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The Duffel Blog (Website)

 The Duffel Blog (Website)
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The Duffel Blog (Website)
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TheDuffelBlog
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The Duffel Blog, frequently described as a military version of The Onion, takes a similar satirical approach to reporting on everyday life in the weird and wonderful world of the US Military. It was founded in March of 2012 by Marine veteran Paul Szoldra, and has also expanded into "radio" and video, in the form of humorous clips of soldiers in their natural habitat taken from the internet.Much like its civilian counterpart, people have mistaken The Duffel Blog for a legitimate news source, generating much hilarity in the comments section of each article. Unfortunately, this occasionally extends to legitimate news media organizations as well.The Duffel Blog also runs satirical advice columns written by cast of colorful characters like Top the Non-Friendly Neighborhood First Sergeant, a wise, crusty old relic of the older and less politically correct military; the Barracks Lawyer, who dispenses his own unique brand of legal advice; and the Public Affairs Officer, who gives canned responses to just about everything.
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Ripped from the Headlines
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Ripped from the Headlines: They regularly post articles poking fun at current news stories involving the US military, such as unhelpful advice from the Coast Guard to its personnel about how to cope with not being paid during a government shutdown.
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Memetic Badass
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Memetic Badass: General James Mattis of the Marine Corps is shaping up to be one In-Universe.
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Obstructive Bureaucrat
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Obstructive Bureaucrat: Subverted — "Navy Acidentally Appoints Career Counselor Who Helps Sailors Advance Their Careers"
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Deadly Training Area
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Deadly Training Area: "Pentagon Announces Pre-Deployment Training To Take Place In Detroit And Chicago"
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Black Comedy
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Black Comedy: And how!
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Throwing Out the Script
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Throwing Out the Script: "General’s Controversial Graduation Speech Sparks Riots, 11 Killed"
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Poe's Law
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Poe's Law: The reason so many of the articles can be mistakenly accepted at face value is because the military lifestyle in Real Life can occasionally be patently absurd.
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Unfortunate Implications
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Unfortunate Implications: In-Universe — "African-American Skipper Makes History, Takes Command of USS Nathan Bedford Forrest"
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Stop Being Stereotypical
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Stop Being Stereotypical: "Atheist Lieutenant Annoys Entire Platoon Into Christianity"
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Cybernetics Eat Your Soul
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Cybernetics Eat Your Soul: Averted — "Amputee Finds Robotic Leg Just As Cool As He Thought It Would Be"
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Drill Sergeant Nasty
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Drill Sergeant Nasty: Turned upside down with "Self-described ‘sheep dog’ actually more of an asshole than anything else". The nasty part comes when he is off the training field.
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You Go, Girl!
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You Go, Girl!: "Women’s Rights Activist Demands ‘Camouflage Ceiling’ Brought Down, More Females Killed In Combat"
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Reality Is Unrealistic
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Reality Is Unrealistic: When seemingly absurd military news breaks in Real Life, the Duffel Blog's twitter feed will post a link with the comment "Should have been Duffel Blog".
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Bears Are Bad News
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Bears Are Bad News: "Grizzly Bear Wanders Into Unlocked Recruiting Office, Joins Navy" "Navy Investigators: No Suspects In Alleged Shipboard Bear Attacks"
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Enhanced Interrogation Techniques
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Enhanced Interrogation Techniques: "US Denies Prisoner Torture, Allegations Of Forced Listening To Justin Bieber, Rebecca Black"
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Never My Fault
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Never My Fault: "Corps’ Lone Thief Apprehended; Marines Rejoice, Burn Missing Gear Statements" "Woefully Unqualified Veteran Blames Rejection on Anti-Veteran Tech Company"
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Crippling Overspecialization
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Crippling Overspecialization: "Sailor Runs World Record 1.5 Mile, Fails Pushup Portion of Fitness Test"
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Armed Farces
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Armed Farces: Of course!
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Continuity Nod
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Continuity Nod: Many articles reference and build upon previous articles. Sometimes the only connection is the topic, with the writers of the later piece seemingly unaware of the previous one.
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Mood Whiplash
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Mood Whiplash: On occasion, an article will start out farcical before taking a hard right turn into more serious emotional fare, most commonly in the Opinion pieces.
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Space Marine
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Space Marine: "Space Marine: Oh, You Think My Job Is Cool? Try Police Calling In Zero Gravity
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Face–Heel Turn
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Face–Heel Turn: "Afghan Army Soldier Attacks US Troops, Fails Miserably" "Afghan Soldier Accidentally Shoots Taliban He Mistook For US Marine"
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Fun with Acronyms
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Fun with Acronyms: "DoD Unveils New Troop Leading Steps For Military, ‘RIMJOBS’ To Streamline Mission Planning"
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Tokyo Rose
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Tokyo Rose: "Vietnam Veterans Outraged Over Navy Christening Of USS Jane Fonda"
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Irony
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Irony: "Bitter Irony For Coast Guard, Seaman Apprentice Arrested For Piracy"
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Human Sacrifice
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Human Sacrifice: "Navy Chief Indoctrination Culminates In Human Sacrifice"
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Shout-Out
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Shout-Out: "USSOUTHCOM Reports Unexplained Murders in South American Jungle" "Defense Secretary Discovers Magical Realm In Pentagon Coat Closet"
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Even the Rats Won't Touch It
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Even The Rats Won't Touch It: "New MRE literally just bag of shit", Marines still prefer it to the Veggie Omelet MRE.
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Have I Mentioned I Am Gay?
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Have I Mentioned I Am Gay?: "Nobody Asks, Soldier Still Tells About His New Boyfriend"
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Serial Escalation
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Serial Escalation: "Psychological Operations Debuts New 'Longest Tab'"
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Just Here for Godzilla
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Just Here for Godzilla: In-Universe, "Veteran Company Debuts Line Of Pro-3rd Amendment T-Shirts", lampooning the tendency of servicemembers to vocally defend the 1st and 2nd Amendments but ignore other aspects of the Constitution.
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Blasphemous Boast
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Blasphemous Boast: "Opinion: Hey, can you stop comparing me to American soldiers?" has Jesus be getting tired of them.
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Inter-Service Rivalry
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Interservice Rivalry: "Tired Of Chair Force Nickname, Air Force Colonel Bans Chairs" "'Everyone Poops' Added To Commandant's Professional Reading List" "Marine Corps Marathon Spawns Less-Successful Marine Corps Spelling Bee" "Army Study Finds Marines' Tun Tavern Was Actually a Gay Bar"
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Screw This, I'm Outta Here
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Screw This, I'm Outta Here: "Navy Worried Sailors Quitting 'Faster Than They Can Be Fired'"
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Ridiculously Human Robots
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Ridiculously Human Robots: "Air Force MQ-9 Reaper Diagnosed With PTSD, Refuses To Fly"
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List of Transgressions
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List of Transgressions: “Commander Relieved for Violating Entire UCMJ.” The Department of Defense has been rocked by the firing and court-martial of a high-ranking Marine officer for allegedly violating every single article of the Uniform Code of Military Justice (UCMJ).
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Running Gag
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Running Gag: Jokes about PT belts, abhorred by troops due to be being forced to wear them like children out at Halloween.
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Forever War
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Forever War: More than a few examples, over the course of several years: "Afghanistan: A Look Back On America’s Longest War (January 2015)" "War in Afghanistan turns 16, earns driver’s license (October 2017)" "Wow! This man was born on 9/11 and gets to fight in the same war it inspired (September 2018)" "Now 17, Afghan War still pissed it never had quinceañera (October 2018)
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The Duffel Blog (Website)

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