Judy. Judy and Esther quickly establish a rapport sorely lacking between Reggie and her mother, mostly because they're both much more feminine than Reggie and Esther is wanting for a maternal figure with her mom being so busy. | |
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Friends: In season nine Rachel mentions that when she was dating Ross his mother claimed Rachel was "the daughter she never had". Monica, who is Ross' actual sister, is not happy to hear this. | |
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Sword at Sunset: King Arthur's estimation of the relative merits of his Worthy Opponent Cerdic of Wessex and his Bastard Bastard Medraut is all too apparent. | |
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There's a comic twist on this in Harry Enfield and Chums. In one of the Kevin and Perry sketches Kevin's parents ask him why he has to be so rude and nasty to them all the time, unlike the shy and polite Perry. Of course this is immediately subverted when Kevin takes a phone call from Perry's parents and becomes shy and polite while talking to them, then puts Perry on who is immediately rude and nasty to them. | |
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Kali Belladonna takes this trope up to Yandere levels in regards to Ruby Rose in Kali Wants A Kitty. Kali feels that she had failed in raising Blake simply because the latter did not grow up the way the former intended her to, and thus sees Ruby as an alternate, more ideal daughter, and is willing to kill anyone who stands in her way of attaining her. The story has two Alternate Endings: Ending One has Kali effectively lobotomizing Ruby into becoming her daughter after framing Yang for the murders she committed, while Ending Two has Yang kill Kali, but in doing so, becomes exactly like her. | |
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Alex Rider: A variant that does not include the villain being disappointed in his actual son is seen in Skeleton Key. In fact, Alexei Sarov takes a liking to Alex specifically because he reminds him of his (deceased) son. Eventually, Sarov starts trying to convert Alex to be his Replacement Goldfish. | |
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