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Ice-Cream Koan
- 849 statements
- 161 feature instances
- 182 referencing feature instances
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Something that looks like a Koan (a Zen Buddhist riddle meant to encourage contemplation), walks like a koan, quacks like a koan, but lacks… substance. It sounds meaningful at first, but after you think a moment, instead of getting some rush of insight, you realize that it is nothing more than nonsense, or just a joke dressed up in profundity's hand-me-downs. Like ice cream itself, it looks good and tastes good, but is ultimately just empty calories. Usually done for comedy value, but all too often a result of genuine pretensions on the part of the writers. Of course, some would argue that all koans are Ice Cream Koans, but then again others would argue that all Ice Cream Koans are genuine Koans. It's most likely a difference in intent (and/or pretension) that distinguishes the two. If done savvily enough, is indeed a form of Truth in Television—the point of a Zen koan (literally "public case", a story) is to show that contradiction is actually a delusion, and help the student let go of the mental habit of arranging things into dichotomies (because both extremes, despite their apparent contradiction, are actually one thing) and ultimately understand the Zen doctrine of non-duality. The Trope Namer above is one such example, despite containing an incredibly obvious pun.note Both cases are the same, wherein I give you ice cream: in the second case, I take away your lack of ice cream by giving you ice cream. Taken to the extreme (and stretched out), this becomes a full-fledged Word Salad Philosophy. If used as part of The Summation, can venture into Fauxlosophic Narration. If the koan is attributed to a certain ancient Chinese philosopher, it's Confucian Confusion. Compare Mistaken for Profound, Fauxlosophic Narration, Profound by Pop Song, Seemingly Profound Fool, When Is Purple, Metaphorgotten, Mind Screw. Compare and contrast "Shaggy Frog" Story. Contrast Proverbial Wisdom. For when the words are meant to make sense, see Meaningless Meaningful Words. Related to True Art Is Incomprehensible. Has nothing to do with actual Ice Cream, Sailor Moon Character or the absolute angel. Might be confused with the famous Confucian sayings (which are also Chinese, but not Buddhist), which tend to be recited in You No Take Candle English. |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_11b7db91 | type |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_11b7db91 | comment |
At the end of the Adventure Time episode "The Other Tarts", the Royal Tart-Toter shows up randomly to deliver this sage bit of wisdom: | |
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The phrases of the Zensunni sect from Dune are said to intended to be ice cream koans, similar to Zen as mentioned above. The difference is that they are intended to get the listener to recognize nonsense and obfuscation, regardless of how logically-constructed and reasonable it may appear. | |
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Dune | hasFeature |
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Also the scene in Mort where Princess Keli consults Cutwell and they decide to try the Discworld equivalent of I Ching. They get no information at all from "at evening the mollusc is silent among the almond blossom," and Cutwell concludes it probably lost something in translation. | |
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The Far Side parodied this once with the classic "if a tree falls in a forest" koan: | |
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One of the skits on Retro Game Master (or the Japanese original anyway) is to have a monk read aloud from a video game strategy guide, which makes the writing sound like prophetic wisdom. | |
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In Samurai Jack, Jack is communing with an ancient Monk in an attempt to regain his lost sword. When the Monk tries to offer Jack advice, Inner Jack (an amalgamation of Jack's anger and frustration) immediately accuses him of being this trope. | |
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Sluggy Freelance: In "The Quatrix", a simulated version of Riff defends taking Kiki to see the Oracle by saying that "The future and past are merely directions on the same road." When it turns out that he's only doing it so that they can get back to deathmatching, he asserts that "Sometimes, to be deep, we must act shallow." In "The Isle of the Ployees", the Great Eeoh says "wise" things that are only irrelevant marketing gibberish. |
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In The Gamers 2: Dorkness Rising, Brother Silence, a most stubborn monk (who is NOT an elf) converses mainly in these, until finally he spouts this winner: | |
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Plan 7 of 9 from Outer Space. TuMok of Mars relates how he consulted a 900-year old sage on Olympus Mons. After months of Ice Cream Koans and Word Salad Philosophy, he loses patience and bangs the sage's head against the hardest rock he can find. On recovering consciousness, the sage tells TuMok that he's discovered the wisdom he was looking for. "For it is only when you stop screwing around with this existential rubbish that you ever achieve anything." | |
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Koenieg in The Intercontinental Union of Disgusting Characters tended to spout these, much to the chagrin of ally and enemy alike. | |
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The Simpsons: Played for Laughs in a Treehouse of Horror episode. When every computer on earth crashes (Homer's fault, of course) leading to an apocalypse, Homer appears to be lampshading Lisa's sarcasm, but then turns out to be this: And in the episode "Colonel Homer", there's one that actually makes sense if you think about it, but it still amounts to a lame excuse: Subverted and played straight in an early episode featuring Lisa trying to teach Bart Buddhist philosophy. When she asks him: "What is the sound of one hand clapping?" he repeatedly curls up his hand so that his fingers smack the bottom of his palm, making a miniaturized clapping sound. |
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Every time Snake saves his data in Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty, Otacon will tell him a proverb and explain its meaning as a Call-Back to Mei Ling's role in the original Metal Gear Solid. However, he fails hilariously to explain their meanings. While the proverbs are legit, his rambling explanations of the meanings vary from wildly incorrect to technically correct but with the wrongest possible justification. If you save your game enough times and hear enough of Otacon's proverbs, Mei Ling actually shows up to deliver a proverb properly and scolds Otacon for losing the cheat sheet she gave him. | |
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Ice-Cream Koan | |
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Spice World includes these transparently nonsensical sayings: | |
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Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_29a0db82 | comment |
The Good Soldier Å vejk: "Let things have been as they have been, nonetheless they've been somehow; so far it has never been that things would be nohow." | |
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Raising Arizona: Well, there's what's right, and there's what's right, and never the twain shall meet. | |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_2e6e838 | comment |
Yogi Berra, a former Major League Baseball player, coach, and manager (and probable namesake of Yogi Bear), is one of the richest sources of Ice Cream Koans in popular culture. Over his career, he coined hundreds of Captain Obvious "Yogi-isms," published in multiple books, such as "it ain't over 'til it's over" and "you can observe a lot just by watching." | |
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Ross O. Donovan is an outright fountain of these on Steam Train and Game Grumps, to the point Dan has begun keeping a list of so-called "Rossisms". Typically they're the result of him, being from Australia, messing up western sayings or being so distracted by a game he says something without realizing just how nonsensical and silly it actually was. To wit: | |
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From The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (1978): | |
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Warrior (as reviewed by Noah "Spoony" Antwiler) is practically MADE of these. | |
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Ozy and Millie occasionally makes Zen jokes using Ice Cream Koans, like showing a Zen map ("Go one place and not another") or a Zen board game ("It's your turn to move by not moving"). X-ing by not X-ing is a Running Gag in the comic. It's taken to even higher levels of absurdity when Llewellyn runs for president on the Zen Party ticket, and declares that he's running by not running. Ozy asks him why he's running, and he says he's running because he's not not running, and thus that he's not not running by not not not running. |
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Wondermark combines this with metaphorgotten: Sounds like the point was meant the be "A sword can't be used to elevate someone to your level" or something. May not be complete nonsense, it may just be that the delivery was scatterbrained. |
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The playable character Zer0 from Borderlands 2 speaks in Haiku for 90% of his dialogue. | |
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In the first episode of Mr. Show, a priest after he discovers he's been tricked by his friends gives us one of these: | |
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Humanx Commonwealth: An ominous line from Mid-Flinx could be considered a subversion. When Teal informs Aimee that "You do not wear the cristif, the cristif wears you", Aimee assumes the native woman is just invoking some superstitious ice cream koan about the flower in her hair. In truth, Teal means that the flower is literally wearing Aimee, as it's an invasive parasite that's covertly driven its tendrils into Aimee's body and is consuming her from within. | |
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Constable Visit's protest placard in The Fifth Elephant is the Omnian proverb "What profit it a kingdom if the oxen be deflated?" | |
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Subverted in The Secret Show. In the episode "The Trousers of Doom", the saying "Is not the cheesecake still a cheesecake after it has been consumed by the ox?" turns out to actually be a plot point. | |
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The increasingly nonsensical sayings given by The Sphinx in Mystery Men. For example: "When you can balance a tack hammer on your head, you will head off your foes with a balanced attack." Mr. Furious later points out to the others that the Sphinx's koans are just rearranging the words in a given question asked him. Nobody else seems to see his point. Lampshaded when Sphinx tries to get Furious to calm down: | |
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Cernd from Baldur's Gate II verges perilously close to this trope sometimes... and sometimes he dives right in. Viconia the drow spoofs this in a conversation with the Druid / Fighter Jaheria, in an attempt to get a rise out of her. |
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Godot in Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney – Trials and Tribulations is prone to coffee-flavoured versions of this. Everyone keeps asking him to start making sense, but he ignores them. Phoenix refers to them as part of his Coffeenese. | |
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Master Fung says these a lot in Xiaolin Showdown. When questioned on it, he admits he has a desk calendar. | |
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Dilbert: The comic strip occasionally gave us gems from the Elbonians. A wise Elbonian once said, "in a race between a turtle and a rock, don't varnish your clams." |
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In The Dresden Files novel Dead Beat, wacky Medical Examiner Butters gets stuck riding in a car Dresden's magic frizzled into repeating obnoxiously, "The door is ajar." When Dresden apologizes, Butters claims it was actually quite peaceful, Zen almost. | |
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Garfield offers this observation: | |
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Ice-Cream Koan | |
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The Support class in Monday Night Combat is full of these, largely due to his poor mastery of the English language. "When a tree dies, only the woodpeckers profit." | |
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Discworld: Spoofed in Thief of Time: Lu-Tze's way, the Way of Mrs. Cosmopolite, is entirely composed of mundane, common-sense sayings such as "There is no time like the present." One could argue the normally irreverent Lu-Tze treats these as deeply profound to make a point. This was a Brick Joke from references to other followers of The Way of Mrs. Cosmopolite. It is shown in Thief of Time the reason for that is because 1) Wisdom seems more wise if it's from far away, and 2) the common-sense sayings are coincidentally slightly different from but functionally synonymous to phrases from the Books of Wen the Eternally Surprised (though some vary into Malaproper, such as "there is no time but/like the present"). This is also a good example to show that even sayings that make perfect sense in their original cultural background can seem like Ice-Cream Koans when translated into another language, especially the language of a completely separate culture. I mean, look at "There is no time like the present." with an outsider's eyes, someone who doesn't have knowledge of common English metaphors and sayings. Just taken literally, as Lu-Tze's fellow monks would have, it doesn't really make a lot of sense or would require some deep thinking about it to divine the meaning - thus making the aphorism seem much more wise and clever than it was in the culture where it's just a "common sense" saying that everyone knows. The same is most likely true when you translate a lot of Asian sayings or religious texts into Western languages. The passwords for the secret society in Guards! Guards! are meaningless phrases that the society thought sounded wise, like "The significant owl hoots in the night" and "Yet verily the rose is within the thorn." This is then repeatedly lampshaded when several secret societies meet in the same street (or the same building at different times) and are so similar that a newcomer only realizes halfway through the password exchange that he's at the wrong door. Also the scene in Mort where Princess Keli consults Cutwell and they decide to try the Discworld equivalent of I Ching. They get no information at all from "at evening the mollusc is silent among the almond blossom," and Cutwell concludes it probably lost something in translation. Constable Visit's protest placard in The Fifth Elephant is the Omnian proverb "What profit it a kingdom if the oxen be deflated?" The Ephebian philosopher Didactylos (Small Gods) generally prefers aphorisms such as "You can't trust any bugger further you can throw him, and there's nothing you can do about it, so let's have a drink," but is also responsible for "It's a wise crow that knows which way the camel points". In a preface to "The Sea and Little Fishes", Terry Pratchett explains that the title is a reference to the ancient saying "The big sea does not care which way the little fishes swim," which he made up at some point and thought sounded "wise, in a slightly stupid sort of way." Lu-Tze would go on to use it in Night Watch. The Agatean philosopher Lin Ty Wheadle is mentioned in several books, most notably Interesting Times, where his aphorisms included "An ass may do the work of an ox in a time of no horses". The Discworld Companion says that once you've got the knack, you can make these up at a rate of three a minute. The Compleat Ankh-Morpork City Guide includes a talk by the Reverend Lannister of the Temple of Small Gods, which spoofs the sort of vague analogistic spirtuality found in The BBC's religious slots Thought for the Day on Radio 4 and Pause for Thought on Radio 2, and concludes "Who amongst us can say that we have never been the thing that is stuck in the drawer?" |
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Kung Pow! Enter the Fist: Mu Shu Fasa deliberately baffles The Chosen One with a Koan. For the record, the Dark Council turns out to be aliens. French aliens. |
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The titular character of Xavier: Renegade Angel speaks this as a primary language, and he believes every word of it too. | |
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In World of Warcraft, many of the Pandaren's /silly commands are these. | |
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Maverick is fond of this trope. The leads, brothers Bret and Bart Maverick, often quote words of wisdom from their "Pappy". Many of them are actually these. | |
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The sign-off phrase of I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue is always a variation of this concerning Time, Eternity, Fate and Destiny. The Other Wiki gives us: | |
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The Stoic Club in EarthBound (1994), where people stare at a rock and make strange philosophical conversation. To be fair, they're under the influence of some pretty weird cake. | |
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In Monkey Island 2: LeChuck's Revenge, Herman Toothrot asks Guybrush "If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, what color is the tree?" After guessing about forty different colors, Guybrush correctly guesses "All colors": | |
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In an episode of Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, the crane spouts random food jokes that make no sense as if they were kernels of wisdom. Naturally, Sonic spouts one at the end and makes it about his Trademark Favorite Food. | |
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Star Wars: The Clone Wars: Every single episode has a "Jedi quote" after the opening logo, the sort of thing you'd expect to find on a motivational poster. While a few manage to be genuinely inspirational, quite a few are nonsensical, redundant, or just plain stupid. | |
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Bennett the Sage makes several of these during Suburban Knights by switching words around. Example: "To answer the phone, the phone must answer you." | |
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Odin in The Order of the Stick, being a slightly Mad God, spouts some of these. Sometimes you have to wonder whether they've actually got a point, though. | |
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In The Dick Van Dyke Show, Sally frequently quotes her Aunt Agnes, much to the confusion of her fellow writers, and herself. | |
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raocow would sometimes say seemingly political or controversial sounding phrases in his Let's Plays that might just actually be meaningful and insightful. But if you think of it for a while, you will realize that it's just a plain Non Sequitur. | |
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raocow (Lets Play) | hasFeature |
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In Disgaea 3: Absence of Justice, Evil Academy's Home Economics Teacher, Mr. Champloo, has a fair number of these make up a good amount of his dialogue, with several cooking metaphors thrown in for good measure. Most everyone thinks he's nuts, and Almaz even has a lengthy conversation with him filled with nothing but these. | |
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Mario Party 7: The old Koopa master on Pagoda Peak describes the various board events in mystical-sounding gibberish. | |
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From Schlock Mercenary: | |
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System of a Down's "Aerials" is also composed of these. "Life is a waterfall/ We drink from the river/ then we turn around and put up our walls" Word of God has said that this song doesn't really mean anything, but that was just a joke. The song has been confirmed to be about how a mentally handicapped child looks at the world by both Shavo and Daron. | |
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Whereas the street vendors from Sleeping Dogs (2012) just make up their own: The series of missions leading up to Winston's wedding also has a portion in which Wei needs to sneak into a monastery to pick an expensive flower from its garden, which he accomplishes by putting on a robe and B.S.ing these on the fly to "blend in" when confronted by the monks. |
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Mars Attacks!: The Martian leader's speech is one of these. "All grren of skin... 800 centuries ago... Their bodily fluids include the birth of half breeds... For the fundamental understanding of the cosmos... For dark is the suede that mows like a harvest." Neatly lampshaded by General Decker: "What the HELL does that mean?!" Note that the humans need a (human-made) translating machine to understand the Martians. It's never outright stated, but there are a few hints that the machine is not working correctly. | |
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American Dad!: In "Failure is not a Factory-installed Option", Stan is scammed by a car salesman, and repeatedly goes back to him to try and get even and negotiate a good deal, but each time, he only manages to get scammed worse than before. To cure him of his materialism that got him into this mess, and his desire for vengeance, he takes a trip to a Buddhist monastery in Nepal, and comes back speaking in riddles. | |
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Invoked in The Nostalgia Critic episode "Revenge of the Commercials". The Critic compares the old Pop-Tarts slogan of "So cool, it's hot! So hot, it's cool!" to "one of those Zen riddles you're never supposed to actually get". It then shows two monks standing in a field, with sensei positing the slogan as a Koan, with the student reluctantly asking "pop tarts?" and being angrily told he's wrong. | |
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During the Magi Origin of Dragon Age: Origins, the party encounters a magical talking statue that speaks in cryptic riddles. Jowan, the player character's best friend, is not impressed. | |
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Ice-Cream Koan | |
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Gen from Genesis of Aquarion does these Once per Episode. | |
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Apparently, Red Priest Rezo from Slayers knew a lot of those, judging by how he baffles the Slayers with crazy-sounding wisdom when they find his Soul Jar. | |
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Slayers | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_638624c8 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_6514925 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
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In Action League NOW!, Stinky Diver seeks out his mentor Master Pu to prepare for his fight with the Red Ninja. Stinky Diver ends up injured after all his training, but is told that "The butterfly does not need wings to fly." When Stinky points out it does, Pu tells him "You know what I mean!" Stinky recalls during his battle, "The quills of the porcupine must sometimes flutter through the air", but has no idea what that suggests. He then remembers Master Pu translating that phrase to "Use your spear gun, idiot", which he does to win the battle. | |
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Action League NOW! | hasFeature |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_65951562 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
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Lampshaded in the Hardly Working episode "Airplane": | |
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Ice-Cream Koan | |
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Banacek has an "old Polish proverb" for every occasion. | |
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Banacek | hasFeature |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_69183dad | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_69183dad | comment |
Possum Reviews discusses this trope in his review of Dragonball Evolution, where he mocks Grandpa Gohan's "advice" towards Goku, including the line "You must have faith in who you are." | |
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Grrl Power: An unnamed alien is speaking to a Sufficiently Advanced Alien and bemoans his advice to be utterly meaningless. | |
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Ice-Cream Koan | |
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The Dungeons & Dragons module Mad Monkey vs. Dragon Claw gives the character Mad Monkey a whole page of sayings of a type called "fortune cookie philosophy". One example is "The goose may fly, the fox may stalk, but only the pig hunts for truffles with his nose." | |
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Stargate SG-1: SG-1 meets a koan-speaking monk who speaks mostly in koans that made sense with respect to the situation, except "If you immediately know the candlelight is fire, then the meal was cooked a long time ago." This one seemed to basically translate as "you need to learn to understand it, I can't just tell you" and was consequently a way of telling Daniel "I can't just answer your questions." The way of looking at it seemed to be that understanding had to come after simple knowledge. So you can know what fire is and even use it to cook your food, but to actually understand the nature of fire and how it can be converted into candlelight will come later. If you try to make the understanding happen now, you require that the simple knowledge must have existed a long time ago. Originally the koan was prefaced by the koan "Because it is so clear it takes a longer time to realize it." which seems to be as close to an explanation as the monk provides. This particular "koan" is actually based on a Chinese proverb of a man who starved because he didn't realize he could light his stove with flame from his candle. In this context — immediately after Daniel claims that the Harsesis will be safe with him — the monk is telling Daniel that the child is already well protected, and proceeds to demonstrate how by teaching Daniel about Oma. The rest of the monk's speech better fits this trope, as it is mostly just obtuse metaphors, one of which Jack calls him put on: Apparently, the only way to actually understand this one is to Ascend to a Higher Plane of Existence. Daniel even uses this as a ploy when he suspects that he's being Mind Probed instead of talking to the Ancient who helped him ascend: A perfect example from earlier in the episode (around the time when Daniel begins to cotton on): There was another episode in which the Harsesis child, Shifu, appears, after having spent several years under Oma's care. He also spoke only in koans. This does make sense by the end of the episode, though. The SGC wants to use the Goa'uld race-memory to build defenses against the Goa'uld. Shifu demonstrates to Daniel that since it's race memory, you can't just take the technical knowledge without also acquiring the personality traits of a Goa'uld. So in this particular case, the music does indeed play the musician. In the same episode, Jack tries to explain one of Shifu's koans to Hammond: |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_72262aee | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_72262aee | comment |
Avatar: The Last Airbender: Huu makes one by mutating an actual Koan he used in his last appearance: Iroh is fond of proverbs, same of which wind up being more confusing than helpful. He outright lampshades this tendency in the episode "The Waterbending Scroll" while Zuko is fighting a pirate: during the fight, Iroh calls out "Are you so busy fighting you cannot see your own ship has set sail?" to which Zuko replies that it isn't the time for proverbs. Iroh points out the pirates' ship has been hijacked and really is leaving without them, after which the pirates make off with his and Zuko's ship. Iroh muses that "maybe it should be a proverb..." Zuko creates "wisdom" that even he doesn't understand whenever he tries to imagine what his Uncle Iroh would say in a given situation. |
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Avatar: The Last Airbender | hasFeature |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_73b74949 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_73b74949 | comment |
The psycho enemies in the Borderlands series (especially 2 and onward), have nothing remotely sensible to say as they rush you, sometimes shouting Shakespearean works that have no correlation to trying to flay you with their axes. Sometimes it isn't even quoting someone, but just pure gibberish. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_73b74949 | featureApplicability |
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Borderlands (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_73b74949 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_73d7930f | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_73d7930f | comment |
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine: In "Dramatis Personae", the Hate Plague that infects the senior staff and starts altering their personalities causes Dax to come up with this gem. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_73d7930f | featureApplicability |
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Star Trek: Deep Space Nine | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_73d7930f | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_740815bb | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_740815bb | comment |
The Agatean philosopher Lin Ty Wheadle is mentioned in several books, most notably Interesting Times, where his aphorisms included "An ass may do the work of an ox in a time of no horses". The Discworld Companion says that once you've got the knack, you can make these up at a rate of three a minute. | |
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Interesting Times | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_740815bb | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_74f7210c | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_74f7210c | comment |
The Like Likes in The Legend of Zelda are supposedly named for the fictitious proverb "Shield Eaters and World Leaders have many likes alike." | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_74f7210c | featureApplicability |
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The Legend of Zelda (Franchise) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_74f7210c | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_75584731 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_75584731 | comment |
Hilariously lampshaded in Tropic Thunder. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_75584731 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_75584731 | featureConfidence |
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Tropic Thunder | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_75584731 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_757cf125 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_757cf125 | comment |
Rocket Power: Tito often gave profound "Ancient Hawaiian" koans which mostly were actually pretty meaningful and were often relevant to the plot and/or moral of their respective episodes. The Ice Cream Koan comes from Sammy making fun of this in a video game based on his friends with the in-game Tito expy saying "Never drink milk from a coconut you find in the dark." Tito himself is baffled by this and argues that the ancient Hawaiians have never said that. This is played straight in an episode where Otto hangs out with a group of "Soul Surfers" who encourage him to skip work and abandon his responsibilities to constantly surf. They dispense such nuggets of wisdom as "there's no watch on the arm of Mother Ocean." |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_757cf125 | featureApplicability |
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Rocket Power | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_757cf125 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_761a48d7 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_761a48d7 | comment |
In the final episode of Iron Fist (2017), Danny Rand trolls Ward Meachum while persuading him to join him in Walking the Earth. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_761a48d7 | featureApplicability |
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Iron Fist (2017) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_761a48d7 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_76bb4695 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_76bb4695 | comment |
Shadow Warrior (1997) has fortune cookies as +50% health pickups. The line of text they display when you pick one up tends to be one of these (some of which are already listed in the Jokes section above). The 2013 reboot also includes them, but demotes their value to a mere 5%. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_76bb4695 | featureApplicability |
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Shadow Warrior (1997) (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_76bb4695 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_77164bc | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_77164bc | comment |
Dad from The Brak Show often delivers these to Brak as words of wisdom, but they rarely help (and Brak rarely listens anyway). His strangest one by far is from "We Ski In Peace": Incidentally, the stuff from the second half of his Koan appears on billboards a minute later. |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_77164bc | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_77164bc | featureConfidence |
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The Brak Show | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_77164bc | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_77be988d | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_77be988d | comment |
Spoofed in Thief of Time: | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_77be988d | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_77be988d | featureConfidence |
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Thief of Time | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_77be988d | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7884e8d1 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7884e8d1 | comment |
Discussed and deconstructed in Pulp Fiction. Jules loves to shout a dramatic biblical verse before killing his enemies. Said verse is seemingly an Ice Cream Koan (it's not even really from The Bible; it's a quote from a Sonny Chiba movie) and Jules is perfectly upfront that he just thinks it sounds cool. But than at the end of the movie he's given reason to think about it and realizes that it's actually remarkably applicable to his life. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7884e8d1 | featureApplicability |
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Pulp Fiction | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7884e8d1 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7b9eb68b | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7b9eb68b | comment |
My Little Pony: Equestria Girls Digital Series: Spoofed by Pinkie in "Road Trippin", after she uses her sugar-exploding power. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7b9eb68b | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_7b9eb68b | featureConfidence |
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My Little Pony: Equestria Girls Digital Series (Web Animation) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7b9eb68b | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7d8c61a2 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7d8c61a2 | comment |
A lot of dialogue options in Star Wars: The Old Republic lets your player character spew forth these, especially if you're playing Consular. Most NPCs are confused or annoyed, and the consular's padawan will even worry that she'll start sounding like that some day. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7d8c61a2 | featureApplicability |
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Star Wars: The Old Republic (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7d8c61a2 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7ec0cdab | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7ec0cdab | comment |
The Mighty Boosh is fond of playing with these. "We all dream... but do we really dream?" and from the radio, "if you look at a pebble, you will see your own face!" is Howard's scornful example of Rudy Monchego's "simple rustic wisdom." | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7ec0cdab | featureApplicability |
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The Mighty Boosh | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_7ec0cdab | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_83897713 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_83897713 | comment |
Ty Webb from Caddyshack is fond of these:- | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_83897713 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_83897713 | featureConfidence |
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Caddyshack | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_83897713 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_83e2f2d4 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_83e2f2d4 | comment |
Welcome to Sand Hands: Dr. Backpack explains time this way, staring with "Let's say time is like a pair of kids pretending to be sunglasses, and space is the man in white coveralls munching on alien eggs. Then you can think of my machine as the cutoff jeans...," and finishing with "...squeezing the life out of an orange. Does that make sense?" | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_83e2f2d4 | featureApplicability |
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Welcome to Sand Hands (Fanfic) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_83e2f2d4 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_84d1021b | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_84d1021b | comment |
NEO: The World Ends with You has Motoi, leader of one of the rival teams, engage in these often as an internet personality and con artist whose koans are all just quotes he stole from random internet posts. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_84d1021b | featureApplicability |
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NEO: The World Ends with You (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_84d1021b | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_897271d7 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_897271d7 | comment |
In Alien in a Small Town, we're treated to a single verse of alien religious scripture, without any context: “All events we experience are buffets in the backward-rushing gale of time.� | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_897271d7 | featureApplicability |
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Alien in a Small Town | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_897271d7 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8cbd5b96 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8cbd5b96 | comment |
Dancin': It's On!: "You can play baseball, you can play tennis, you can even play football, but you can't play dance." | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8cbd5b96 | featureApplicability |
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Dancin': It's On! | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8cbd5b96 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8d62323c | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8d62323c | comment |
In the Danganronpa series, Monokuma is full of these; particularly during the transition from night to morning with skits called "Monokuma Theater" where Monokuma continually spouts out his words of wisdom which all comes out as confusing nonsense. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8d62323c | featureApplicability |
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Danganronpa (Franchise) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8d62323c | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8d814070 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8d814070 | comment |
M*A*S*H: "Sometimes You Hear the Bullet" plays this trope seriously. An underage soldier confides to Hawkeye so he can serve but later Hawkeye's childhood friend dies before him in the O.R. Henry tries to offer a note of philosophy. In "The General Flipped at Dawn", Father Mulcahy handwaves this when General Steele says "There are no atheists in foxholes," evidently not sure how else to react. |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_8d814070 | featureApplicability |
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M*A*S*H | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8d814070 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8eab5c5 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8eab5c5 | comment |
Souji Tendou in Kamen Rider Kabuto had an endless supply of profound sounding quotes made by his never seen grandmother which he readily used at every opportunity — even if they were only tangentially related to the matter at hand. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8eab5c5 | featureApplicability |
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Kamen Rider Kabuto | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8eab5c5 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8f8df73b | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8f8df73b | comment |
Mu Shu Fasa deliberately baffles The Chosen One with a Koan. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8f8df73b | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_8f8df73b | featureConfidence |
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The Lion King (1994) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_8f8df73b | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_90552223 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_90552223 | comment |
In Stranger Than Fiction, the guy from human resources loves these. The lead comments quietly that he thinks he's "an idiot". | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_90552223 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_90552223 | featureConfidence |
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Stranger Than Fiction | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_90552223 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_90ab7fe1 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_90ab7fe1 | comment |
In Recess, Guru kid's advice consists mostly of these, and he even repeats the same ones to kids asking him completely different questions. Somehow though everyone still comes to him for advice. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_90ab7fe1 | featureApplicability |
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Recess | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_90ab7fe1 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_923dd091 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_923dd091 | comment |
The CollegeHumor sketch "How to Sound Smart" discusses and analyzes this by demonstrating the rhetorical devices that lend these kinds of statements the illusion of profundity. | |
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CollegeHumor | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_923dd091 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_96f7f5ac | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_96f7f5ac | comment |
The Spider-Man Mangaverse has a ton of these in the climactic 'ninja' fight-scene. Most are, upon further reflection, ridiculous. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_96f7f5ac | featureApplicability |
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Marvel Mangaverse (Manga) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_96f7f5ac | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_9b530c26 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_9b530c26 | comment |
Archie Comics: In one story, Reggie Mantle fancies himself a martial arts expert and walks around town alternating bogus "moves" with pseudo-profound sayings along the lines of "As the grasshopper drinks of the morning dew, so is adversity pondered in the dungeons of Caliban," and "As broccoli on the dinner plate of life, so is the flower of transgression." During the '60s and '70s, the writers were faced with the problem of portraying hippies in a way that did not take a stand on any of the day's important issues — they did not support hippies but did not want to alienate readers who did. Hippies were thus depicted as carrying signs with slogans that really meant nothing, such as "Stamp Out Togetherness". |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_9b530c26 | featureApplicability |
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Archie Comics (Comic Book) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_9b530c26 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_9fcc8c53 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_9fcc8c53 | comment |
Doc Louis from Punch-Out!! is a master of these on a good day. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_9fcc8c53 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_9fcc8c53 | featureConfidence |
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Punch-Out!! (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_9fcc8c53 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a183d57f | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a183d57f | comment |
On Futurama, after Adlai shoos away the orphans belittling Leela, they begin discussing their careers. After dismissing her job as being "just a package delivery" job, he gives one of his own. It comes across as an unnecessary point of fact, but Leela appeared to be impressed by it. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a183d57f | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_a183d57f | featureConfidence |
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Futurama | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a183d57f | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a3fcd166 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a3fcd166 | comment |
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Trilogy: Hark ye unto the wise words of Ford Prefect from So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish: "Life is like a grapefruit. It's sort of orangy-yellow and dimpled on the outside, wet and squidgy in the middle. It's got pips inside, too. Oh, and some people have a half a one for breakfast." And don't forget that "Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so." Arthur lampshades it when he says that Reader's Digest loves that sort of statement. And perhaps the most well known Ice Cream Koan: "What is the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything?" "Forty-two." This is very significant as, like a koan, the answer of "Forty-Two" isn't really an answer, it just means that you're not asking the right question. You need to reach a higher level of enlightenment to truly understand it. |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_a3fcd166 | featureApplicability |
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The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Trilogy | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a3fcd166 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a486ecf | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a486ecf | comment |
The manual for Bad Day on the Midway suggests that if players have moments of confusion, there is an "ultimate help device" from whom they can seek aid: Madame Mandrake, a mechanical Fortune Teller. Unfortunately she only offers useless mixed metaphors, randomly generated from a set of proverbial (and non-proverbial) sentence fragments. This can result in responses such as "An apple a day gathers no moss", "Self-preservation can't get blood from a turnip," and "A friend in need is made to be broken". | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a486ecf | featureApplicability |
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Bad Day on the Midway (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a486ecf | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a993be1f | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a993be1f | comment |
In Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords The Exile is given the option to provide Ice Cream Koans when Atton complains about how Jedi talk in riddles all the time. He immediately doubles down that it's just his luck to be stuck with the only Jedi comedian in the galaxy. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a993be1f | featureApplicability |
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Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_a993be1f | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_aabf6d1d | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_aabf6d1d | comment |
Darkest Dungeon: The Leper is usually a fan of regular koans and other sayings, whose meaning you can discern with a little thought even if they can be a little complicated. When he loses his mind and goes Irrational, however, his sayings, spouted with the same conviction and erudite tone, stop making any sense whatsoever and just sound ridiculous. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_aabf6d1d | featureApplicability |
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Darkest Dungeon (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_aabf6d1d | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ab42c63a | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ab42c63a | comment |
Get Smart: Max tries to come up with a pearl of wisdom at the end of an episode, with expected results. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ab42c63a | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_ab42c63a | featureConfidence |
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Get Smart | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ab42c63a | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_abb58ae1 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_abb58ae1 | comment |
In Spyro: Enter the Dragonfly, a wise sensei dragon tells Spyro "The way of the dragon is to be a dragon." Spyro, who is a dragon, rolls his eyes at this simultaneously redundant and nonsensical advice. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_abb58ae1 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_abb58ae1 | featureConfidence |
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Spyro: Enter the Dragonfly (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_abb58ae1 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ad283518 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ad283518 | comment |
Every issue of Private Eye contains a section called Commentatorballs which contains recent Koans uttered by sports commentators, sent in by readers. This has since expanded to cover all sorts of talking heads from newscasters to politicians. The section was originally named Colemanballs after the late BBC commentator David Coleman, who was known for being a fountain of these. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ad283518 | featureApplicability |
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Private Eye (Magazine) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ad283518 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b0b4e8ff | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b0b4e8ff | comment |
Steeper Yanru in Jade Empire offers the player several pieces of advice which he believes would make more sense if the patrons were to drink the wine. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b0b4e8ff | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_b0b4e8ff | featureConfidence |
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Jade Empire (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b0b4e8ff | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b0fc9724 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b0fc9724 | comment |
Saturday Night Live: Similar to the Sphinx are the words of Jimmy Smits's character Frank in this sketch: | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b0fc9724 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_b0fc9724 | featureConfidence |
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Saturday Night Live | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b0fc9724 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b2700e28 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b2700e28 | comment |
If the Emperor Had a Text-to-Speech Device: Played for Laughs in the fifth special episode, where Eldrad uses this trope to provide a Cryptically Unhelpful Answer. It then becomes clear that the Eldar do this to humans all the time for no other reason than to troll them. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b2700e28 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_b2700e28 | featureConfidence |
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If the Emperor Had a Text-to-Speech Device (Web Animation) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b2700e28 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b3933a70 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b3933a70 | comment |
Home Improvement: Tim Taylor was always accidentally inventing these, taking Wilson's wisdom and misquoting it later on in the show as mangled but humorous gibberish. An example: when his faulty memory turns a quote from Winston Churchill about representatives from each branch of the military being put together amounting to "the sum of their fears" when it sounds more to him like the Village People playing poker, into the following advice for his son: "You know Winston Churchill? Scared to death of the Village People." | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b3933a70 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_b3933a70 | featureConfidence |
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Home Improvement | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b3933a70 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b3e81703 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b3e81703 | comment |
In Arthur, King of Time and Space's space arc, Arthur tells a crewman that in life, "when one door closes, another opens." The crewman later repeats the saying as "Life is an airlock." | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b3e81703 | featureApplicability |
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Arthur, King of Time and Space (Webcomic) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b3e81703 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b40554c8 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b40554c8 | comment |
A ninja gives a particularly nonsensical, memetic and hilarious version in episode one of Black Dynamite: | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b40554c8 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_b40554c8 | featureConfidence |
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Black Dynamite | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b40554c8 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b565ccc5 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b565ccc5 | comment |
Loki (2021): A drunk Loki gives a long comparison of love to a dagger, which Sylvie mocks as not making any sense: | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b565ccc5 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_b565ccc5 | featureConfidence |
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Loki (2021) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b565ccc5 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b5c45bf5 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b5c45bf5 | comment |
This is the M.O. of the Over the Edge character Koanhead. Of course, when he unloads one, it comes true. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b5c45bf5 | featureApplicability |
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Over the Edge (Tabletop Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b5c45bf5 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b61bbe0a | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b61bbe0a | comment |
Phil Dunphy on Modern Family has a few of these. "When Life gives you lemonade, make lemons. Life will be all like whaatt?" | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b61bbe0a | featureApplicability |
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Modern Family | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b61bbe0a | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b86fe5e5 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b86fe5e5 | comment |
The following joke from A Prairie Home Companion. You're supposed to get it easily. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b86fe5e5 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_b86fe5e5 | featureConfidence |
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A Prairie Home Companion (Radio) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b86fe5e5 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b8c39fe6 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b8c39fe6 | comment |
Parodied in Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves with Xenk, The Comically Serious paladin who tends to speak in earnest, profound tones whenever possible. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b8c39fe6 | featureApplicability |
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Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b8c39fe6 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b8cf5e31 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b8cf5e31 | comment |
Expeditionary Force: The religion of Skippyism is built around these (and providing followers with cash via his hacking skills). Skippy literally searched the internet for vague feel-good sounding expressions and quotable lines before compiling them into a book for his followers. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b8cf5e31 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_b8cf5e31 | featureConfidence |
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Expeditionary Force | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_b8cf5e31 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ba7ff9bc | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ba7ff9bc | comment |
The Two Princesses of Bamarre: The protagonist's father has an entire book (Homely Truths) filled with these, which he consults before he does anything. After the protagonist tells Vollys, a dragon, about the Truths, Vollys makes up a few of her own. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ba7ff9bc | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_ba7ff9bc | featureConfidence |
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The Two Princesses of Bamarre | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ba7ff9bc | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bb1b8e8c | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bb1b8e8c | comment |
In the first campaign of Critical Role, Percy tries to explain his theory about the Echo Tree with the phrase "Life needs things to live." Neither Percy nor the person playing him have lived that one down since. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bb1b8e8c | featureApplicability |
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Critical Role (Web Video) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bb1b8e8c | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bbe06161 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bbe06161 | comment |
The creators of Creatures hid this gem on the CD: | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bbe06161 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_bbe06161 | featureConfidence |
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Creatures (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bbe06161 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bc8b07 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bc8b07 | comment |
An episode of Epic Rap Battles of History has Laozi do this to Sun Tzu, his teammate. ("A bowl is most useful when it is empty.") The general has had enough at that point and tells the philosopher to fill that bowl with "shit that makes some sense." It actually did make sense in context (their best move at that point was to do nothing and let the other team tear each other apart) but there was no reason to be so cryptic about it. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bc8b07 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_bc8b07 | featureConfidence |
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Epic Rap Battles of History (Web Video) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bc8b07 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bca72091 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bca72091 | comment |
In the Animal Crossing games from Wild World onward you can meet Pascal the Otter, who will hit you with such "deep truths" as "The more you learn, man, the less you know" and "The best things in life are free, but if you try to sell them, you always seem to make a killing". | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bca72091 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_bca72091 | featureConfidence |
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AnimalCrossing | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bca72091 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bcb32dc6 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bcb32dc6 | comment |
The Shadowrun signature character Man-of-Many-Names contributes to in-universe conversations this way. Other shadowtalkers find it odd and occasionally disturbing when his comments make sense. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bcb32dc6 | featureApplicability |
1.0 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bcb32dc6 | featureConfidence |
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Shadowrun (Tabletop Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bcb32dc6 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bd31245e | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bd31245e | comment |
The NES game Bad Street Brawler pushed one on you between each stage. The most (in)famous is the one before the first stage: It's appeared on fortune cookies, too. Whether it's a case of Ascended Meme or Older Than They Think isn't clear yet. |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_bd31245e | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_bd31245e | featureConfidence |
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Bad Street Brawler (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bd31245e | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bfef9cdb | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bfef9cdb | comment |
Welcome to Night Vale: The proverbs at the end of every episode. Cecil also opens most episodes with these. For example: |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_bfef9cdb | featureApplicability |
1.0 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bfef9cdb | featureConfidence |
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Welcome to Night Vale (Podcast) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_bfef9cdb | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c0c57462 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c0c57462 | comment |
In Chrono Trigger, the inhabitants of Zeal seem to like these. For instance, "Am I a butterfly dreaming I am a man, or am I a bowling ball dreaming I am a plate of sashimi?". This one is a parody of a famous parable in the writings of Chinese philosopher Zhuangzi, in which Zhuangzi wakes from a dream of being a butterfly unsure if he is a butterfly dreaming he is a man or a man dreaming he is a butterfly. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c0c57462 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_c0c57462 | featureConfidence |
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Chrono Trigger (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c0c57462 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c11dc7e6 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c11dc7e6 | comment |
In Less is Morgue, cult leader Thackery Boggs literally reels off dessert-themed proverbs constantly, on account of being the head of a pudding-based religious movement. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c11dc7e6 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_c11dc7e6 | featureConfidence |
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Less is Morgue (Podcast) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c11dc7e6 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c1a76652 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c1a76652 | comment |
Black Books: When the Little Book Of Calm is swallowed, and hijinks ensue: | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c1a76652 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_c1a76652 | featureConfidence |
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Black Books | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c1a76652 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c2441a09 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c2441a09 | comment |
The Chronicles of Jaller: The titular character. He knows tons of meaningless phrases. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c2441a09 | featureApplicability |
1.0 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c2441a09 | featureConfidence |
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The Chronicles of Jaller (Web Video) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c2441a09 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c43df4d8 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c43df4d8 | comment |
Doctor Who: The Seventh Doctor is known to get human expressions mixed up from time to time, with one resulting in a koan: "Time and tide melts the snowman." In the episode "The Fires of Pompeii", the Doctor and a soothsayer trade these. When it turns out that he does have the ability to see the future and knows exactly who the Doctor is, it's quite the Oh, Crap! moment. Notably, the last expression, with which the Doctor "wins" the exchange, is "I concede that every sun must set, yet the son of the father must also rise," which, in addition to being meaningless, also relies on a pun (son/sun) that doesn't work in Latin, the language they're supposedly speaking at the time. It would explain why the soothsayer gives up at this point, actually; from his perspective, it's random gibberish. |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_c43df4d8 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_c43df4d8 | featureConfidence |
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Doctor Who | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c43df4d8 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c4b4efd5 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c4b4efd5 | comment |
Uncyclopedia offers this one: | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c4b4efd5 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_c4b4efd5 | featureConfidence |
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Uncyclopedia (Website) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c4b4efd5 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c5eaa1a9 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c5eaa1a9 | comment |
Beetlejuice: In one episode BJ and Lydia deal with a poultrygeist, a ghostly chicken that has answers to every question, so they confuse it into submission by asking it koans. Beetlejuice delivers this gem: | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c5eaa1a9 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_c5eaa1a9 | featureConfidence |
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Beetlejuice | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_c5eaa1a9 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ca5d97f1 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ca5d97f1 | comment |
Monty Python's Flying Circus: Gavin Millarrrrrrrrrrrrrr's report on a Neville Shunt play that uses railway timetables as a metaphor turns into a non-stop series of koans. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ca5d97f1 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_ca5d97f1 | featureConfidence |
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Monty Python's Flying Circus | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ca5d97f1 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_cd8905f6 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_cd8905f6 | comment |
In Baccano!, Ronnie responds to Ennis's questions about his apparent omniscience (caused by being, well, literally omniscient) with a rambling existential monologue that seems profound and mysterious at first glance, but was really just to confuse her into dropping the subject. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_cd8905f6 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_cd8905f6 | featureConfidence |
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Baccano! | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_cd8905f6 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d0164793 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d0164793 | comment |
Quite a few accidental ones pop up in Maradonia and the Seven Bridges by Gloria Tesch. Multiple attempts at profundity fall flat throughout the book, including this quote lifted from Henry David Thoreau: | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d0164793 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_d0164793 | featureConfidence |
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Maradonia Saga | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d0164793 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d38fe19f | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d38fe19f | comment |
In Star Wars: Clone Wars, Jedi Master Luminara Unduli has a monologue during Bariss Ofee's lightsaber construction ceremony. It's actually correct, according to the themes of the franchise, but still somehow sounds like nonsense. Mostly she just rearranges the same six words over and over: | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d38fe19f | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_d38fe19f | featureConfidence |
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Star Wars: Clone Wars | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d38fe19f | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d45868 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d45868 | comment |
An outtake from the 1980s film The Fiendish Plot of Dr. Fu Manchu has Peter Sellers apparently ad-libbing one before breaking into helpless laughter: "When you are great with spheroid, it is not known for whom the ball falls." | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d45868 | featureApplicability |
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The Fiendish Plot of Dr. Fu Manchu | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d45868 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d718a80b | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d718a80b | comment |
From Ask a Ninja: | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d718a80b | featureApplicability |
1.0 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d718a80b | featureConfidence |
1.0 | |
Ask a Ninja (Web Video) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d718a80b | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d849efdf | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d849efdf | comment |
This trope is a driving force for much of the plot of Being There, where the intellectually disabled Chance's ramblings about gardening, television, and other facets of his life are repeatedly mistaken for profound political and philosophical musings. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d849efdf | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_d849efdf | featureConfidence |
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Being There | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d849efdf | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d8c8227a | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d8c8227a | comment |
Street Fighter gives us "Once you were like this stream... laughing, flowing around life. Now you are like this tree—strong, flexible... but yet rooted in your obsession." | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d8c8227a | featureApplicability |
1.0 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d8c8227a | featureConfidence |
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Street Fighter (Malibu Comics) (Comic Book) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_d8c8227a | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_da093071 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_da093071 | comment |
This is the entire schtick of Cho from No Need for Bushido. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_da093071 | featureApplicability |
1.0 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_da093071 | featureConfidence |
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No Need for Bushido (Webcomic) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_da093071 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_db3b75ff | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_db3b75ff | comment |
In Barney Miller, Japanese-American cop Nick Yemana would occasionally come out with a piece of "Oriental wisdom" from his grandfather that ended up like this, such as "Many things look bleak at the moment of their occurrence, but at least we ain't got locusts." | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_db3b75ff | featureApplicability |
1.0 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_db3b75ff | featureConfidence |
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Barney Miller | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_db3b75ff | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_db404a1a | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_db404a1a | comment |
Kengan Ashura: Shen Wulong from Kengan Omega apparently has a habit of saying things that sound profound but are actually non-sequiturs. Lampshaded by Yan. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_db404a1a | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_db404a1a | featureConfidence |
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Kengan Ashura (Manga) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_db404a1a | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_df7e11cd | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_df7e11cd | comment |
In Manly Guys Doing Manly Things, Commander Badass finds that the best way to prevent people overthinking the logistics of time travel and causing reality paradoxes is to distract them with a nonsensical koan during the trip. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_df7e11cd | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_df7e11cd | featureConfidence |
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Manly Guys Doing Manly Things (Webcomic) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_df7e11cd | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e1ec0e62 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e1ec0e62 | comment |
In Grand Theft Auto IV, the spoof anime Princess Robot Bubblegum Show Within a Show has Master Hentai spouting a string of these to his pupil in a deliberately meandering and nonsensical manner. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e1ec0e62 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_e1ec0e62 | featureConfidence |
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Grand Theft Auto IV (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e1ec0e62 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e25322af | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e25322af | comment |
Homestar Runner: In the Strong Bad Email "no loafing", Strong Bad decides to supplement the "NO LOAFING" sign in his computer room with some motivational posters, including a poster of a windsurfer with the caption "Failure is not a four-letter word" and a wood-burned image of a horse with the caption (pictured above) "The loneliest goat sees the last sunset last..." | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e25322af | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_e25322af | featureConfidence |
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Homestar Runner (Web Animation) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e25322af | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e597b936 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e597b936 | comment |
In fact, Discordians deliberately use them to gum up their own and other people's brains. These are referred to in the Principia Discordia as "Mondos". | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e597b936 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_e597b936 | featureConfidence |
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Principia Discordia | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e597b936 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e6e72f96 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e6e72f96 | comment |
In the Loop: Simon Foster tells the world's media "To walk the path of peace, we must be prepared to climb the mountain of conflict." Linton Barwick is also fond of coming out with soundbites that sound deep and meaningful but hold little substance. As is his chief asskisser, Chad, whose own feeble attempts at currying favour with his boss by doing this sound even worse. This eventually provokes a fed-up British character to inform him that he sounds like "a crap Jesus." "In the land of truth, my friend, the man with one fact, is the King." |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_e6e72f96 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_e6e72f96 | featureConfidence |
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In the Loop | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e6e72f96 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e764d136 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e764d136 | comment |
Hark ye unto the wise words of Ford Prefect from So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish: "Life is like a grapefruit. It's sort of orangy-yellow and dimpled on the outside, wet and squidgy in the middle. It's got pips inside, too. Oh, and some people have a half a one for breakfast." | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e764d136 | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_e764d136 | featureConfidence |
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So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e764d136 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e9c7b01b | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e9c7b01b | comment |
In Dissidia Final Fantasy, the trade accessories needed to craft each character's Level 100 weapon each come with a line or two relevant to that character. Several try to be profound and somewhat succeednote "Someday they will understand... It is not love, but the will to love that counts.", while others are just nonsensical to the point they're almost meaningless. | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e9c7b01b | featureApplicability |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_e9c7b01b | featureConfidence |
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Dissidia Final Fantasy (Video Game) | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_e9c7b01b | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ea4f62db | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ea4f62db | comment |
Parodied by Family Guy in this clip. The actual song lyrics: | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ea4f62db | featureApplicability |
1.0 | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ea4f62db | featureConfidence |
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Family Guy | hasFeature |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ea4f62db | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ec33acd3 | type |
Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ec33acd3 | comment |
Riina Tada of THE iDOLM@STER: Cinderella Girls spouts off a couple of these to hide her lack of rock song knowledge, providing sayings like "if you think it's rock, it's rock". | |
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Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ec80dae4 | comment |
Zero Punctuation: Yahtzee started off his review of Boneworks by relating something a wise man once told him: "He who dwells on the past has eyeballs glued to his bum cheeks." | |
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Ice-Cream Koan | |
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The Ephebian philosopher Didactylos (Small Gods) generally prefers aphorisms such as "You can't trust any bugger further you can throw him, and there's nothing you can do about it, so let's have a drink," but is also responsible for "It's a wise crow that knows which way the camel points". | |
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Small Gods | hasFeature |
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Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ed535562 | comment |
In The Secret of NIMH the back of the amulet Nicodemus gives Mrs. Brisby has a proverb that reads "You can unlock any door, if you only have the key". | |
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Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ef076a36 | comment |
Star Trek: Voyager: Many of Neelix's "Talaxian sayings" are these: A flashback scene reveals that Tuvok was a Former Teen Rebel against the Vulcan philosophy of strict emotional control. Inverted in "Parturition". |
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The hot-dog-stand man in Kingdom of Loathing spouts old sayings, reworded into complete absurdity. | |
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Clarence's Big Chance: One of the dialog choices during the date is "You're like a summer breeze blowing in the wind". Selecting it makes your date think you're poetic. | |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_f2ce02ea | comment |
Key & Peele: Parodied in the "Magical Negro Fight" sketch, with Peele's magical negro character being an Almighty Janitor who empties the trash can of the stressed white businessman protagonist while telling him: "You know, I find the more garbage in the can, the better it feels to dump it all out! I suppose that's why we let it get so full in the first place... so we can start over!" before Key's magical negro character arrives to fix a printer and give his own words of wisdom to the white man: "Sometimes things aren't really broken... it's the way we treat 'em that needs to be fixed!" After the two have destroyed each other at the end of a magical fight, trashing the whole office, a black woman cleaner enters and observes the chaos: | |
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Ice-Cream Koan / int_f74b5f80 | comment |
Babylon 5: While Kosh delivers many a genuine Koan in the course of the series, in "Deathwalker", he proceeded to engage in a Cryptic Conversation with a character named Abbut which consists mostly of these. It counts as this trope because the real purpose of the conversation is to get a mental scan of Talia, ostensibly there as a telepathic mediator, to stimulate and preserve her feelings of reflection, surprise and terror. If her character hadn't left the show, this would have been used as insurance after "Divided Loyalties". G'Kar gives a few when his followers fail to grasp his point, just to shut them up: This is also a bad habit of Byron's, sharing space with blackmail, arrogance, and having a really bad haircut. |
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Shi-Long Lang's "Lang Zi Says" quotes in Ace Attorney Investigations: Miles Edgeworth eventually degenerate into this, so much so that he stops trying. | |
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Ice-Cream Koan | |
Ice-Cream Koan / int_ff3702d5 | comment |
In Spirit Hunters Kitsune Sura is a Taoist with a rather unique interpretation of things. She often spouts things like "Abiding in a mustard seed, I shall gaze down upon the stars and mountains." | |
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