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The Last Dragonslayer

 The Last Dragonslayer
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TVTItem
 The Last Dragonslayer
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The Last Dragonslayer
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TheLastDragonslayer1
 The Last Dragonslayer
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Advertisement:propertag.cmd.push(function() { proper_display('tvtropes_mobile_ad_1'); })First published in 2010, The Last Dragonslayer is the first book in a tetralogy of the same name by Jasper Fforde and his first offering for young adult readers.Once upon a time dragons roamed freely; the world was filled with great heroes like The Dragonslayer and powerful wizards like the Mighty Shandar, who made their living commanding the seas or creating strange beasts; and magic was plentiful. That was a long time ago.Nowadays the Dragonpact struck by Shandar ensures Dragons remain within the bounds of magically protected Dragonlands scattered throughout the UnUnited Kingdom; there hasn't been any real need for a hero like the Dragonslayer in over a hundred years; and magic is at a historic low ebb with no signs of a return in sight. But there are still wizards, and those wizards still need to make a living.Advertisement:propertag.cmd.push(function() { proper_display('tvtropes_mobile_ad_2'); })Enter protagonist Jennifer Strange. Jennifer is a lot of things: fifteen years old, a foundling, an indentured servant, and current acting manager of Kazam — the premier Mystical Arts Management agency in the Kingdom of Hereford. Much of the world has moved on from the need for curses and spells in favor of modern technology, so Jennifer scrambles to keep the lights on by hiring out the flying carpeteers to deliver pizzas, the precogs to predict the weather, and the wizards to wallpaper lofts. In the ongoing absence of company owner Mr. Zambini, Jennifer is the one person who stands between her fleet of curmudgeonly sorcerers and total fiscal insolvency. On top of that, she's been tasked with training her replacement (a resourceful fellow foundling by the name of Horton "Tiger" Prawns) and keeping her slightly-illegal pet Quarkbeast (an animal something like a cross between a hyena and a wood chipper) out of trouble. Jennifer has her hands full keeping Kazam up and running while magic dies a slow, prolonged death.Advertisement:propertag.cmd.push(function() { proper_display('tvtropes_mobile_ad_3'); })So naturally it comes as a shock when a prophecy predicts the death of Maltcassion, the last living dragon in the UnUnited Kingdom, at the hands of the illustrious Dragonslayer - an event that heralds "Big Magic," whatever that may be. Upon Maltcassion's death, the magically protected Dragonlands he rules over will be freed up for development — something the megalomaniacal King Snodd IV and his partners at Consolidated Useful Stuff (or ConStuff) are keen to capitalize on. It's even more shocking when Jennifer inherits the mantle of "Dragonslayer" and the duty to dispatch the last dragon, should the need arise.Trouble is, Jennifer doesn't want to kill a Maltcassion. In fact, she takes a moral stand against the indiscriminate slaying of innocent dragons. But destiny is a tricky thing, and it seems everyone has their own reason for wanting Jennifer to get on with offing the old drake. A plot to frame Maltcassion for a capital breach of the Dragonpact is afoot, and so is a plan to force the latest Dragonslayer's hand (or else eliminate her from the equation).The world clamors for the last dragon's death and King Snodd IV orders Jennifer to execute her duty or else. The clock is ticking on the prophesized last days of the last dragon. Jennifer's only allies are a fellow orphan, an overzealous guard dog, and the de-powered witches and wizards of Kazam. With nothing more than her wits to guide her, her grit to keep her going, a rusty 58' Volkswagen beetle and a supremely Cool Sword that comes with the title of "Dragonslayer," just what can one girl do?The Last Dragonslayer is followed by The Song of the Quarkbeast.
 The Last Dragonslayer
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2022-03-06T15:25:08Z
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Dropped link to TheProphecy: Not a Feature - ITEM
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Hydra Problem
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_144fc7c2
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Hydra Problem: "Slaying" a dragon leads to the one dragon magically dividing into two, both of which retain something of the memories and personality of their "parent." The only way to truly kill of a dragon is to sequester it until it dies of old age.
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Fantastic Nature Reserve
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_23ca8dff
comment
Fantastic Nature Reserve: The Dragonpact struck by Shandar and the dragons set out the boundaries of the Dragonlands: individual parcels of land where dragons would not be disturbed by humans. Each dragon had their own domain, and agreed not to leave to burn down any villages or steal cattle. Upon a dragon's death, their Dragonlands would be free to be claimed by the first man to set foot in them. By the time the story starts there's only one dragon left, Maltcassion, and only one pristine Dragonland remaining. The boundaries of the Dragonlands are actually a Containment Field designed to keep the dragons trapped and unable to reproduce.
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Rapid Aging
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Rapid Aging: The fate of Dragonslayer Brian Spalding, after he appoints Jennifer his successor in the field of Dragon Slaying. He was over 150 years old, and only "Old Magic" kept him from passing away until he could pass the torch. Once his job is complete, he ages decades in the span of a minute and dwindles away to "a fine smattering of gray powder."
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Would Hurt a Child
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Would Hurt a Child: Would hurt a teen in this case, as Jennifer is fifteen, but the death of the last dragon brings out the nasty side of several characters: Sir Matt Grifflon was willing to kill Jennifer in order to take her position as the Dragonslayer. Gordon van Gordon was also willing to shoot Jennifer if she tried to interfere with ConStuff's plot to stake their claim on most of the territory in the Dragonlands before the last dragon was slain.
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Paper-Thin Disguise
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_48b9731f
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Paper-Thin Disguise: Being the subject of a massive manhunt after "disappearing" into Kazam, Jennifer can't show her face in public. To sneak out of Kazam and back into the Dragonstation, Tiger comes up with the idea that she should disguise herself as a Troll War Widow with a wig, an old dress, and a cardboard sign begging for coins. The Quark Beast is disguised as her baby with a bonnet and a baby pram to sneak him past some of King Snodd's guards. The guards are complete idiots though, so it works perfectly.
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Gem Tissue
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_56e0d4cf
comment
Gem Tissue: Dragons have a large gem in their forehead that glows slightly. In the olden days, knights would take the gem as a trophy when they killed the dragon.
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The Berserker
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comment
The Berserker: "Berzerker" warriors are highly sought after fighters, and King Snodd employs a few of them. At the end of the book, Jennifer discovers that she is a berzerker who can control her temper — a very rare combination.
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Awesome McCoolname
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Awesome Mc Coolname: Maltcassion, the last dragon in the UnUnited Kingdoms.
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Containment Field
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_62c1b7cd
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Containment Field: The Dragonlands are surrounded by a magical barrier that only the Dragonslayer or the Dragonslayer's apprentice may pass through - anyone else who tries is instantly vaporized. But what no living human knows is that the force field works both ways - humans can't get in, and dragons can't get out. This was part of Shandar's plan to eliminate the dragons once and for all. With the dragons imprisoned in separate territories with no way to meet or mingle, there was no way for them to reproduce naturally. And without dragons leaving the Dragonlands to commit acts that would break the Dragonpact, there would be no reason for the Dragonslayer to slay any dragons (which turns one dragon into two). Once the last dragon died of old age, there would be no more.
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The Pardon
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_6787588e
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The Pardon: Jennifer's "betrayal of the crown" is eventually "reluctantly" pardoned by King Snodd, after she spends a week or two in jail. A quote from The Song of the Quarkbeast reveals that she found the conditions in jail oddly relaxing:
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Justice by Other Legal Means
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_69d46274
comment
Justice by Other Legal Means: More like In-justice By Other Legal Means, when this trope is attempted by King Snodd against Jennifer. After she gets stuck with the title of Dragonslayer and pledges not to slay the last dragon, King Snodd wants her out of the picture and replaced with someone who will kill the dragon. When he finds he can't bribe Jennifer into giving up the position, he sics the Intimidating Revenue Service on her with a massive tax and utility bill attached to the Dragonstation, for which she assumed responsibility when she was appointed Dragonslayer.
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Only the Chosen May Wield
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_6aada778
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Only the Chosen May Wield: Only the Dragonslayer or their apprentice can wield the sword Exhorbitus and the lance of the Dragonslayers. Anyone who isn't the Dragonslayer disappears in a puff of smoke.
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Something for Everyone
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_7bbb95df
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Something for Everyone: The Pollyanna Stone is a magical artifact that morphs into whatever the holder expects or hopes to see. When given to Jennifer unprompted, she sees a newspaper declaring that she won't be forced to kill the dragon. With a little bit of trickery, Jennifer uses the stone to fool the royal guards into believing that they're holding her Troll War Widow identification papers.
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Broken Pedestal
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_868409c
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Broken Pedestal: Jennifer has a bit of an embarrassing crush on Sir Matt Grifflon, a minor noble and Hereford's very own rock star/ heartthrob. The first time she encounters him in person, he's been sent to the Dragonstation by the king to murder her and take over her job as the Dragonslayer. Jennifer's crush evaporates after that encounter.
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The Chosen One
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_89631688
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The Chosen One: Jennifer, at least according to the prophecy.
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Overly Long Name
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_8f900ccd
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Overly Long Name/Repetitive Name: Jennifer's assistant Dragonslayer is Gordon van Gordon Gordonson ap Gordon-Gordon of Gordon.
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The Tape Knew You Would Say That
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_9350a0b9
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The Tape Knew You Would Say That: Jennifer encounters two magically recorded messages from the Mighty Shandar. Both times, the recording mentions that it's a recording just as she begins to wonder if it's a recording.
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Intimidating Revenue Service
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_9d5a2cdf
comment
Intimidating Revenue Service: Invoked by King Snodd as part of his attempted Justice by Other Legal Means ploy, in an effort to get rid of Jennifer. Once she assumes the mantle of Dragonslayer and responsibility for the Dragonstation, King Snodd immediately dumps a debt of nearly 100,000 moolah from back-charged property tax, rent, gas, water, and electricity in her lap. If she doesn't pay up in a few hours, she faces some serious jail time. Even if Jennifer wanted to dispute the legality of the debt, she'd be tied up in court for weeks - long past the last dragon's predicted demise.
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DogDiesAtTheEnd
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Dog Dies at the End: Gordon shoots Jennifer's loyal Quarkbeast companion when it leaps to defend her.
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Cool Sword
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Cool Sword: Exhorbitus, the sword of the Dragonslayers. It's an Absurdly Sharp Blade that can cut through boulders, brick walls, and carbide steel as if they were wet paper. It's got a giant ruby "the size of an orange" embedded in the pommel. And anyone who isn't the Dragonslayer is vaporized if they try to touch it. (And apparently, it can only be sharpened with a banana.)
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Think Nothing of It
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Think Nothing of It: Lady Mawgon gifts Jennifer and Tiger a Pollyanna Stone to aid them in their quest to get back to the Dragonstation, but she threatens to make Jennifer's life hell if anyone finds out that Mawgon has been anything but horrid to the foundlings.
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MegaCorp
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_aa8dcc21
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Mega-Corp: Consolidated Useful Stuff, or ConStuff, and their many subsidiaries.
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The Dragonslayer
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_b780431d
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The Dragonslayer: A tenured position in the UnUnited Kingdoms, where there must always be an official Dragonslayer to deal with any dragons accused of breaking the Dragonpact by leaving the Dragonlands.
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Corporate-Sponsored Superhero
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_d06ff4fc
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Corporate-Sponsored Superhero: Not a superhero per se, but a Corporate Sponsored Dragonslayer. When Jennifer takes up the mantle of Dragonslayer several companies start a bidding war to get her to endorse their product, with Yummy Flakes cereal and Fizzi-Pop soda leading the charge. In order to save the Dragonstation from being repossessed by King Snodd (and to keep herself out of debtor's prison after assuming responsibility for the back-charged property tax, rent, gas, water, and electricity), Jennifer accepts a 100,000 moolah contract with Fizzi-Pop.
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 The Last Dragonslayer / int_db71d717
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Thanatos Gambit
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_db71d717
comment
Thanatos Gambit: The dragons realized that Shandar's magic had trapped them, individually, in the Dragonlands. Without intermingling and reproducing the natural way, they would eventually go extinct. Getting the Dragonslayer to kill a single dragon to give rise to two successors would only result in two dragons still trapped. Maltcassion planned for his own death meticulously, as it would trigger Big Magic that could undo Shandar's pact and create two successor dragons who would be free.
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The Mole
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_e70127
comment
The Mole: Gordon van Gordon. He was part of a long-running plot by ConStuff to put an agent of theirs in place as a Dragonslayer's apprentice, in order to claim the Dragonlands before the barrier could come down. The particular conspiracy had been in play for over 60 years before they had a chance to embed their operative.
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 The Last Dragonslayer / int_e83c4c85
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Deadly Force Field
 The Last Dragonslayer / int_e83c4c85
comment
Deadly Force Field: Anyone, bar the Dragonslayer or the Dragonslayer's apprentice, who attempts to cross into the Dragonlands will find themselves vaporized by the barrier that surrounds it. The barrier is actually a Containment Field. Dragons don't just stay in the Dragonlands for fear of violating the Dragonpact: dragons cannot get out of their individual parcels of land, and humans can't get in.
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NamedWeapon
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Named Weapon: Exhorbitus, sword of the Dragonslayers.
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The Last Dragonslayer

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