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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future
- 115 statements
- 21 feature instances
- 14 referencing feature instances
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What better way to show the passage of time in Time Travel stories than by having humans lack appendixes and other vestigial organs? Progress! Never mind that it takes millions of years for significant evolution like that to occur and the fact animals like whales and snakes (specifically snakes like boas, pythons, and slender blind snakes) have had vestigial leg bones for so long that it's unlikely that humans would shrug off their own vestigial organs anytime within a hundred thousand years. Evolution is a result of natural selection, and while they're unnecessary, there isn't much evolutionary pressure against having an appendix. If something is truly vestigial, there is little advantage in getting rid of it so evolution will be particularly gradual in getting rid of vestigial organs, if it gets rid of them at all. Whenever a feature becomes useless to an animal it does tend to slowly disappear since genetic mutations that lead to its degeneration are not weeded out by natural selection. There is also the issue of the resources, minor as they presumably are, that the animal uses to grow these useless features; there is therefore some benefit to losing these vestiges, but there's not much in it. Of course, this trope can easily be justified through genetic modification — the appendix didn't naturally evolve away, humans simply altered their own genome to weed out the junk. A note on the appendix itself: The appendix has historically been thought a useless, vestigial or even dangerously self-destructive organ, but Science Marches On — it's still considered vestigial, but not necessarily useless. In the last few years scientists have begun to suspect that it is actually important to the body, as a reservoir of the "good bacteria" species that populate the colon and are necessary for digestion. When the colon's population is thrown out of whack by infection, diarrhea, or the like, the bacteria "hiding" in the appendix can recolonize it and return the necessary balance. There are also suggestions that this reservoir is used in training the immune system of babies and young children. It's still a lot easier to live without one than it is to live without most of your other organs, but it does seem to serve a useful (if non-vital) purpose. This is what we would expect from evolution; if you have something useless hanging around, it can be repurposed. Moreover, a smaller appendix might more easily become infected, putting up a barrier to its fading away and selecting for a larger appendix. Do not confuse with We Will Not Use an Index in the Future. Also see We Will Have Perfect Health in the Future and Evolutionary Levels. |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_17143e0c | type |
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The futuristic anatomical doll in "Mimsy Were the Borogoves" lacks an appendix, and a distinguishable large intestine for that matter. It also has at least one entirely new organ system, suggesting that changes were engineered rather than evolved. | |
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Mimsy Were the Borogoves | hasFeature |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_2615df3d | type |
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The War of the Worlds (1898): In designing the Martians, H. G. Wells started from a humanoid body plan, then stripped off everything — limbs, digestive tracts, sexual reproduction — that he thought mechanization and/or medical technology could potentially make obsolete. All that he left them was a giant head, a few tendrils for pushing buttons, and the ability to breathe. Instead of eating, they drain captured aliens and humans of blood and inject it into their bodies. | |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_261c8d3f | type |
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The Simpsons: Parodied when a news report says that scientists predict people will evolve an additional finger in the future. Characters on the show have only three fingers and a thumb on each hand. In the episode "Lady Bouvier's Lover", Homer is worried that Abe marrying Marge's mother would make him and Marge brother and sister, and as a result turn the kids into "...horrible freaks with pink skin, no overbites, and five fingers on each hand!" Right after Homer says this, the camera points at the kids, who instead of being drawn in the Simpsons style, are drawn "horrifically" normal. |
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The Simpsons | hasFeature |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_27617023 | type |
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molesworth parodies the idea (which showed up often enough in 1950s SF) in Whizz for Atomms, with typically idiosyncratic molesworth spelling: | |
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An alien version in the Giants Series — the Ganymeans genetically modified themselves to remove their secondary circulatory system, which was primarily a defense mechanism. Then it turned out that they needed it after all. | |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_4e45b093 | type |
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In The Big Bang Theory, Sheldon argues that his pinky toes and lateral incisors are smaller than average, indicating that he is a more advanced form of humanity, a "homo novus", and thus is too evolved to learn how to drive. Leonard would beg to differ, but doesn't bother. | |
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The Big Bang Theory | hasFeature |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_597e4961 | type |
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While it is not employed in Part 3 of The Gods Themselves, the eugenics-conscious moon separatists want to use genetic engineering to get rid of various organs which they consider unnecessary, like molars (the artificial food of the Moon requires little chewing). | |
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The Gods Themselves | hasFeature |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_6d36c7b2 | type |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_6d36c7b2 | comment |
In the 2012 Alpha Flight miniseries, those who have been through the Master of the World's evolution/brainwashing machine can be identified because they only have four toes. They also don't have an appendix, but that's a little harder to verify in the street. | |
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Pebble in the Sky: Imperial officials realize Joseph Schwartz is a time traveler by the fact he has wisdom teeth and an unusually large appendix. Justified by the future Earth being covered in radiation after a nuclear war, which would increase mutation rates vastly. How much time passed between the "present" and the "future" is disputed by the fanbase due to inconsistencies within the series (One character estimates between fifty thousand to a hundred thousand years since humanity only existed on a single planet, even assuming that humans didn't evolve simultaneously on multiple planets.) | |
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Pebble in the Sky | hasFeature |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_74059a6a | type |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_74059a6a | comment |
This is actually a plot point in The End of Eternity, when two of the main characters, both time travelers, who were born three million years apart notice that the only difference between them is the lack of wisdom teeth and the lack of appendix in the one from the later time. They (perhaps hastily) draw the conclusion that Eternity is trying to prevent human evolution. | |
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The End of Eternity | hasFeature |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_960062b7 | comment |
My Hero Academia uses toe joints as indicators. People with two joints in their pinky toe are considered part of the old generation and are quirkless. Meanwhile, people with one joint are the next stage of human evolution, and are born with Quirks. | |
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My Hero Academia (Manga) | hasFeature |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_b559156 | type |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_b559156 | comment |
The genetic manipulation side is handled fairly well in Schismatrix. The Shapers are engineered to not only go without appendices, but also to not need any of the bacteria humans currently need to digest food properly, allowing Shaper habitats to be free of any non-engineered nasties. Unfortunately for them, not everybody has this advantage; Shapers going from the aseptic environment to a bacterial one tend to get diarrhea, nausea and horrible rashes. Non-Shapers living in their habitats have to agree to get their intestines pumped and eat regular doses of foul-tasting yoghurt full of digestive enzymes to make up for it. | |
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Schismatrix | hasFeature |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_b5cc0abd | type |
We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future | |
We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_b5cc0abd | comment |
Parodied in Dr. Katz, Professional Therapist: when Ben is due to have his wisdom teeth removed, Laura mentions she never had them, which her dentist attributed to her being "more evolved". They end up getting into an argument over the veracity of the statement. | |
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Dr. Katz, Professional Therapist | hasFeature |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_ba4b95c9 | type |
We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future | |
We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_ba4b95c9 | comment |
Losing the appendix is mentioned as one of the results of human evolution in Time Trax. | |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_bb55a676 | type |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_bb55a676 | comment |
Legion of Super-Heroes would have us believe that in 1,000 years humans will grow an extra heart. Forgot the fact that an extra pump in our chest would cause more problems than it would solve. | |
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Doctor Who: Lady Cassandra, from five billion years in the future, who appears in "The End of the World" and "New Earth", is the self-proclaimed "Last Human" and is nothing but eyes and a mouth on skin stretched trampoline-like in a frame, attached to her Brain in a Jar. However, in her case it's because she's had extensive plastic surgeries, not evolution, as the latter episode shows humans and human-descendants (and a younger version of Cassandra) who look perfectly normal. | |
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Doctor Who | hasFeature |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_d9919dda | comment |
Last and First Men: The Second Men are noted to lack several of the First Men's "useless excrescences"; for instance, they have no toes, tonsils or appendixes. | |
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In GURPS: Transhuman Space No Appendix is an advantage that the Alpha genetic upgrade and Zisudra parahuman have, both templates are intended to be an "ideal" human. | |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_e8f15e5b | comment |
In Captain French, or the Quest for Paradise, the titular protagonist has 2000 years (subjective time) or 20,000 years (objective time) over his new wife, who is only in her 50s (but looks 20 thanks to the omnipresent cure for aging). The first thing he does after taking her onboard his ship is to have her examined by the ship's Auto Doc. The doc reveals something horrible to French — she still has an appendix. Angry at the carelessness of her home planet's religious fanatics, he has the Auto Doc remove the "offending organ" despite the fact that there's nothing wrong with it. The justification is that it's too risky to have one in space, since it may burst while you're away from the med-bay (e.g., EVA). | |
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We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future / int_f83d9d5b | comment |
This trope was facetiously employed in Phil of the Future when Phil ran into a problem: he would have to be seen barefoot to stamp tomatoes in a farm on a class trip, but in his time, no one has pinky toes. To quote Phil's mother, "They won't lose their pinky toes for another 70 years." Ironically, pinky toes are actually used for balance. | |
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In the Doctor Who New Adventures spin-off novels, the companions Chris Cwej and Roz Forrester have no appendices. They're from the 30th Century. | |
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